Why do you need to know the rules of conduct? Psychological lesson for younger teenagers

Psychological lesson for younger teenagers

A psychologist at school is a special person: sometimes they trust him more than close people, he knows how to listen, understand and advise something. He can tell you a lot of interesting and important things: what the child’s soul asks for. During the lessons, relationships are businesslike and regulated, but in these lessons you can get closer and try to understand each other. Confidential conversations or spontaneous games can get everyone on the same wavelength, which will be enhanced by the unexpected unity that appears. Discovering the vastness within oneself is very scary at first, but later becomes terribly interesting.

Purpose of the lesson: to form in students the need to comply with norms of behavior.

Tasks:

Give an idea of ​​the need to regulate human relationships;

Develop the ability to relate your own feelings with the feelings of others.

Equipment: blackboard, chalk, student workbooks for recording.

PROGRESS OF THE CLASS

Leading. Guys! Today we have an unusual activity. We will conduct a real scientific study with you! Who can say what the word "research" means? (Students' answers are heard.)

In general, you defined everything correctly. Yes, this is learning something new, still unknown to others. But scientific Research is different in that from the very beginning the scientist poses a question to which he seeks an answer through research. Before writing down any very serious and important statement, scientists conduct many experiments. They make sure to check whether their conclusions are correct.

So today we will try to ask ourselves a question and find an answer to it through experimentation.

First, we will open the notebooks in which we will write down the date and on a new line - “Experiment.” And here is the question to which we will look for an answer (we will write it on a new line):

Why does a person need different rules in life?

Can you answer this question now, without experimenting? (Children vying with each other to express a variety of versions.)

What did we get? Each of you thinks differently, there is no agreement between you. And the most interesting thing is that everyone says correctly. So? It is precisely in order to find one answer for everyone, while studying the problem (and you and I have a problem: there is no consensus), scientists conduct experiments. This means that an experiment should always have a goal: For what you have to do this and that.

So let’s write in our notebooks on a new line: “The goal is to find the reason that makes people live according to the rules.”

(At this time, the teacher draws a blank for the game “tic-tac-toe” on the board. Children will happily recognize this drawing.)

Draw a field for playing tic-tac-toe in your notebooks, and let's begin our experiment! I promise you that I can defeat everyone! (Some of the guys do not agree with this statement.) Let's see, let's see.... So, I'm starting first.

Walking around the class, the leader draws a cross in any cell in each notebook. Then he invites the children to make a return move with “toe” and continues the game. Having reached the third move, teacher, breaking the rules of the game, he crosses out the crosses the way he wants, declaring to each student: “I won!” This causes a stormy protest. But you need to get to the very last player, continuing to break the rules. The most “noisy” ones can be calmed down by whispering in their ears that they need to wait until the end of the experiment.

Oh! How you scream! Why?

The children shout vyingly:

– You broke the rule!

- They don’t play like that!

- You can’t do that!

- Why are you doing this?

- This is unfair!

What did I do? That's right, I violated rule! Now let's calm down and, like real scientists, try to find the answer: what happened? What caused such a cry and such indignation? First, let's try to look into ourselves, “with our pupils inside,” as the British say.

(The children gradually calm down.)

Try to answer the question: “How did you feel when I declared myself the winner against the rules? What feelings appeared at your place?”

(The teacher asks each person, writing the answer on the board.)

So, indignation, feeling that you have been deceived, resentment, thoughtfulness, dissatisfaction, shock, irritation, anger, anger...

Let's write down these words that tell about your condition in notebooks.

Tell me, are these feelings light, pleasant or dark, ugly?

(It almost sounds like a chorus that these are dark, ugly feelings.)

That's how! You unanimously decided that these were dark, ugly feelings! Unanimously, guys! Everyone felt the same, everyone said the same. And what did you want to do when suddenly you felt the pain of resentment?

That's right, you started screaming! Why? Because I didn’t want to stop right away in my violations, but you couldn’t stop me! So?

(This time, surprisingly, the children no longer scream, they try to speak more calmly. You can see how they slowly analyze themselves, their feelings in the context of words and actions.)

What conclusion can we draw? Right. When someone breaks the rules, the other person feels bad: he feels that his good mood and hope destroyed, broken. Does everyone agree? Then we will write down the conclusion in notebooks: “By breaking the rules, a person destroys the bright feelings of another person.”

Guys! Can we now answer our question: “ For what does a person need rules in life?”

(Children's answers are heard.)

Does this mean that living by the rules can help people be kinder?

Will other people treat us well if we break the rules?

So For what do people need rules?

Now you yourself must try to answer the difficult question that you have asked me many times. " Why Does it happen that teachers sometimes or often raise their voices at you during class? What does it mean raised tone of the teacher's voice?

(Almost unanimously, the guys agree that this is the result of not just “bad” student behavior, but a violation of the rules of behavior in the lesson. It is proposed to name the rules of behavior in the lesson known to students.)

Guys! Did you enjoy doing the experiment? By experimental method you on one's own were able to determine how you should behave not only in class, but also in everyday life. If you and I want to live in peace, if you and I want to have many friends, if you and I don’t want to destroy our good mood, we must remember our conclusion: “By breaking the rules, we destroy the bright feelings towards us from the other person. We are losing friends. We begin to be offended, cry, suffer. And all just because we ourselves do not follow the rules established in society.”

Violation of the rules leads the whole world of human relations to the state that you yourself called. And you yourself said that these are dark, ugly feelings, they destroy people’s relationships.

As I say goodbye to you today, I would like to wish you to always remember that your good mood depends only on whether you know how to follow the rules.

P The lesson presented to your attention was taught in fifth grade. The same methodological development was followed by a lesson in sixth grade. The result was stunning. For the first time, the children (this was reflected on their faces during the discussion) thought that the teacher is also a person and he has the right to feelings. The point is that during the discussion it is necessary to pay some attention teacher's feelings in relation to those who violate the rules of behavior in the classroom.

Children, younger teenagers, and sometimes even quite “adult” older teenagers quite often endow teachers with unpleasant epithets, label them, form an attitude towards them, which is later transferred to the subject that the teacher teaches. But after this lesson, the students suddenly discovered the reason for the teachers’ irritation.

In saying this, it is worth noting that the source of the violation is sometimes not one student, but several people, and more than once during the lesson. Invite students to think about whether it is possible to add up those “dark” feelings that they themselves named and place them in the heart of one person - the teacher. Children readily agree that this is exactly what often happens. After this, ask the “backfill” question: “Is it possible to pay for good with evil? The teachers who teach you give you new knowledge. Is it possible to kindle suffering and pain in a person’s soul by thinking only about one’s momentary desires and whims?”

After this frank conversation, the children are ready to discuss the rules that must be followed in class so as not to offend the teacher, so as not to turn him against themselves. The slowness of children's reactions to these questions indicates that they began to think...

Indeed, it is not easy for teachers, especially young ones, to maintain discipline. Under the onslaught of children's energy, some abandon the mission of an educator and concentrate their efforts on teaching functions, artificially driving themselves into the framework of guidelines and recommendations. And this is precisely what will serve as a source of emotional burnout in the future: no feedback, no creativity, no strength to work. Some teachers develop a defense that destroys many of the positive initiatives reflected in the programs. And no matter how much teachers are taught to react correctly to violations, taking into account the reasons for this very violation, they are still inherently reactive, because the students themselves teach them to be reactive...

Modern requirements for keeping diaries prohibit writing comments about a student’s behavior in them; teachers are only allowed to invite parents for consultation. Overworked parents postpone the visit for an indefinite period of time, and at this very time the child develops the habit of bad behavior. And is it legal to shift the upbringing of a child from the shoulders of professionals only to the shoulders of mothers, grandmothers and fathers? Their methods are sometimes terrifying. And some teachers believe it is unacceptable to be distracted by discipline, since there is already not enough time to “run” the program. So it turns out that a psychologist can help a teacher, and his help will be effective. You just need to be included in the system of real and large-scale problems of a modern school.

(judging by the subsequent discussion, I wrote something not very reasonable, I got excited)

What are the Rules for?

In my opinion, to protect the weak from the strong.

The rules determine what is right.
They turn to the Rules when doubts arise about what is “right” and what is “wrong” in a given particular case. We looked at the Rules - we were convinced, we figured it out.
What if there were no rules?
Then the one who is stronger (in every sense of the word) will be right.

This means that it is the weak who are interested in the Rules, so that they are understandable, “transparent”, so that they are strictly followed. So that they protect him from arbitrariness.

I don't see this interest.
The weak do not want to defend themselves. They want not to be offended, oppressed, or exploited, but they do not want to do anything for this. They hope for chance. And then – when things don’t happen – they begin to be indignant. And then howl...
Howling is scary. By animal.

They agree to work for pennies, work honestly, and then whine that no one cared about their old age.

They agree to “black” salaries, and then are surprised at the lack of even minimal social protection and the size of the pension.

They privatize apartments for one of their relatives, and then find themselves humiliated in their own home, or even thrown out onto the street.

They take out loans without reading the terms of the Agreement, and then criticize the bastard bankers who “rip off the people like crazy.”

And so on, and so on, and so on...
They will object to me - but what if there was no other way?! If there was no other job, there was no other apartment, there was no other opportunity to quickly get money?
Yes. I understand everything. I myself live in the same conditions, and I am also often forced to rely on chance, on the position of the planets, on the good-heartedness of the strong - it doesn’t work out any other way.
After all, I'm far from strong...
God save us!

But I don’t understand at all why, in cases where there is no, well, absolutely no need, the weak still do not cling to the Rules and do not use the available protection possibilities.
Not used to it?
Are they afraid of jinxing it?
Are they afraid that then everyone will turn away from them?
Do they think that all the rules are written against them?

I don't know.
I see one thing - a widespread reluctance to know the Rules, a widespread reluctance to comply with them, a widespread howl of the “offended and oppressed,” but in fact, those who simply did not bother to familiarize themselves with the next “conditions of the game.”

Is Russian happiness still only in the Good Tsar?

P.S.
An interesting thought arose during the discussion: the Rules were not written for slaves!
Reading Wikipedia:
“According to Varro, a slave is only a “talking instrument,” animate property, a beast of burden (in the language of Roman law - res, that is, thing).”
"The living conditions of a slave are determined only by the humanity or benefit of the slave owner."
“A slave is not a subject of law as an individual, as a person. Neither in relation to his master, nor in relation to third parties, a slave does not enjoy any legal protection as an independent person. The master can treat slaves at his own discretion. The murder of a slave by the master is a legal right the latter, and by someone else - is considered as an attempt on the property of the master, and not as a crime against the person."
“The position of slaves gradually, through a very long evolution, changed for the better. A reasonable view of their own economic benefit forced masters to take a thrifty attitude towards slaves and mitigate their fate; this was also caused by security considerations, especially when slaves outnumbered the free classes of the population The change in attitude towards slaves was first reflected in religious precepts and customs, and then in written laws (although it can be noted that the law first took domestic animals under protection, and only then slaves)."

Are the Rules written for you? So you are not slaves.

Surely, we all periodically pay attention to the people who are around us. Some people attract attention with their attractive appearance, while others make them turn around for a trail of pleasant perfume. But at the same time, people who stand out from the crowd receive completely different attention. It is by looking at them that it immediately becomes clear why you need to know the rules of behavior in public places.

Man is a social being. We spend a lot of time in contact with other people on the street, at work, in educational institutions and various entertainment places. And information about the rules of behavior in society helps to look organic, not attract unnecessary attention, not cause rejection and not provoke various incidents.

When a person is in society, his manners immediately become noticeable to others. Rules of behavior in various public places have been formed over many centuries. Their emergence is explained primarily by the fact that humanity needed a kind of regulator that would guarantee compliance with a number of certain rights, as well as limiting actions that could cause harm.

Man himself is a rather complex creature and can want anything. But the direct path to achieving what you want may turn out to be harmful or unpleasant for other members of society. It often happens that the interest of one person is completely contrary to the desires and aspirations of another. Of course, this can lead to conflicts and outright misunderstandings. In order for a person to have a framework, so that he knows how to behave in each specific situation, certain rules of behavior are needed.

In the old days, before the existence of laws and all kinds of written rules, people had to resolve their disputes by turning to a sage - the most revered person in the community. Nowadays, rules of behavior are taught from childhood, and they become part of us.

Certain norms of behavior allow people to understand how they can behave in certain circumstances, and to realize that certain actions are strictly prohibited. In addition, there are some rules that prescribe certain behavior in certain situations.

In fact, if such norms did not exist, then the very existence of peace in society would be impossible. People would not be able to cohabit with each other, because a certain limitation on freedom is natural for each of us. Absolute freedom implies awareness of the need, including correct behavior.

Setting boundaries for each individual helps to maintain social order. In addition, it is the observance of various rules and norms that indicates the presence of a high level of culture in society, and emphasizes the same culture in an individual.

A person who refuses to comply with established social norms causes rejection and negativity among others. Few people simply want to communicate with him.

Successful communication largely depends on the rules of behavior. After all, they allow us to simulate the possible development of events in different situations. For example, when planning various conversations and meetings, you can expect the interlocutor to behave in accordance with established social norms.

So, correct behavior is very important if you do not want to “disgrace yourself” or be known as an outright boor. Knowing the norms of behavior in various life situations will allow you to always remain a lady or a gentleman. And sometimes all readers of “Popular About Health” – children, teenagers, adults, and even the elderly – need to remember such rules.

A person who behaves correctly in society can much more easily establish contacts in a company that is not too familiar. Correct behavior helps to achieve mutual understanding and build excellent relationships, both in personal life and at work.

A little about the rules of social behavior

In principle, all the rules of social behavior can be summarized in one phrase: you need to treat others exactly the way you want them to treat you.

But let's try to add a little specificity. So:

It is important to be tactful towards people;

Do not disturb others with your behavior;

Think about safety and common sense when drinking alcohol;

Adhere to established event rules;

Ensure that it is appropriate for children to be present in a public place;

Do not violate the personal space of others, etc.

Adults need to remember that it is important to teach children to behave correctly in public places literally from the cradle. In this case, you should first of all take care of yourself at home. After all, it is from the family that the baby learns basic ideas about the norms of behavior in various situations. Of course, if mom and dad talk about how you need to behave somehow in society, but at home they prefer to ignore such recommendations, then you definitely shouldn’t expect good manners and correctness from the child. It is parental authority and personal example that underlie the formation of a child’s personality.

How parents behave in front of each other and in public, so will the child behave.

Thus, ordinary rules of behavior in public places are a simple science that will help you not feel stupid, not attract unpleasant attention and not cause condemnation.

In modern companies, managers pay great attention to corporate culture, but employees in most cases treat such efforts as eccentricities, perceiving them rather as an indicator of excessive health and irrepressibility of the manager: “If the bosses are not eccentric, then they are ill.”

This attitude is largely justified. Managers, for example, often don't know exactly what the status of projects is or how much excess items are stuck in the warehouse. Therefore, attention paid to rules of corporate conduct may seem inappropriate or untimely to employees.

But the problem that forces managers to address the topic of corporate rules is very serious. To appreciate the significance of the rules, it is enough to note: any management system is based on instructions that describe the mutual actions of employees, while the concepts of “action” and “behavior” are not identical. It would seem that for normal operation, instructions that logically regulate actions are quite sufficient. However, forms of behavior, unlike production actions, are not particularly subject to logic. The emotionality inherent in everyone can greatly influence behavior.

With a poorly configured management system, it’s bad for everyone - both managers and subordinates. As a rule, in such situations, employees have serious reasons to express dissatisfaction. Instructions, i.e. work rules, determine what the manager may be dissatisfied with, for example, low quality of the result, missed deadlines or inaccurate knowledge of the situation. And the rules of corporate behavior regulate the ways of expressing this displeasure.

The desire to spoil the mood of employees for reasons unrelated to work can be called emotional despotism. And this is where the importance of the rules of corporate behavior becomes clear! They are designed to limit acceptable forms of behavior and thereby humanize the atmosphere in the team. The rules are aimed at limiting the emotional incontinence of some and preserving the sense of personal dignity of others, which ultimately allows all participants in the working relationship to maintain mutual respect.

To be fair, it should be said that the humanization of working relationships is an extremely difficult task - primarily because climate change in the team occurs slowly. But if the company's top officials are interested in a healthy atmosphere, the problem can be solved.

The humanization of working relationships faces not only the manifestation of emotional incontinence of superiors, but also the misunderstanding by subordinates of a correct and emotionally restrained attitude towards themselves. Once upon a time, my manager spoke to the effect that the vast majority of people are not inclined to adequately perceive good treatment towards themselves. He meant that the goodwill and correctness of a leader can be perceived by subordinates as undemandingness, as a reason for dishonesty. If the boss does not shout or swear, then his orders can be ignored, and he himself cannot be taken seriously.

The creation and application of rules of corporate conduct achieve results in almost the opposite direction. On the one hand, a working environment arises in which friendly relations between employees are considered natural, and on the other hand, conditions are simultaneously created in which the presentation of mutual demands is perceived as the norm of conscientious professional relations. “Nothing personal - just business.”

The manager is interested in the effective use of the potential of each employee. In order for employees to work with full dedication, they must want to. This means that it is impossible to work productively with offended employees. Anything can happen in business relationships - it is precisely for this “anything” that rules of corporate behavior should be created.

Felix Schmiedel, director and partner of the consulting company Orgo-System

People can want whatever they want, but the implementation of their plans can harm other members of society. Sometimes the interests of some contradict the desires and aspirations of others. This causes conflicts and leads to misunderstandings. In order for people to know how to behave in such situations, it is necessary to have established rules of behavior.

In the past, when there were no laws or written rules, people would resolve their disputes by turning to the wisest person in their community. He, in turn, listened carefully to them and understood the problem. Then he advised those who argued what to do. The sages and elders were respected, and their instructions were not in doubt.

Rules of conduct help a person understand what he can do under certain circumstances, and what he is strictly prohibited from doing. There are also rules that prescribe certain behavior.

Without the proper functioning of rules of conduct, the existence of a peaceful society and cohabitation of people is impossible, because Without a certain limitation of freedom, one cannot be absolutely free. By establishing boundaries of behavior for each individual, social order can be achieved.

In addition, compliance with the rules of behavior indicates a certain level of culture inherent in a particular person. When you do not comply with established social norms, your interlocutors may develop a negative attitude towards you, and communication will be doomed to failure.

Rules of behavior to some extent make it possible to simulate the outcomes of various situations. For example, when planning a conversation, meeting, etc. you can count on the fact that your interlocutor will, in most cases, behave exactly as established social norms suggest.

Sources:

• why do we need ethics

Any human activity is based on forecasting. But the forecast is most often based on culture - the matrix of mental models of behavior in society. These models determine the same type of reactions of people belonging to the same cultural environment and ensure their constructive interaction in all manifestations of life - from emotions to technical developments.

The culture of a particular society can be considered a system of mental models that are common to the vast majority of members of that society. In other words, this is a set of established rules, relationships and concepts characteristic of people of the same mentality.

Culture, in this sense, is needed in order to facilitate the understanding and interaction of members of a society or group, its representatives. A single common cultural allows you to understand another and predict his reaction to a particular action or word. This facilitates the interaction of people belonging to the same culture, which is their common characteristic feature.

Culture facilitates interaction also because not all cases fall under the formal action of laws, treaties and regulations. Very many cases are not described by them, but, nevertheless, obvious to people belonging to the same cultural layer or. The general thing is that these people will behave the same way in these cases that are obvious to them.

Culture allows us to establish unwritten communications in business, which lawyers call “business customs,” and in everyday life, which are prescribed by etiquette. Some of these rules are learned literally with mother’s milk and are taken for granted by representatives of one culture, and are not even stipulated by any special regulations.

But, meanwhile, for representatives of another culture these things are not obvious and cause surprise and even rejection. Therefore, when people from different cultures interact, misunderstandings and difficulties arise.

Knowing the basics of the cultural environment in which you were born or live is the key that will help you communicate with those around you.

The interaction between man and state is an immense topic. It is quite obvious that without the state as a governing apparatus, chaos arises everywhere. It is absolutely necessary to fight crime, resolve emerging conflicts and disputes, and provide protection from external attacks. But it can also turn from an apparatus of protection into an apparatus of oppression and suppression; the entire history of human civilization confirms this. It is known that “power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

It is absolutely necessary that every citizen of the state, along with responsibilities, have rights. Inalienable, belonging to him from the moment of birth. Simply because he is a man and a citizen of this state. Rights that no one (including senior officials) can take away from him.

Why is this necessary? First of all, so that a person does not feel like a tiny, insignificant “cog” in a huge and powerful state machine, on which nothing depends. A person who knows that he has inalienable rights takes for granted that he is a person. Not a “cog”, not a faceless crumb in the same faceless biomass, but a free person whose rights no one dares violate or limit.

Such people clearly know what and to what extent the state can demand from them, and where lawlessness and arbitrariness begin. Therefore, they can defend their violated rights themselves and help others defend theirs. They will not be indifferent to the mistakes and wrong actions of their superiors, even at the highest level, but will demand their correction. Thus, perhaps, saving them from corruption by power, and their country from big troubles.

Unfortunately, the entire course of Russian history was aimed at suppressing the individual, muffling his self-esteem and initiative. The expressions that set the teeth on edge: “Do you need more than everyone else?” or “Keep your head down!” speak eloquently about this. The manifestation of “individualism” was considered an unworthy act, deserving condemnation of society. We must decisively get rid of this! If Russian citizens take an active position in life and are ready to resolutely defend their rights, without considering themselves “cogs,” our society will have a chance to change the situation for the better.

Video on the topic

Sources:

• why do we need people

A person does not always receive a good upbringing in the family or in kindergarten and school. But it’s never too late to learn, and you can instill healthy habits in yourself even in adulthood. If you treat others with respect, you will experience how pleasant and interesting communication with other people can be.

Instructions

Behave in society at ease and freely, confidently and with self-esteem. To avoid getting lost in the spotlight in front of a large audience, develop your eloquence and ability to think logically. This way you can always formulate your thought, even without having a ready-made text in front of your eyes.

Almost all people have a “vein” of the soul of society within them; you just need to work on yourself. Do not hesitate to make new acquaintances, communicate with respected interesting people. Read the classics and acclaimed ones to expand your vocabulary. This will always help you find topics for conversation with any interlocutor.

Don't talk bad about people, don't gossip or slander. Try to treat your interlocutor the way you would like him to treat you. If you find yourself in an unfamiliar company, do not break the rules adopted there and do not judge them.

Humor can help you out if you find yourself in a difficult situation and don't know how to answer a question. Don't be afraid to admit that you don't know something.

Know how to listen to your interlocutor, do not interrupt him. Express your opinion on this issue later. If you are interrupted, do not point out to the person his mistake, listen to what he has to say.

Sources:

• About the ability to behave in society
• how to behave in society

Compliance with state laws is one of the guarantees of order in society. The presence of power that ensures the unquestioning implementation of all legislative norms is also an important aspect of the normal existence of the country.

The legislation of the country ensures the protection of the rights and. There are systems for managing and monitoring the well-being and security of different countries, which is determined by the historical events of the development of states.

For the most part, laws directly or indirectly affect a person’s life, providing the opportunity to work and live normally, while minimally restricting his freedom.

Narrow areas of specially targeted activities affecting certain segments of the population are governed by regulations. This is rather an exception to the rule.

General principles of the impact of laws

All provisions of norms and laws established by the state are subject to general rules, compliance with which is very important.

1. Protection of minorities at various levels, fair distribution of rights and responsibilities regardless of rank, rank, or position in society.
2. The ability to make independent decisions and defend one’s point of view within the framework of general provisions.
3. Limitation of malicious acts, imposition of penalties in case of deviation from the norms.
4. The predominance of public interests while respecting personal needs.
5. Making significant adjustments to people's behavior.
6. The creation of norms and changes in rules are allowed only by a group of legislators independent of the circumstances; the approval of documents is carried out by leaders elected by the people of the country.
7. The adopted acts make the generally accepted national idea a winner, the implementation of which improves the well-being of the entire society.

Possible problems in the absence of a legislative framework

If for some reason society does not comply with the overall rules, and there is no supervisory authority, then all relationships can turn into chaos. You need to know that in this case the state and the people receive:

1. Lack of security for citizens and the entire community.
2. The predominance of the rights of force, which does not obey reason.
3. Revelry and violence.
4. Creating the ground for strengthening nationalist ideas leading to genocide.
5. The growth of anti-democratic sentiments.
6. A bias towards compliance with unwritten laws, which differ in different segments of the population.
7. Anarchy and loss of citizen integrity.
8. Uncontrolled change of power according to the principle: “he who is stronger is right.”

To prevent situations of lawlessness, the state has security forces designed to ensure order.

Video on the topic