As you begin to observe your thoughts, their flow will begin to decrease. Before, I didn’t think about anything, I didn’t think about anything. For example, I need to call a person, I prepared for a very long time and thought and thought... And now I don’t allow myself to waste my energy so thoughtlessly. If I’m not ready, I don’t call, without regrets and without criticizing myself. If I feel ready, I dial the number. It’s the same with things, I don’t think about them. I give time to the process, the right people appear, events begin to line up in the right way. If something doesn’t work out, for me this is a sure sign not to start thinking, but to postpone decisions and actions for now. After all, everything should be easy and simple for a woman.
Stop dreaming and flying in the clouds about how everything could be. I'm talking about fruitless dreams that only take away energy but lead nowhere. You need to dream, I would say wish, but in a special state - harmony and fullness. You need to release your desire into the world, and it will come true very easily. Right desires fill you, make your eyes glow, fruitless dreams empty you. But this is a topic for another discussion. Subscribe to the newsletter so you don't miss out.
What will the principle of “Live in the present” give?
When we are aware of our body and concentrate on our movements, our mind calms down. Women's minds are very restless today. It does not allow you to relax and truly enjoy life.
As you begin to use your body, your sensitivity and the sensations you receive will become fuller and brighter. This means that life will become more joyful and diverse. Don't look for sensations on the outside, they are in your body.
When you live in the present and are aware of what is happening, you are truly involved in the process of communication, for example, with your child. How often our communication boils down to feeding, putting to bed, monitoring. We seem to be close, but energetically we are very far away, so children get sick and behave badly because they do not receive life-giving subtle life energy from their mother. The fullness of communication and happiness from communicating with a child can only be felt if you are fully involved in the process, your whole body, all your senses.
By including all your senses, you will be able to feel the world around you, look at it, interact with it differently, receiving incredible pleasure. You will begin to truly see, hear, feel everything that happens in life.
You will be able to truly experience the beauty of the world around you. How many emotions, how many new positive moments nature or animals can give. By and large, we have become blind and deaf, our vision is blurred, and our ears hear only our own mental reflections. We have forgotten how to be observant, attentive, to enjoy the rays of the sun, the singing of birds, the variety of shades, shapes, and beauty that exist in this world.
By living in the present, you can get pleasure and pleasure from the simplest things. Please note that our life consists of simple and ordinary things; holidays, vacations and vacations occupy a very small part of ordinary life.
Our mood is determined by our feelings. When we are not aware of what we are feeling, we are addicted to uncertainty. Start choosing feelings and your mood will improve significantly. Nothing prevents you from replacing disappointment with curiosity, anger with attention and kindness.
The process of living in the present is very creative. The more we pay attention to the good, the more of it becomes in our lives.
The more you begin to be aware of your actions, actions, motivations, feelings, thoughts, the faster you will free yourself from various mental rubbish that makes your life miserable and deprives you of energy.
“I began to bring myself back to reality and there was more energy. Moreover, I didn’t need to do this for a long time. I felt much better already on the second day. It turned out that my, at first glance, harmless soaring in the clouds takes a lot of energy.”
Fill every step you take with meaning and positive manifestations. Don’t just go out into the street being irritated, but start wishing good things in your mind for people. Good deeds increase your awareness, and you begin to live in the present with those people who already exist, and not sometime later, when everything changes and everyone becomes ideal and loving.
If you begin to feel life, then your life will become calm, unhurried. I'm not saying that there won't be movement in it, there just won't be any unnecessary fuss and haste. Life will become beautiful, joyful, happy, harmonious and conscious.
Only you can change your life by starting to simply live it! The content and fullness of everyday life depends on you, color it with new sensations, new feelings, colors and your female life will become perfect. It will never be boring, sad and lonely, you will not expect anything special from life, understanding and feeling that your life is already special, you just need to learn to feel it, savor every moment and live from the heart every minute.
Tatiana Dzutseva.And it will seem that life is even very filled with emotions - communication, relaxation, peace, desire and delight. But as soon as the object of addiction disappears, a painful thirst sets in in every sense, dissatisfaction, melancholy, which again urges to “shut up” with something else.
Employment
Endless work, important matters, requests from family and friends. All this is “the best medicine for sorrows.” The main thing is to run without stopping. Don't be alone with yourself. Stuff other people's meanings and the illusion of necessity into yourself.
But “for some reason” the work does not bring enough satisfaction, and it does not always bring in enough money. But for some reason the relationship is not going well, and friends and relatives are not particularly grateful for the efforts.
After all, in order to build relationships, get satisfaction from work, real warmth from family and friends, you need to be aware of what you want. Be aware from the depths of yourself, from the depths of feelings. And be able to articulate it.
Diseases
What does it mean to feel? - live and be. After all, when you act like automatons, you simply follow commands. And it’s not a fact that they are their own. And when you become aware of feelings, you know for sure that it is you yourself and this life is definitely yours.
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Sex is an essential part of our lives. Not only your mood, psychological state, but also your health depends on its quality. Each of the partners wants to receive the highest pleasure from intimacy, but if it is easy for men to achieve orgasm, then for the fair sex it is not so simple. In this article we will tell you how to experience an orgasm for a woman: ways to obtain maximum pleasure, types of orgasm and existing misconceptions.
Sexologists, through numerous studies, have found that not every woman can experience pleasure during sex. Some people experience orgasm from time to time, and some have never experienced it. Less than fifty percent of women achieve the highest pleasure using the classical method, while others have to use additional methods for this (sexual toys, masturbation, etc.) or fake an orgasm.
A woman's ability to experience pleasure during sex depends on several factors. First of all, these are, of course, the actions of the partner - with a more experienced and attentive man, the chances of getting the cherished pleasure increase. However, your feelings for your partner also play a big role - a woman wants her beloved man more, the touches and caresses of her beloved hands and lips bring incomparably more pleasure. It's no secret that sex with a loved one is always more vibrant and sensual, therefore, the likelihood of achieving orgasm with a lover is higher.
The woman's age also plays a role. Often, sexual experience does not depend on age: some begin sexual activity at fifteen, others at twenty-five, but no one has canceled physiology. A woman reaches the peak of her sexuality around the age of thirty. Plus, a mature woman can understand her body better, she knows what she wants, how and for how long.
If for a man the appearance (he loves with his eyes) and behavior of his partner are primarily important, then for women a much larger set of factors plays a key role. Feelings, mood, atmosphere, gentle words, even smell are important. Everything originates first of all in the head. Even a recent quarrel with a partner can leave a negative imprint. With a good start (and it's not just foreplay), the likelihood that you will experience an orgasm during intimacy is much higher.
Types of female orgasm
The female orgasm, unlike the male one, is accompanied by more vivid sensations, plus the fair sex is capable of multiple orgasms, while men are deprived of this privilege. According to sexologists, orgasm in women is divided into three types: clitoral, vaginal and extragenital.
Clitoral orgasm can be obtained by stimulating the partner with fingers, tongue, or through masturbation. To experience a vaginal orgasm, you need to stimulate the vagina with a phallus, vibrator or fingers. The more often and more intensely such stimulation occurs, the shorter the orgasm, oddly enough. With less intense stimulation, the orgasm is usually stronger and lasts longer. Extragenital orgasm can be experienced through passionate hugs, kisses, caresses, that is, without sexual intercourse. Not every woman is capable of this type of orgasm, but, nevertheless, it is possible.
For a woman, an orgasm lasts on average thirteen to twenty-five seconds, sometimes this time can reach up to a minute. With multiple orgasms, the state of ecstasy can persist for ten minutes - pleasure, introducing an indescribable state of bliss, comes in waves almost without stopping.
Differences between clitoral and vaginal orgasm
A clitoral orgasm is more like stress relief and relaxation - it does not last long and is not accompanied by super-vivid sensations. From a vaginal orgasm you can lose consciousness. It occurs differently for every woman - the symptoms may differ, but they certainly will not go unnoticed. A vaginal orgasm involves the whole body and can last for a very long time. The sensations you experience are reminiscent of a roller coaster - they either increase, reaching their peak, then subside a little, and then rush up again, taking you to the pinnacle of bliss.
How do you know if you have had a vaginal orgasm? The most common signs of such an orgasm are slight trembling throughout the body, slight numbness of the limbs or even the face, goosebumps, redness of the neck and face, tinnitus, and dizziness. Changes can also be noticed in breathing - it becomes intermittent and shallow. This is exactly how voluptuous sensations manifest themselves - you may experience one of these signs or several at once, and perhaps some other sensations will appear, because in this matter everything is very individual.
Why does the body behave this way? This happens because during orgasm the brain cannot control it (the body). Plus, your body receives impulses caused by contraction of the vaginal muscles. After such bliss, women release a special hormone, oxytocin, which has a beneficial effect on the nervous system - it begins to feel protected and becomes calmer. She also develops a stronger sense of care and trust in her partner, and the relationship becomes more harmonious. Of course, after sex, a man should under no circumstances turn to the wall or leave, because a woman’s sexual arousal does not pass as quickly as his.
Misconceptions about the female orgasm
Women, like men, want to get maximum pleasure during sex. Today, the topic of female orgasm is actively discussed on the Internet - ladies share advice, experience, and some tricks with each other. However, not all advice is equally effective. Firstly, every woman is individual, and what helps one to experience orgasm is completely unsuitable for another. Secondly, among all this advice there are many misconceptions. We will tell you only about the most common of them.
Sexual intercourse should be long enough
There is an opinion that the longer a man holds out, the higher the likelihood that a woman will experience an orgasm. There is a small amount of truth in this, but one cannot ignore the fact that sex can turn into a sports marathon and simply lose the attractiveness that gives partners pleasure.
The most vivid female orgasm can be experienced within the first five to ten minutes. If sex lasts about twenty minutes or half an hour, then it becomes monotonous. Of course, after such a man’s efforts, orgasm is quite possible, but it will resemble only a weak surge of sensations and will not give unforgettable emotions. If you prefer long-term lovemaking, then you should not neglect foreplay - it will allow you to maintain arousal for a long time.
Closer to orgasm, a man should move with more force.
Another misconception is that when a woman begins to orgasm, the man must move faster and deliver harder “strikes.” However, this is not true. On the contrary, during his partner’s orgasm he should move more slowly and more gently. Many women note that during masturbation they experience more vivid and intense orgasms than during intimacy with a man. This happens for the reason that by caressing yourself, you can better feel the spasms of your vagina and, when orgasm approaches, ease the touch, focusing on your sensations.
When a man begins to thrust his penis into his partner with all his might, he does not allow her to feel the pulsation of the vagina and get full pleasure from the sensations experienced during sex. Thus, he deprives himself of great pleasure, because the penis, beating with force, is not able to feel anything other than its own sensations. If a man moves more calmly, making gentle and rhythmic thrusts, then he will help his partner experience a bright, intense orgasm, and he himself will receive great pleasure from her pulsating vagina.
Partners must experience orgasm at the same time
Simultaneous orgasm can be experienced, as a rule, only if you have already slept together many times and know each other well. In all other cases, it will be better if the woman cums first. Unlike men, even after experiencing an orgasm, a woman does not lose interest in what is happening and will continue sexual intercourse until her partner cums. The vagina, still trembling after orgasm, becomes more sensitive to the movements of the penis, and a new wave of voluptuous sensations can sweep over her.
How to have an orgasm
Lack of satisfaction during sex sometimes makes a woman doubt her sexuality. You can continue to be tormented by doubts or feign an orgasm, but it is better to try to change this situation. Not everyone dares to seek help from a sex therapist or sexologist, so in this article we have collected the most effective tips that will help you achieve orgasm and, accordingly, get rid of feelings of dissatisfaction and irritation.
Don't pretend
Women by nature are excellent actresses - they are able to pretend to be indifferent, surprised, joyful, offended, and even feign pleasure in bed. The simulation of sexual pleasure is familiar to every woman firsthand. Some people get so into the role that they are not able to distinguish a real orgasm from an acted one. Some people do this to please their lover, while others do it so as not to seem frigid or a hopeless log.
To pretend to be an actress or to give vent to real feelings - the choice is, of course, yours. But many people don’t know that such a simulation can prevent you from experiencing a natural orgasm. The fact is that by pretending you are preventing the brain, which, by the way, is your most important sexual organ, from concentrating on the sensations experienced during intimacy.
When simulating, you only think about what your partner is doing at the moment, because this is the only way you can pretend in time and portray the necessary emotions. This is one of the reasons why you don't enjoy sex. The most important condition for orgasm is based on the fact that your thoughts and your attention should concentrate only on the sensations you experience.
If you want to achieve the much-desired orgasm, then you need, first of all, to learn to concentrate on your sensations during intimacy, and not look for a specific area of the genital organs, believing that by influencing it you can enhance your sensations. Of course, there are such areas, but all your efforts will be in vain if you do not put things in order in your head, because it is the brain that is primarily responsible for receiving pleasure.
Don't think about anything other than your feelings
If the genitals did not have a connection with the brain, then there would be no pleasure from sex, even with slight excitability of the body. Our brain is the “pleasure center” and is fully responsible for the pleasure we experience. He is even able to compensate for the awkward and inept actions of his partner. Of course, this does not mean that you should ignore a man's inability to give you pleasure. Just don't forget that learning to focus on what you're feeling can work wonders in bringing you to orgasm.
Even if your partner is a true professional in everything related to sex, you may never experience an orgasm if you do not learn to listen to your own feelings and perceive them adequately. After all, everything originates from our brain, including orgasm - it does not depend on the impact on the erogenous zones. You've probably noticed that when you're in a good mood, any touch from your partner can awaken sexual desire in you. But in a bad mood, when your head is occupied with negative thoughts, even touching the erogenous zones does not evoke any emotions in you.
During intimacy, you can and should think only about your feelings, concentrate on them, and not worry about styling your hair and how you look at the moment. But you don’t need to focus on experiencing maximum pleasure - in pursuit of it, you will miss the quiet bliss of your partner’s caresses and kisses. Follow your feelings, but be relaxed, enjoy every moment.
Men don't worry about how they look during sex, so why shouldn't you follow suit - don't be afraid of having a funny face or clumsy movements. Because none of this will happen if you listen to your feelings. When it comes to intimacy, embarrassment is not appropriate - just enjoy each other.
Explore your body
To experience a female orgasm, sometimes you need to make some effort. For example, study your body and explore its reactions to intimate caresses. This will allow you to understand what sensations you experience as you approach the peak of bliss, the signs that precede sexual satisfaction.
According to sex therapists, the best way to study a woman's body and its reactions is masturbation. If you haven't tried it yet, now might be the time. At the same time, masturbation should not completely replace sexual life - it is just one of the ways to get to know your body, which you can use from time to time. If you have doubts about your sexuality and ability to experience orgasm, then try masturbating. If you experience pleasure during masturbation at least once, then everything is fine with you.
Having studied your body and its reactions to intimate caresses, it will be easier for you to understand and recognize your sensations during orgasm. You may have experienced it before, but it just wasn't as intense, so you didn't notice the signs. When you know your body like the back of your hand, it will be easier for you to control your sensations - find the right position, choose the rhythm, strength of movements and depth of penetration of the penis.
Be active
There is no need to wait for your partner to finally find the right position or take the pace that suits you. If you want to experience a female orgasm, try to find the position in which you will experience maximum pleasure. Don't be afraid to be active and move more.
The “cowgirl” position allows you to better control your body during intimacy and, accordingly, increase the likelihood of achieving orgasm, when you are on top and choose the desired pace of movements and depth of penetration. Plus, in this position it is convenient to stimulate the clitoral area - you can do this yourself or trust your partner. Ask your partner to squeeze or pinch your buttocks in time with the movements - thanks to this stimulation of the nerve endings located in the pelvic area, the pressure in the vagina changes, which contributes to even greater arousal.
Eye to eye
Of course, it’s easier to concentrate on your sensations with your eyes closed, but eye contact can sometimes work real miracles. During sex, try to use positions in which you can look into each other's eyes. This can be either the classic missionary position or the “horseback” position - lean towards your partner’s chest, press your chest against his body and try to maintain eye contact most of the time. This will make it easier for both of you to tune in to the same wavelength and free your brain from extraneous thoughts. In addition, with eye contact it is impossible to pretend - it reveals true emotions.
Closer to the body
Not only eye contact allows you to experience orgasm, but also bodily contact. The more often and more closely your bodies touch during intimacy, the brighter the emotions and the more pleasure. In an excited state, the body becomes very sensitive - everything is activated nerve endings. There are quite a lot of poses where the bodies touch as much as possible. This includes the “cowgirl” position, when you are on top and pressed against your partner’s chest, and on your side, when your partner hugs you tightly from behind. You can try lying on your stomach, and your partner will enter you from behind, while you need to raise your body so that he can hug you and your bodies are in maximum contact with each other.
Be open with your partner
If you feel like you can't experience pleasure with your partner, talk to him about it. But in no case in the form of claims and accusations! This can only ruin everything. Every man wants to feel like a king in bed, and women benefit from such vanity. If you like a certain kind of affection, try to direct him in that direction - tell him that you will be absolutely delighted if he continues in the same vein, but a little more gently/faster/earlier/longer, etc. If he does not do what you would like at all, simply explain what kind of caresses you expect from him, and what excites you during intimacy.
There is no need to be shy or afraid. Sex is perhaps the most intimate part of our lives, and where, if not here, you need to be as frank as possible with yourself and with your partner. Guide your man during sex with your words or your hand. This will not only help you achieve your desired goal, but will also excite and encourage him even more. You should also not ignore his wishes.
If you have an orgasm, be sure to say so! Praise and express gratitude to your man, especially if he tried for you. This will serve you well: firstly, the man will understand what you expect from him, and secondly, your words will give him confidence in his sexual capabilities. It is also important for men to feel wanted and proud of themselves - you want gentle words of gratitude after sex, and so do they. Of course, we are not talking about sex for one evening, but if you have a regular partner, then do not skimp on praise. One “but” - only if there is something to praise for.
Stimulate the clitoris
Both your partner and you can stimulate the clitoris. Stimulation should begin with gentle touches to the peripubic area and then to the pubis. After such careful stroking, you can proceed directly to stimulation of the clitoris itself. Feel the convex point of the clitoris and begin to study your sensations - try moving your fingers left, right, up, down. Experiment with the rhythm of your movements as well. When you realize that excitement is growing, increase the intensity of caresses, but not much, because the skin in this area is very delicate, and instead of pleasure, unpleasant sensations may appear.
To experience a clitoral orgasm while intimate with your partner, try positions that engage the clitoris, or ask your partner to stimulate it with their free hand. An excellent way to achieve clitoral orgasm is oral sex. The partner needs to caress the pubic area with his tongue first, and then, when the woman is very aroused, move on to the clitoris.
Train your vaginal muscles
If you want to experience maximum pleasure during intimacy with your partner, then it will be useful for you to learn special exercises that train the vaginal muscles and thereby increase their sensitivity. These exercises must be performed three times a day, every day. Tighten your vaginal muscles as if you are trying to hold back urination. Do 10 repetitions in one approach, but do not hold the tension for more than 3 seconds.
Create a welcoming atmosphere and add variety
It is not necessary to specially prepare a romantic atmosphere, light candles and drink champagne. Just a good day together, be it a fun walk, active recreation or some kind of emotional shake-up - and at night you can count on great sex! If you have a long-term relationship with one man, then the likelihood of achieving orgasm during intimacy with him may gradually decrease. To avoid this, sometimes it is useful to introduce a little variety into your sex life - this could be some kind of role-playing game with any plot, sexual toys, or just an unusual place.
We have shared with you tips on how to achieve orgasm during sex - all you have to do is put them into practice. Throw away all embarrassments and stereotypes - when it comes to the intimate intimacy of two people, especially loving ones, there must be complete trust and freedom of expression!
