How to respond to a friend's insult. How to learn to respond to insults and not provoke new ones


Why? Why did you take this insult personally? Do you feel guilty? Haven’t you learned how to respond to such psychological attacks?

Knowing the enemy by sight makes it easier to fight. Is it necessary? Or it’s worth developing a certain tactic of responding (or rather, NOT responding) to insults. When a person deliberately wants to insult you, ask yourself the question - WHY?

Why is he doing this? Does he want to humiliate you in order to elevate himself? Then his action evokes compassion. This is the only way a person can assert himself.

Or he wants to touch your nerves in order to piss you off. For what? He is looking for a lightning rod in you, wants to drain his irritation somewhere.
Always think - why? And only after you understand the root cause and choose a model of your behavior. After all, we cannot be offended, we can only be offended. Sami. This means that such a reaction is the result of his own choice.

Leo Tolstoy also said: “It's all about thoughts. Thought is the beginning of everything. And thoughts can be controlled. And therefore the main task of improvement is to work on thoughts.”

The main groups of fans of insults:

  • Losers. Their only way to assert themselves is to belittle the other person.
  • These are people who get pleasure and are “energized” by quarrels, scandals, including insults to other people. They feel good when others feel bad.
  • Aggressors: people who see everyone as an enemy. To protect themselves, they attack other people first.
  • Ill-mannered people for whom the norm is to communicate in the language of insults.

If you immediately begin to react thoughtlessly after being insulted, your offender will celebrate his victory. FOR WHAT?
Why give him such an opportunity! How do we react to insults? A fool is a fool himself. Is this a familiar picture?
When you see this from the outside, you understand that both are these very stupid people. One, due to lack of upbringing and restraint, allowed himself to do this, and the second, tuning into its destructive wave, accepted the terms of this “game”. Both are worthy of compassion.

Sometimes we receive insults so unexpectedly that we don’t even have time to react positively. Offensive words hurt, they penetrate into the very heart like sharp needles. We don’t know what to say in the first minute, but “after the fight” we come up with a plan for revenge.
Now stop and look at the situation from the outside. Stupid and funny. Wit on the stairs. What are we spending our precious life on! The person has long forgotten about his attack, and you carefully and scrupulously cultivate the seeds of revenge in YOUR soul. And they very systematically destroy you from the inside. FOR WHAT?

If, nevertheless, you understand that it is you who are the master of your thoughts, and not vice versa, stop and imagine the whole situation from space. Are you crying now? Are you offended? What would it look like on a cosmic scale? Insignificant and not worth your nerves. It even becomes funny - such a trifle causes so much worry.
Have you calmed down? Now go to the window and carefully, even in the smallest detail, examine some object outside the window. You switched your attention, took a deep breath and... you felt better.

At first it will not be easy to get rid of destructive thoughts, and resentment will remind itself from time to time.
STOP! Stop the flow of sad thoughts. Drink delicious tea with lemon and honey. Listen to good music.. Watch a comedy. Play with your pets. Switch to a positive wave.


If the offender is a stranger, then you should not be provoked, indulge in mutual accusations and showdowns. The wisest step is to ignore.

It's harder to do this when your boss or co-worker insults you. In this case, it is better to avoid the conflict. If this is your boss and you are still forced to communicate with him, then you will have to develop certain tactics of behavior.
Psychologists recommend first of all to understand what exactly in your work caused such a reaction, to isolate constructive criticism, where exactly you did not complete your work or made a mistake.

The next step is to protect your psyche from verbal “attack.”
There is such a technique. It's called "aquarium". When your boss starts shouting and insulting half a turn, imagine him in an aquarium, like a fish that opens its mouth, but no words can be heard. Such a protective shell greatly helps to abstract oneself. Words, like balls, bounce off without reaching their target.

In general, as far as the boss is concerned, one must act carefully. In this case, before responding to an insult, you need to imagine that in front of you is a small, capricious child. And your task is to calm him down, pat him on the head, caress him and feed him semolina porridge. By placing yourself in such a situation, you will easily endure attacks, meeting them calmly and with a smile. This will also affect the emotional state of the boss.

If you watched the movie "The Matrix", then you remember the moment when Neo stopped the bullets fired at him. Imagine that the rudeness thrown at you is like bullets, and you are invulnerable, and all the rudeness does not reach you, falling with a ringing sound on the floor.

If silence doesn't work, you can respond with a little barb.

“A gentle answer removes malice; hurtful words arouse anger.”
John Ruskin

It’s a good technique, but it requires a certain amount of training and endurance—to respond politely to malicious insults. Or, as a last resort, say calmly: “How ill-mannered and rude you are.”
Sometimes this acts like a tub of cold water on the offender. In any case, you get a pause and can retreat from the battlefield with your head held high.

The worst way to react, in my opinion, is to shout back some nonsense. Of course, in this way you become a twin brother and slide down to the level of this ill-mannered type. But sometimes it helps relieve tension. Especially if you took it two octaves higher.

Helps much better method of releasing negative emotions into the water. Open the tap and simply scream everything that has boiled into the stream of water. How helpful it is! Wash your face with cool water and go get positive emotions. The conflict is over. You turned out to be smarter! Give yourself a high five and try to draw sound conclusions from this situation.

The man showed his true colors. Can you remake it? Thankless work. Either you accept him as he is, or end your relationship there. The choice is always yours! The main thing is not to fall into the role of a victim.
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We have all heard insults addressed to us and, out of surprise, we did not know how to react to them correctly. They started to be rude or cry out of resentment. Below, the psychologist gives some tips on how to intelligently respond to an insult to an offender. Gives examples of phrases that will help you get out of an unpleasant situation gracefully.

First, let's talk about several types of correct reactions to insult.

Calm


PS. We remember that an insult is a negative, deliberate statement of an assessment of a person, which humiliates his honor and dignity. It can be applied orally, in writing and even by gesture. In this case, the target of attacks does not necessarily have to be present in person.
In the Russian Federation, this is punishable in accordance with Art. 5.61 Code of Administrative Offences.

Unfortunately, we are not always able to orient ourselves in time and react correctly in situations where someone insults us. Subsequently, we become upset not only because of the very fact of other people’s insults, but also because we failed to give a proper rebuff. In many cases, you can avoid these upsets. Many people make the mistake of clearly showing the other person that their words have offended them in some way. Of course, when we are insulted, it is not easy to control ourselves and not show that we are offended and “touched to the quick.” And yet, if you fail to cope with this task, then your opponent will understand that he managed to achieve his goal and truly insult you. No matter how difficult it is for you, try to make it clear to the person that his words do not bother you at all. The best way to help you with this is humor, which often helps you react quickly in unforeseen situations. If you stock up on a few witty phrases, then, for sure, they will later be able to help you out at the right time. Examples of such remarks:

    Your words do not surprise me at all. I would be surprised if you said something really smart. And nature really has a great sense of humor if it creates specimens like you!

How to respond to insults and aggression

How to behave when you are insulted

Situations may be different, so it is advisable to adjust your behavior in accordance with them.
    For example, if you yourself have offended a person, and you understand that all his insults are just hurt pride and an attempt to take revenge for the insult, then it is better to remain silent. Probably, the interlocutor is in agony, and with additional remarks you will aggravate the situation even more. If you began to be offended undeservedly or completely “out of the blue,” then probably the opponent wants to “blow off steam,” and it is quite possible that you just fell under the hot hand. Of course, in this situation you should not be a “punching bag” - put the offender in his place! If you are insulted by a person who is clearly in an inadequate state, then it is better not to have anything to do with him and not to get involved in a dialogue. We are talking about a person who is hysterical or under the influence of alcohol or drugs. You will not be able to prove anything to such an interlocutor, and it is even quite likely that with your answers (any!) you will provoke him to a new stream of aggression or even the use of physical force. It is better to avoid communicating with such people, even if you are superior to them in physical parameters - you should not get involved in a skirmish that is unlikely to end in anything good.
Undoubtedly, such a situation is offensive for any person, and sometimes we do not know how to react to insults. There are times when it is better not to get involved in a conflict and simply ignore unpleasant remarks - for example, when they are uttered by a drunk or completely out of control person. It’s another matter when the interlocutor approaches this consciously. So, what caustic words can you respond to the words of a rude person?
    Your imagination and intelligence are so primitive that these insults don’t offend me at all. It’s amazing how easily you go about offending someone. Fate will do the same to you, you'll see.
In general, it is worth noting that most often boors deliberately try to provoke us to some kind of reaction. We often notice that someone else’s rudeness can arise completely out of nowhere, or the reason is so insignificant that an adequate person would not pay attention to it at all. It’s just that boors cannot deprive themselves of the opportunity to offend someone. Most often, in such cases, we are advised to ignore the attacks of an ill-wisher, and such recommendations are instilled in us from childhood. And yet, such advice, as a rule, has practically no effectiveness - in practice it often turns out that a person who has escaped punishment for his sabotage becomes even more impudent. If a boor is constantly ignored, then he subsequently becomes convinced that everything is allowed to him. Therefore, it is important to remember that we should never ignore the insults that sellers, administrators, cashiers and other random interlocutors “bestow” on us during their working hours. The most appropriate response to such behavior is to contact your superiors, whose task is to competently select personnel.

How to adequately respond to rudeness and rudeness

You may well get out of this situation gracefully if you calmly agree with the boor. This technique has a particularly disarming effect on some people. So, if someone is trying to insult your mental abilities or “take advantage” of your appearance, then half agree with these words, and then thank your opponent for taking the time to find your shortcomings. This method is very effective when spectators are present during its implementation. You will not insult the boor in return, but at the same time you will put him in an awkward position.

Many people are highly suspicious, and if you meet just such an instance on your way, then, of course, you can scare him with inevitable retribution “from above.” After the phrases below, the offender will remember the dialogue with you for a long time.
    There is no desire to respond to these insults. However, the day will come when you will understand that all the misfortunes have been acquired by you, starting from this day. It has already turned out that we are paying for everything in this life. Remember this day so that you know why God is punishing you. From now on, complete bad luck awaits you. I'm not scaring you, I just know about it.

How to intelligently send a person away without swearing

If you don’t want to swear in response to someone else’s unpleasant statements, but still think that you should fight back, then it’s quite possible to answer intelligently, but still put the person in his place.
    They say that behind insults a person usually hides his complexes and inadequacy. Think about it. It feels like insult is the only way you can assert yourself.

How to shut someone up with one beautiful phrase

Sometimes there is no desire to enter into a verbal altercation, and you want to shut the person up by uttering just one destructive remark. There are many such phrases, and they affect everyone differently. Here's an example:
    They say that when a person is not particularly intelligent, the only thing he can do is stoop to insults.

When he insults his superiors

In this case, unfortunately, we do not always have the opportunity to respond the way we want, so the smartest thing to do would be to simply walk away from the conflict. If we are talking not about the boss, but about a colleague, then there is also no need to escalate the situation - try to answer neutrally. This technique can also be useful at a time when your boss insults you: while the boss says unpleasant things to you, mentally imagine a small capricious child in his place. In your imagination, calm this baby down, pat him on the head, feed him milk porridge. This will make it much easier for you to listen to insults, and perhaps even your mood will not worsen. In addition, the boss will probably be able to appreciate your resilience.

“Buy an elephant” method

Many people remember a joke from childhood, when an opponent was asked to “buy an elephant,” thereby infuriating him and almost driving him into rage. You can do the same. To each barb, answer the same thing in a bored tone: “So?”, “And then that?”, “Really?” and in the same spirit. Undoubtedly, by the end of this monotonous conversation, the boor will experience a real decline in moral strength.

Improvisation

In a conversation with an insulter, try to use the effect of surprise, surprise and disarm him with this. For example, you may laugh out loud in response to unpleasant words, as if you had heard the funniest joke. You can also sneeze, noting: “Sorry, I’m just allergic to people like you.” In addition, you can smile good-naturedly and say: “Surely your parents are ashamed of your upbringing.” Try improvising!

If you understand that the insults addressed to you are completely unfair, and you guess that your opponent also suspects this, then you should shame him. How can this be done? The first thing you can do is use certain phrases. If the person insulting you is conscientious enough, then such words will be able to penetrate him.
    Never stoop to insults without properly understanding the situation. This doesn’t make you look good at all. I hope that the day will come when you will be ashamed of everything that was said. It’s strange that I had a much better opinion of you. I hope that you are just trying to look worse than you really are.
There is no doubt that the person trying to insult you simply wants to somehow assert himself or stand out. At the end of his monologue, you may well ask coldly: “Well, did you manage to assert yourself at my expense?” In general, when communicating with such a person, sincerely try to understand what his true goal is, what he wants to achieve with his words. At these moments, it is not so important what exactly your opponent tells you, but why he does it. If you cannot find an answer in a difficult situation, then at least try not to lead the matter to mutual insults and impulsive reactions. Do not play by the rules that they are trying to impose on you. It is also important to learn to calmly respond to any rudeness without “losing face” and your sense of dignity. Although it is difficult not to admit that cultural treatment rarely makes a strong impression on a boor. In the case when it comes to trolling or other provoking situations, the best thing you can do is ignore such a person.

Correct response to insults

    It happens that we want to respond, but you know in advance that any of your words simply will not have an effect on the offender. Of course, in this situation it is better not to waste words and energy, but simply to abruptly end the dialogue. It often happens that the person “attacking” you actually has nothing against you personally - he is just in a bad mood. In this case, it is enough to ask him the question: “Bad day?” An adequate person will not argue with this, and it is even possible that he will apologize. It is often better not to lead to retaliatory insults. Try to avoid this situation by asking your interlocutor what he told you. Pretend you didn't hear his words. It is quite possible that the person has already regretted what he said. If the “attack” continues, then, apparently, in front of you is a rare boor. During some dialogues, we are simply strangled by the desire to attack our interlocutor. And yet, be that as it may, it is very important not to get to this point - you will almost certainly regret it. Try to keep your mind calm. It will be ideal if you learn to retort with witty remarks and not show that the provocations offend you in any way. It is impossible not to mention one of the most common mistakes made by people who were forced to face insults. It's about making excuses. Often, having heard offensive words, we try to prove to our opponent that he is unfair to us. With such tactics, you will undoubtedly find yourself in a position of humiliation.

Insulted by a stranger

If a person is drunk or clearly out of his mind, then you should still ignore his words - just try not to notice him. If we are talking about a stranger who did not like something about your behavior, then try to understand the situation, and then act “according to the circumstances.”

Insulted by a loved one

Here it is important to immediately understand why the conflict situation occurred and what provoked it. It is better to prevent the spread of a further quarrel, and frankly tell your loved one that he offended you, and you are hurt by his words. Try not to hush up the conflict, but to talk openly, clarifying the matter. It happens that at moments when they try to offend us with insults, we frantically begin to scroll through possible responses in our thoughts. It becomes quite a shame if these efforts are in vain and a witty answer comes to our minds after the dialogue is over. Everyone knows the expression that “after a fight you don’t wave your fists,” so it is advisable to respond to your interlocutor’s caustic remarks in a timely manner. So, let's look at some similar phrases that can help us in a difficult conversation:
    I hate to interrupt you, but I have more important things to do. Are you finished? Should I answer politely or tell the truth?
Note that most often people who easily go to the extent of insulting their interlocutor, as a rule, do not have high intelligence, so smart answers often drive them into a stupor. What options can you use? Examples:
    I don’t know what your usual diet is, but this menu is clearly not particularly balanced, and contains harmful carcinogens - they are the ones who set about destroying your brain cells! Scientists have not yet fully studied the intellectual abilities of primates. Maybe you could leave your contacts, my friend, a researcher, will really need them. By the way, would you like to take part in a scientific experiment?
And yet, if possible, try not to respond to insults in the spirit of the insulter. Or at least don't become a conflict instigator! What kind of people tend to do this? The face of a provocateur
    A weak person who is actually a coward, and caustic words are his only defense. An energy vampire who tries to bring out the negative emotions of his interlocutor, thereby “feeding” himself. Boors without upbringing, who had to grow like “grass in a field.” Aggressors who find it difficult to live a day without taking part in some kind of scandal. Unsuccessful elements, like drug addicts and alcoholics, who find it difficult to control themselves. Just stupid people.
When you understand that an adequate and reasonable person will find a way to convey his message without swearing and insults, then it will be much easier for you to react to the antics of ordinary boors.

Each of us faces rudeness every day. In stores, in transport, on the street, in hospitals - everywhere there are people who can ruin your mood for the whole day.

Offend and Anyone can spoil a person's mood, especially born rude people. On their antics must be responded to correctly. TO you need to be prepared for this and know what to answer in order to save your nerves and get out of it with dignity the current situation.

Of course, there are situations when answering no offense worth it:

  • on insulting strangers store, transport or other public place do not worth paying attention. It is unlikely that anyone other than the police will be able to calm them down;
  • Not worth answering rudeness of strangers if they provoke a fight. True, if someone wants to fight, they won’t just let you go, but if there is a chance to avoid a fight, use it;
  • on rudeness can be encountered in on the Internet different forums or in the comments. Provoking people to I bet many people make money this way or simply stroke their ego. On rudeness in social networks are not costs answer to save time and nerves.

When we still have to answer, we we're upset that we don't managed to fight back correctly, and even if it seemed that you you answer adequately, after the fact you still receive phrases that fit better would. So as not to If you upset yourself, you can learn in advance to respond to the offender.

What a funny way to answer insult

Many people make the mistake of the insult is responded to with rudeness. Of course, when we are offended, it's annoying, but if you gather your strength and do not deign the boor with attention, you will definitely win the argument. No matter how it was difficult, make it clear that you do not care about the words of the person who is rude. Best option- respond to rudeness with humor.

If you have there will be witty phrases in stock, then You you can get out of any situation.



Immediately forget about the drums hung around the necks of the offenders, so that they lead the column of people going somewhere. This is an unconstructive reaction, albeit with a dose of sarcasm. When responding to an insult, it is better to use intellectual humor to show your superiority over the rude person:

  • "WITH At this moment I ask for more details...”;
  • "Like You’re good at coming up with nasty things”;
  • "I see you We spent the whole night preparing our speech”;
  • “Should we call an ambulance? You probably feel bad, since you started talking such nonsense”;
  • “I want to thank your parents for raising such a good person”;
  • “Thank God, you’re talking nonsense again! And I already thought that you were a smart person.”

If the insulter does not understands humor and continues to speak poorly in your side, try to correctly explain to the person in clever words that he behaves rudely. On clever phrases a rude person may not find a decent answer and will simply leave you behind. Don't shout and swear - quite politely and intelligently explain that someone wrong. Such composure will unsettle a boor.

How to exit with dignity such situations? There is a wise way. Agree with in the words of a rude man and thank you for what he I found your shortcomings. This method is very effective- you don’t even be rude in response, but you put the boor in awkward situation. Ill-mannered people need to be made clear that they are behaving ugly. On tactful remark they will react and think about it.

If someone emphasizes your appearance (blonde, bespectacled, fat), bring this feature to the fore and thank the interlocutor for his observation. “Yes, I’m blonde, we’ve been talking for an hour, and you just noticed!” It’s taking a long time to get to you!”, “Do I need to remind you that glasses have always been considered a sign of intelligence. That’s why I see that you don’t have glasses.”

Best answers to insults

Not on All insults can be answered with one memorized phrase. If you're boorish looks illiterate, then smart maxims will come in handy. Beautiful and correct answers to rudeness:

  • "Not I want to break away from such an interesting conversation, but I'm in a hurry";
  • "How to answer you so as not to offend";
  • “No, no, I always yawn when I’m interested in a conversation with my interlocutor”;
  • "You you know, a friend of mine is conducting an experiment on study of primate intelligence, you just need to get involved.”

To be ready for any insults, you need to know what a provocateur might look like. The face of a boor:

  • more often these are weak individuals who are trying to defend themselves with insults;
  • rude people - these are energy vampires who enjoy taking people out of myself;
  • Aggressive people who love to argue. This is they become a habit;
  • stupid people.

How to speak smartly answer to rudeness

To be ready to answer insults, learn a few smart phrases that may come in handy. True, keep in I see that there are not just smart words enough. You need to show the offender that you- a confident person, and it's hard to get you out of myself. Therefore, all words must be pronounced clearly, in a calm tone.

Examples of phrases that can be used in response to insults:

  • "Not it's worth being so angry, but That your eyes will now take on the color of your red blouse”;
  • "If you fools would fly I wouldn't be here now stood";
  • "Not I know your preferences in food, but products that you use in food, clearly reduce intelligence";
  • "It's easy for you to surprise me “just say something smart”;
  • “You probably haven’t been hugged enough in childhood, that's why you so angry. Let me I’ll hug you..."

Costs should I even respond to insults

Is it necessary to answer insults, you decide You. Keep in mind that the retaliatory insult in the address of loved ones can lead to that the relationship will be damaged. Therefore, in order not to allow a scandal to occur, try to defuse the situation on the contrary.

Do not forget that rude people are usually people offended by fate who simply cannot argue their opinion. Therefore, do not be rude yourself and do not respond to the antics of strangers.

And one more thing. When an insult comes to you, you decide how to react to it. But if someone is rude to people close to you - offends a girlfriend, mother, laughs at a brother or sister - then a reaction is needed. Again: there is no need to get involved in a fight, it is enough to simply show that you are intellectually superior to your interlocutor, and that the one at whom the rudeness was directed has a patron.

What to say in answer to rudeness of strangers

If a stranger is rude to you and you decided no matter what began to fight back, use the repetition method. On respond to the rude person’s words with the phrases: “What are you talking about!", "AND what's next? ","That's it? Is that all now? So are you get rid of it quickly unpleasant person.

Use the surprise method: when insulted, sneeze and say that you are allergic to rudeness. A In general, when strangers start to be rude, find out the reason for this behavior. If his insults are unfounded, let him know that and that they are unpleasant to you. In rare cases, of course, the offender is right, and the remarks hit the mark. In such cases, you will have to agree with the speaker, but reproach him for pointing out your shortcomings so rudely.

IN in most cases a person does not ready for that he might be offended. Not do you know what to answer? Just improvise. Behave yourself calmly, don't it's worth going with emotions about. Before you say anything, think about what might the interlocutor says the answer. When you learn to control your thoughts and emotions, you get out of it easily any situation.

Rudeness, vulgarity, swearing, insults and other unpleasant things are a widespread and depressing phenomenon, an ineradicable evil in the modern world.

Although most people strive to be polite, tactful and courteous to each other, there are times in life when when you just can’t get away from rudeness. The correct response to aggression from the outside can help not only curb the rude person, but also maintain your own self-esteem. Let's try to answer the question - how to respond to an insult funny and with sarcasm?

Rudeness and rudeness are common for a number of different reasons, ranging from the banal bad mood and ending with a whole list of personal characteristics. Mostly people are insolent and rude to others because:

  • Do not feel satisfied with life;
  • They have an inferiority complex, groundless arrogance and egocentrism;
  • They have a low level of culture and education;
  • They want to provoke someone to exchange insults due to their aggressive nature.

Unhappy, embittered, squeezed, but at the same time ambitious and vain people are the main generators of rudeness in society. Intentional neglect of others, the conflicting essence of character, primitive consciousness - all this can seriously ruin the life of balanced and well-mannered people.
How to respond to insults?

Let’s say the rude guy still doesn’t calm down and continues to throw his “opponent” out of balance. Under no circumstances should you stoop to his level and start a retaliatory tirade filled with sophisticated insults. How, then, to bring down a lover of insults?

Important! Rude - always weak and insecure person who is very afraid of being worse than others. This is an axiom that should always be kept in mind in the event of a verbal conflict.

Ignoring

Silence is not only golden, but also the most popular way to combat rudeness.

Demonstratively ignoring various impudent “rednecks” can only be effective in the case of absolute equanimity.

No touchy looks, tired sighs or similar reactions! For successfully ignoring insults it is necessary to show the rude person that he is an empty place.

Calm

If the previous tactics did not have the desired effect, and the stream of insults continues to spoil the mood of those around you, then during the “conversation” with rude people you need to try to maintain self-control and not show your confusion.

A frank and firm position expressed in a calm and confident tone, often acts on the “bazaar boor” like cold water. Being energy vampires at their core, brawlers draw inspiration from weak, pliable and nervous people. Icy calmness drives the rude person into a stupor, because he expects the opposite reaction.

You for me, I for you

You can use the method of transferring the interlocutor’s negativity onto himself. No matter what he says, complete agreement with his remarks and gratitude for identifying “shortcomings” will incapacitate the rude person. He expects sharp disagreement with his attacks, how can this be?!

However, calm phrases like “thank you for the valuable advice,” “I’ll take note,” and other similar options can silence the source of insults. This method works best in public, because the rude person is unlikely to receive any support from the outside, and may even be laughed at.

Sneeze

If ignoring it does not help, and the boor continues to spew insulting remarks, you can allow him to do this until he believes that he is right.

And then sneeze, pause and say: “Sorry, I’m allergic to such nonsense.”

Similar replica will cause confusion, and can reduce the flow of insults to nothing.

What to do if a loved one or colleague is rude?

A stranger who decides to assert himself through insults at someone else's expense does not deserve attention and deserves only to be ignored. But in the case of people who make up a constant social circle, this method won't work. Therefore, rudeness coming from relatives and friends must be dealt with immediately and all inconvenient topics must be clarified.

Another thing is people who, by the will of fate, are colleagues (classmates, fellow students, regular visitors to some establishments).

Important! Carefully avoiding the exchange of insults is the first step that almost every sane person takes.

If silent ignoring only provokes the rude person, then you can imagine him in the form of a capricious little child, attracting attention to himself in various ways. boorish phrases. After all, no one will take seriously a child who is rude but not aware of his behavior?

Thus, ignoring will help not only to gain protection from all kinds of insults, but also to improve your own mood. Moreover, the rude person will one way or another notice the demonstrated persistence, which can subsequently have a positive effect on his behavior.

And yet, silent ignorance does not always lead to successful resolution of the conflict. Sometimes it's worth gather your courage and retort to the rude man. The phrases “Who allowed you to talk to people like that?”, as well as “You will talk in this tone with your wife/husband” are quite suitable for this. Most often, such remarks are enough to indicate to the rude person who is who.

When is it better to ignore insults?

Resisting rude people is sometimes an obviously pointless exercise.

Provocations staged on the streets, in shops and other public places are best simply ignored.

In principle, a person cannot be liked by everyone, so the most winning move in such a situation is demonstrative ignoring.

In addition, there is a risk of meeting unstable and inadequate rude people. When their meager vocabulary is exhausted, they can easily move on from simple insults to physical violence. In order not to get hurt in a fight, it is best not to enter into any conversations with such rude people and retreat from the “battlefield” with dignity.
How to respond to insults?

Respond nicely to insults

Polite communication discourages rude people because they do not expect such an unusual reaction. For example, the phrase “Dear, I’m not going to talk to you in that tone” or “Dear, you’ve probably confused me with someone else” can cool boorish ardor.

Other similar remarks demonstrating good manners and education: “Rudeness does not make you look good,” “Thank you for showing interest in me,” “Don’t be upset, you will still succeed.”

If this doesn’t work, the best thing to do is say goodbye to the “interlocutor” and leave.

Smart responses to insults

You can ask leading questions that the rude person most likely will not be able to answer. The best variations of similar phrases: “Why do you want to hurt me?”, “What do you really want from me?”, “Which answer suits you, polite or truthful?” etc.

Witty answers

Those with a sharp mind can build a good line of behavior with ill-mannered people.

By responding to criticism with various funny remarks, you can not only beautifully put a person in his place, but also cause general laughter under certain circumstances.

They do this task well next lines: “Didn’t you scare Babayka as a child?”, “I’m not interested in what you think about me, but I’m glad that you can think”, “Go and vacuum the desert!”, “My biggest drawback is the inability to communicate with rude people ", "Do I look like a dentist? Then please close your mouth."

Timidity and shyness are real food for quarrelsome and scandalous individuals, and ignoring them cannot always improve the situation. It is worth remembering this and at the right moments overcoming yourself, giving a worthy rebuff to various manifestations of human baseness.

This is one of the first desires that arises after an insult. But a retaliatory attack is appropriate only if it:

  • witty;
  • happens among family or friends;
  • defuses the situation rather than aggravates the conflict.

In all other cases, even if you consider yourself a wit worse than Oscar Wilde, responding to insult with insult is not the best way. This way you stoop to the level of your boorish opponent and make it clear that his words hurt you, that is, there may be some truth in them.

2. Make a joke

The difference between a witty insult and a humorous response is that in the latter case, you are making fun of the situation itself. The advantages of this strategy are obvious: the insult loses its toxicity, tension, and the audience (if there is one) takes your side.

In this case, you can also take a pseudo-self-deprecating position. This will confuse your opponent and disguise the sarcasm.

Example 1: A colleague says you prepared an ugly presentation.

Answer: “Perhaps you are right. Next time I won’t ask my five-year-old son for help.”

Example 2: A stranger calls you names.

Answer: “Thank you, this is very valuable information. You opened my eyes to my shortcomings. There will be something to think about over lunch.”

3. Accept

In some cases, it is really worth analyzing words that seem offensive to you. Especially if they come from people close and respected by you. In this case, take their remarks not as an insult, but as criticism that can make you better.

It would be a good idea to think about people's motives and find out what exactly made them use harsh language. Perhaps this is a violent reaction to your less than angelic behavior.

4. Respond to intent, not words.

Any insult always has a hidden purpose. Make the secret obvious: designate it.

For example, in response to rude words, say, “Wow! Something really serious happened between us, since you decided to hurt me.”

So, on the one hand, you can unsettle your opponent, and on the other, find out the reason for his negative attitude.

5. Stay calm

If the insult comes not from a loved one, but from a colleague, acquaintance, or even a stranger, never show that the words hurt you. Most likely, behind them lies uncertainty, dissatisfaction with one’s own life and a desire to simply take it out on you. Don't let the trick work, react calmly and with a smile.

If necessary, continue to pursue your line: ask what exactly caused such a reaction in the person, without paying attention to his words.

6. Ignore

Often the best answer is no answer. If we are talking about Internet trolls, you can simply not respond to their comments or send boors to. Well, “offline” you can always let the insult fall on deaf ears or walk away. You have every right to do this.

An example from ancient Roman history... One day, in a public bath, someone hit the politician Cato. When the offender came to apologize, Cato replied: “I don’t remember the blow.”

This phrase can be interpreted as follows: “You are so insignificant that I not only do not care about your apology, but I did not even notice the insult itself.”

7. Use the law

You can hold the offender accountable, or at least threaten him with it. Punishment for insult is prescribed in the Code of Administrative Offences, but libel is already within the scope of criminal law. If you are insulted by your boss, you can contact the HR department.

The main thing is to remember: no one has the right to infringe on your honor, dignity and reputation. But you must answer people in the same way. Otherwise, any recommendations are meaningless.



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