When a person feels bad, what should he do? What to do when you feel really bad

Our mood is very changeable. Sometimes we ourselves cannot say exactly why we suddenly feel sad. First of all, you need to figure out what made you sad, and then remember all the actions that you need to do when you feel bad.

Unfortunately, not all days of our lives are successful. Sometimes it seems as if the world has turned its back on you, and as luck would have it, everything turns out completely differently than you wanted. In such cases, we always think that we simply got up on the wrong foot in the morning. Although the reasons for apathy and bad mood can be completely different. I can say for sure - one of them is idleness. Think about it and you will agree with me. Sometimes you sit at home, stare blankly at the monitor, and nothing makes you happy. You go and lie down on the sofa, trying to sleep. It doesn't work. You get up and begin to depict a “pendulum”, i.e. you walk from corner to corner, not knowing what to do with yourself.

Stop! This shouldn't happen. Remember the good children's “Tale of Lost Time.” You don't want to waste precious minutes of your life, do you? Of course not. In this case, let’s start talking about what to do when you feel bad.

  • Think positive.

Often we become fixated on our apathy and sink deeper and deeper into it. Not worth it stir up the situation with bad thoughts and bad feelings. Remember some of the most pleasant moments in your life, and in the smallest detail, as if you are living it again. It could be anything: the first kiss, the birth of a sister or brother, your birthday or a vacation at sea.

With happy memories and positive thoughts, a good mood will return by itself.

  • Smile.

If you are overcome by melancholy and bad thoughts, then go to the mirror and smile at your reflection. Do you agree that looking at such a beauty, the mood simply cannot remain bad?

  • Appreciate what you have.

Sometimes people, because of their selfishness, become so demanding of themselves and others that don't value what they have, and everyone dreams of some unconquered peaks. No, dreaming is, of course, good, but we must not forget about reality. Agree, sometimes you ignore or even offend a loved one, thinking that you would gladly exchange communication with him now for communication with a certain “person from your dreams.” It happens that we lose someone’s friendship or love without giving it any special meaning, and we realize it’s too late, when nothing can be returned. This happens not only in relation to people.

For example, you have been waiting for summer and warmth for so long, and now it has come. However, you had some problems that occupied everyone’s thoughts. What's the end result? Missed sunny days and regret that you “didn’t see summer” and didn’t have time to enjoy it. Don't forget that a bird in the hand is better than a pie in the sky. In other words, it is better to enjoy the present than to dream about the future, otherwise your whole life will turn into just an eternal dream about something vague.

  • Learn to enjoy the little things.

With the advent of comfort in our lives, human needs have also changed.

People are corny stopped enjoying little things. But it is from them that our whole life consists.

So finally look around and make sure that the world is beautiful! You don't have to go far to do this, just look out the window. What do you see? Sun? Great - it will warm you up. Rain? It’s also not bad - it will water the earth. Thunderstorm? Great - the air will be filled with ozone, in other words, freshness. Wind? Great - it will clear your mind. In the end, of course, I joked a little. But in general this is how it is.

Sometimes it happens that you don’t know the reason for your melancholy and what to do when you feel bad. Here are some truly effective ways to dispel sadness.

  • Call your friend.

Just choose a friend who is always positive. No, I understand that you don’t choose girlfriends, but if you have several of them, then still follow my advice. Maybe your best friend is not a very cheerful person by nature. And now you only need POSITIVE, and not boring complaints about another disadvantaged fate.

  • Run to spend money!

This, in my opinion, is the most effective way to completely get rid of a bad mood. After all, this is a kind of medicine for women, and I absolutely don’t understand people who don’t like shopping.

  • Read your favorite book or watch an old movie.

Take out your favorite blanket from the bins of your Motherland, take a book (which you’ve read 100 times, but still like it) or the TV remote control, get comfortable in your chair and start getting high. It’s not often now that you get to truly relax: there are always some problems and endless things to do. Take time for yourself and what you love.

  • Go in for sports or at least cleaning.

Yes, I understand, the phrase sounds scary - go in for sports. I will say this: if you are not a sporty person by nature (which is most likely the case), then at least make a “swallow” on the balcony or a “birch tree” on the sofa. Okay, let's leave my dreams of sports. Remember that movement is life and go get a rag and a bucket. Clean your apartment or room until it shines, and then in such cleanliness you yourself will simply be ashamed to grieve.

  • Treat yourself to some tasty treats.

Forget about calories for a while. Buy your favorite cake or chocolate. Keep in mind that this is not just my advice “from my head”, but scientists think so. Therefore, listen to the priority opinion of serious guys.

If you feel bad because of someone

Often we suffer and cannot find a place for ourselves because of a certain person. There may be several reasons for this (quarrel, separation, unwillingness to forget, etc.). Let's figure it out.

  • Let go of the past, love the present and look forward to the future.

Sometimes we don’t know what to do when we feel bad at heart because of the need to forget a person dear to our hearts and simply erase his image from memory. However, if there is no other way out, then you need to go through this pain. You may have to forget your ex-lover or come to terms with your best friend leaving for another city - it doesn’t matter, the main thing is that at first it’s not at all easy to do.

Remember all the good things that connected you with this person, then forcefully convince yourself that you cannot change what has already happened, only after that try to reconcile yourself and accept everything as it is.

Think about the fact that in the future you will find a lot of new acquaintances and meetings with different people, some of whom may someday become family to you.

  • Ask for forgiveness.

If the reason for your sadness lies in a quarrel with someone close to you, and you are to blame, then hurry to apologize. Think that time is running out, and each of you is overcome by constant thoughts about each other, you are both nervous. So why is all this necessary? Keep in mind that nerve cells do not regenerate, so act immediately. After all, a real person There is no shame in asking for forgiveness. But you are a REAL person? ;)

  • Let it go.

Sometimes it happens that you get hung up on some problem or cannot find a way out of a certain situation, and then thoughts about it become obsessive. Relax, remember the wise phrase that there are no hopeless situations and give yourself at least a day of “breathing”. Tell yourself and your problem: “I’ll think about it tomorrow.”

  • Change the scenery.

If you feel bad, maybe it's because you're tired. Try a change of scenery. There is no need to leave the city if this is not possible. Stay with your grandmother, aunt, or friend for a couple of days. This will definitely help. During this time, you will have time to miss your native walls and return home absolutely happy.

Know how to fight bad moods, sad thoughts and adjust yourself only positive!

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Video: When you're sad. How to cheer yourself up

Attention, TODAY only!

Instructions

Find the cause of the unwanted condition. Determine whether it has developed into depression. To do this, familiarize yourself with its main features. These include: problems sleeping, lack of appetite, tiredness immediately after waking up in the morning and loss of interest in life. You can also talk about depression if you find it difficult to do ordinary things and have a hard time making decisions. All this gives cause for concern. Depression is a serious illness and has no age restrictions.

If these signs are not present, most likely the problem can be solved. After its elimination, the heaviness on soul will disappear. To remove the cause of your bad mood, try to pinpoint it and write down your reasoning. Most likely, the problem lies in your point of view. Try to look at the situation from the outside and realize that there is another view that you may not even be aware of.

Act if you realize real guilt. If, as a result of reasoning, you understand that you made a mistake, you should admit and correct it, even if a lot of time has passed. Give yourself a chance to take the weight off your soul. Don't be afraid to be misunderstood and act as quickly as possible.

Smile more often. A smile and sincere laughter relieve even severe stress. If someone offended you, calm down and take care of yourself. Spend more time walking outdoors. Do something fun, but don't overload yourself.

Learn to communicate. Make an appointment with friends you haven't seen for a long time. Choose general, uplifting, interesting topics, give appropriate compliments and know how to accept them correctly. Listen carefully to your interlocutor. Let him have the best impressions of you.

Sources:

  • if your heart is heavy

There are moments in every person's life when... soul It's really bad and nothing can be done about it. Then you give up, and it begins to seem that life has no meaning. But this must be fought.

Instructions

All people are different in appearance and perception. For some, the problem that arises passes quickly and by, but for others it touches the soul and worries. Everything begins to fall out of hand, constant screams and breakdowns towards loved ones and dear people. As a result, relationships become bad, and sometimes even worse. And then it begins to seem that everything is set only against you. This makes you even more angry, aggressiveness and uncertainty appear. And while some are ruining themselves, others are living calmly and enjoying life.

Even if you have some tragic event in your family, problems with work, your personal life is not going well, etc., you should not always reproach yourself for something. This is a life that brings more than just good moments. Learn to rejoice in what is now, and not what once was or will be. Everything in life comes and goes. All the negativity will also pass someday.

The main thing is not to sit still, but move forward, overcoming all the difficulties along the way. Do what interests you and gives you pleasure. Take a break and make other people feel good, but under no circumstances take it out on them. Life is too short, sometimes there is not even enough time to correct your mistakes.

If on soul bad, then give someone joy. Go outside and give a small child some candy. You will see how much sincere happiness comes from one little sweetness. It will become much easier for you. If you love shopping, then go and buy yourself a new thing. If you can't live without Japanese food, then treat yourself to a trip to a restaurant. Problems and adversity will sooner or later go away or be forgotten. Look for pleasant moments in every day and minute. Just live for yourself, for the sake of your loved ones. Difficulties make people stronger, more experienced and wiser. If you offended someone, then ask for forgiveness. Fix minor mistakes that you can fix now. Don't put it off until later, because... it may no longer exist.

And finally, lie down on the sofa, turn on good and favorite music, analyze your life. Understand what is stopping you and fix it. Remove the burden from your soul. If you don't do this, you may regret it for the rest of your life. And give people joy and happiness. And everything will definitely come back to you.

Useful advice

Learn to enjoy the little things.

Sources:

  • bad at heart

In every life situation, people experience different emotions: joy, sadness or complete indifference. “The soul sings” when a person is busy doing what he loves, and “cats scratch at the soul” if anxiety and fear persist. How to find the right words to express your feelings?

Instructions

“Cats scratch at the soul” in situations that cause doubt and anxiety. Usually people say this when a state of anxiety lasts for a long time and does not go away. A person cannot find a place for himself; he is torn apart by contradictions. He doubts the favorable outcome of an important matter. If you feel sad and ill, it is your soul that is showing excitement. As a rule, in such cases, the uncertainty itself and the expectation of unpleasant news are more frightening.

“I feel relieved” is a pleasant feeling of joy and a feeling of calm. When a controversial problem is finally resolved, a person experiences extraordinary lightness. You have found a way out of a difficult situation and are freed from the burden of worries and problems. When the long-awaited news for you turns out to be good and positive, then your soul breathes a sigh of relief along with you. Anxiety and fear disappear, and are replaced by pleasant certainty and calmness.

A “feeling of emptiness” occurs in cases of great emotional fatigue. If you have been dissatisfied for a long time and eventually have to come to terms with an unpleasant situation, disappointment sets in. Your soul needs to experience positive emotions and arouse interest in life events. It is interesting that in cases where global plans are being implemented and long-standing dreams come true, a person may also experience a similar state. Previously set goals could inspire him to work hard. However, after the joy of achieving them, the same emptiness arises, and the need for new challenges and achievements appears. When you experience emptiness, it means that your soul needs a break from the intensity of passions. Joy and enthusiasm will come later.

“The soul sings” when a person is busy doing what he loves and is satisfied with the development of events. If your business is going like clockwork and you enjoy every day you live, then you can safely be called a happy person. You pay attention to every little detail in everyday life. You will be delighted by the singing of birds and a beautiful sunset, surprised by the endless starry sky and the harsh rumble of thunder. The soul enjoys its stay in this fairy-tale world. In such a state of mind, a person, as a rule, really enjoys “humming to himself.”

“Flight of the soul” is a feeling of an extraordinary surge of strength. In such a state, it seems to a person that he is ready to “move mountains” and can work without sleep or rest. Or a feeling of a completely new reality may arise. People in love perceive the entire world around them in pink. All people seem to them to be kind, and problems are insignificant. They seem to float in the air, rising in their feelings above the general routine. This state is also inherent in creative people who are passionate about a new idea or grandiose plans. When they make discoveries, they seem to be in another dimension, and their inspiration and efficiency simply have no limits. When you are in love, and the power of intention works wonders, it means your soul “flies with joy.”

"He's as cold as ice!" - this is what they usually say about a callous, indifferent person who does not show emotions. But coldness can be both real (due to selfishness, arrogance) and imaginary, for example, due to shyness, when a person finds it difficult to communicate with other people. However, in any case, it would not hurt such a person to be more sensitive and emotional.

A “stone” in the soul is not a simple depression caused by a light bulb. This means that there are unfinished problems in life, and thoughts are painful and confused. There seems to be no one to put the burden of your problems on; you have to solve everything yourself, and what exactly to do with everything that has piled up is unknown.

And when the very peak of bad luck comes, everything is bad, there is emptiness in the soul, and one gives up, only then does that same depression begin. If you are already in this state, then let’s dig in - what went wrong?

Procrastination is a difficult word, but its essence is familiar to almost every person. Psychologists use this word to mean putting things off “until tomorrow.” This “tomorrow”, again, is postponed to an indefinite day, and meanwhile other unfinished tasks are collected in a huge lump.

No, this is not simple laziness when a person just wants to relax and gain strength. This is a burden of problems that need to be dealt with urgently, so rest is out of the question. But other things cannot wait, and they are all just as urgent. As a result, everything is done in haste at the last minute and it’s a bummer.

The result is that the result did not bring joy, the chance of victory was missed, and hence moral devastation. To prevent this from happening, here are some tips:

    If you get down to business, try to do it right away. Well, as a last resort, take a short time out for inspiration.

    Don't take on everything at once, doing everything halfway. It is better to abstract from other problems, but focus on the most important.

    Don't make promises to everyone to look good. It’s better to refuse once and remain honest than to promise, fail to deliver, and then hide.

    If you are overdue, find out if there is still a chance to catch up. If there is, do everything immediately; if not, forget about it.

    Don't mope over what you missed. This is a lesson for you - either you are trying to burden yourself with something beyond your strength, or the process itself is unpleasant for you, and therefore unnecessary.

Procrastination is dangerous when it comes to personal health or the health of loved ones. These problems definitely cannot be put off. And everything else is nonsense: work, household chores and other little things. So they weren't that important if they could be put off.

Therefore, the emptiness in your soul is just time to think about new plans. Like a space on a keyboard between words: finished one word - “space” - start another. Just don’t repeat your mistakes, at least make a clear schedule.

Almost all people are afraid of losing the property they own. The fear is almost obsessive. They think that if they lose everything, there will not only be emptiness in their souls, but life will lose all meaning.

Nowadays the path to getting rich is too easy. Take out loans, a mortgage - here you have housing, a car and a house full of all the benefits. But as soon as you lose a prestigious job, everything goes topsy-turvy:

    The apartment and car are taken away for non-payment.

    All the gold remained in the pawnshop.

    Loans are stifling, collecting interest.

An emptiness in your pocket is an emptiness in your soul; no one can help, because even friends have defected to the side of more successful friends.

Unfortunately, the burden of such problems is felt by the vast population of our country. They lured everyone in with too sweet a candy, without explaining how bitter it was inside. And only a few look at everything with optimism:

    We didn’t live richly - and there was no need to start. Again, a rented apartment - and I don’t care. A mortgage is the same as renting, only much more expensive.

    Thank you to fate for helping me get rid of false “friends”. Now it’s clear who is who. True friends remained close even in poverty.

    The loans will go away and be forgotten. And fate gave me a chance to start living from scratch and pointed out past mistakes.

    The main thing is that the key phrase here is “start living.” And therefore, everything is just beginning, and it’s time to fill this emptiness in the soul with something new and good.

If you don’t look at everything with optimism, you will mentally kill yourself and your family. But in such a situation, you need at least one person who will pull all those suffering up, and not down. And it will be better if you turn out to be such a person.

In general, we need to look at all these problems philosophically: “Thank you, God, for taking me with money. All my relatives are alive and well, and that’s the main thing!”




Changes in your personal life - and not for the better

This is where the spiritual emptiness is difficult to close. Only doctor time can heal. Although in some cases all is not lost.

My husband left me

Such sad changes in the family throw a woman off balance for a long time. Especially when a homewrecker appears on the way. First there are hysterics, threats, belittlement, and then - depression, emptiness, heaviness in the soul.

But how many times have such gulens returned home guilty? How many times has it happened that women have already “boiled over” and no longer want to let their spouses in the door? And how many times have women fallen in love in a new way, and she no longer needed this old womanizer!

Therefore, if your husband is now lost, and you can’t find a place for yourself, know that he is actually still alive. There are many options for returning him to his family, and one option is that you no longer need him.

Or maybe you are to blame for something? Maybe there is a chance to fix something? Maybe there is no homewrecker? Then don't put it off until tomorrow - dry your tears and act today.




Losing a loved one

This is where things get more complicated. For example, my mother passed away. You have already cried all your tears, the terrible days of all the farewell ceremonies have passed, and you have gone into deep depression. You look at one point, you don’t want to communicate with anyone, even though you are incredibly lonely.

For now, time is working to heal you psychologically. Nothing is needed yet. Unobtrusive care from family and friends is good. The main thing is that they don’t jerk you now in order to “knock the depressive crap out of your head.” This is not nonsense, this is how it should be.

The best way out is to communicate with someone who has already gone through a similar stage. Only he will help calm you down and explain how best to get out of depression. It is in him that there will be trust. Just don't get hooked by some sect.




I hear apathetic ringing, but I don’t know where it is

The worst thing is to succumb to depression when you are trying to make yourself feel worse. I want to cry, but there seems to be no reason. Some kind of melancholy, nothing more. It either swirls in the stomach area or gives off pain in the heart, but you don’t understand: is this a premonition of something bad?

Yes, there is fear for the future - you are expecting something, but you have convinced yourself in advance that the outcome must necessarily be bad. This is the mistake many people make. Moreover, the roots of this behavior sprout from childhood.

If you grew up in some kind of inevitable fear from childhood (there was violence and tyranny in the family), then such an oppressive state will always accompany you. It is called the persecuting and punishing superego. Moreover, if what scares you does happen, then you will only have yourself to blame for it.

If your condition is already close to the point where only a bear’s bed can save you, then read the article. Maybe this is where your depression lurks, even to the point of health problems. But if you are still able to move and work, then a few tips will not hurt you:

    Don't beat yourself up over stupid things. Like, I had a bad dream or the fortune teller guessed something. A dream is just a reflection of our thoughts, which is why this “scenario” develops. But a fortune teller needs to earn money, so he prophesies all sorts of nonsense.

    Surround yourself with positivity. If you want chocolate, but if you want, let’s sabant with your friends. Watch comedies on TV, switch to thrillers and don't watch politics.

    Don't put your problems on others if they are incompetent to do so. Lawyers and doctors are one thing, amateurs who promise but don’t deliver are another.

    Think only about a good outcome. And for this, act yourself, if it is in your power. And again, don’t put anything off.

In general, you can easily get rid of the feeling of heaviness in your soul with the help of some sedative medications. And they cannot be excluded either. Calmed my nerves - cleared my head for good thoughts - and there will be so many solutions at once to throw off a heavy mountain of problems from your shoulders!


We all want to be happy, to experience joy. But this does not mean that life will always be cloudless. If a person is alive, sadness will inevitably come his way. And the more he loves life, the deeper his feelings for other people, the harder these moments turn out to be for him. There is sadness that comes and leaves a person without lingering. Sometimes suffering is caused by reasons that cannot be forgotten for the rest of your life. For example, in adolescence, parting with your first love can be very acute and painful.

But, after several months or years, it is usually remembered with a smile. Such memories are more like a slight sadness for a past childhood. However, for example, losing a child is a loss that remains until the end of days. The methods of working with different types of mental anguish differ from each other. What to do if your soul is very heavy? How can we relate to our state of mind in different situations?

Bereavement: Accepting Your Feelings

Melancholy always remains melancholy. You cannot get rid of it by simply trying to rationalize what is happening. When your heart is heavy and you want to cry, you can’t hide it. However, even if a person is in a state of deep sadness, this does not mean that he is prohibited from experiencing joy. In fact, sadness comes in order to be accepted - and even while experiencing this feeling, it is possible to experience a more meaningful feeling of joy. Not momentary pleasure or laughter, but a deeper sense of gratitude for life.

Instead of running from sadness or trying to disguise it, it is better to listen to this feeling and accept it. Longing and sadness mean that life once provided you with a gift; and now, having lost it, you understand how valuable it was, how worth it was to be part of your existence for some time. It could be a relationship with another person, or a living being that was important to you, or anything else - this gift was so precious that in its absence a deep sadness is born in the soul. Moreover, it was provided to you in a world where no one has any guarantees about their present and future.

Imagine a world without such gifts. Every human life would then be a complete tragedy. “It is better to lose love than not to burn with love at all,” you will probably agree with this Shakespearean quote.
All things in our world, including sadness, have a dual nature. The philosophers of antiquity knew about this. Make sure you see more than just the dark side of your feelings. For the gift that fate has given you, you should thank it.

If sadness occurs for other reasons

But often the state of sadness arises for other reasons related to certain events. Sometimes it happens that it is not clear why exactly your soul is heavy. This happens in two cases: either when a person cannot independently determine what exactly causes melancholy and sadness, or when so many problems accumulate in life that it becomes impossible to identify the true cause.

In both cases, you can use an approach that allows you to gradually solve the existing difficulties. For example, you may be overwhelmed by the overwhelming amount of work that needs to be completed within a certain time frame; due to real or imaginary shortcomings of your figure; due to a recent job loss or separation from a significant other.

If it is impossible to determine which of these factors caused depression, you need to gradually begin to work on all these areas: go to the gym, finally start doing work, post your resume on the Internet (or a profile on a dating site).

Of course, this approach will seem obvious. But it’s not so easy to take concrete steps in reality, when your soul is very heavy and the future seems hopeless. If a person manages to overcome himself and begin to work on at least some problems, this will already help to alleviate his condition.

What if the sadness doesn't go away quickly?

If sadness has settled in your soul, it is not easy to cope with this condition, even as an adult and morally mature person. Each of us periodically craves attention from others, care and support. Especially if the state of melancholy has settled in the heart for a long time. Therefore, if you have friends or acquaintances who can support you, do not neglect this support. If this is not possible, then you will have to take on this role yourself. Unfortunately, many adults - especially residents of megacities - even with a vibrant social life, can find themselves completely alone.

Of course, in this case it is also necessary to treat your feelings with understanding. Try, if possible, to treat your “inner child” as carefully as possible, as psychologists sometimes conventionally designate the emotional component. There are a few simple techniques you can try to do this.

  • First, think about those people in whose presence you felt protected. This could be parents, grandparents. Look at yourself through their loving eyes. Feel the warmth emanating from them. Feel their love, which is not dependent on your achievements or mistakes you have made - it truly is unconditional. Ask yourself a question: do they want (or would they like, if they are no longer alive) for their child or grandchild to suffer like this now?
  • Secondly, in order to make up for the lack of emotional energy, it would be useful to turn to your higher self. You can also find a lot of useful information about this concept. Let's say briefly - the higher “I” is a kind of ideal of a person, the model that he, consciously or unconsciously, strives to become. This is an imaginary copy of a person who already has all the qualities and skills necessary for a successful and happy life. Sometimes a parallel is drawn between the higher self and a person’s guardian angel in the Christian tradition. In moments of difficulty and despair, remember this ideal.

    To reconnect with him and get the energy you need, swipe. Sit in a comfortable position, relax. Imagine the higher “I” - yourself, who managed to overcome all the difficulties and develop the necessary volitional and emotional qualities. Feel how strong this person is, how many wonderful talents he has. Then imagine yourself connecting with this copy, becoming one with it.

  • The third technique will help calm the inner child. No matter how old a person is - thirty or fifty - there will always be a small child living inside him, still demanding love and attention. To give it the heat it needs, you can do the following. Make a bundle out of any clothes you own so that it is the size of a baby in diapers. Take him in your arms. Now clearly imagine that you have a real child in your arms. This child is you. Visualize the baby's face clearly. Then tell your child how much you love him. Reassure him that you will never leave him. Then you can play with him, or continue to lull him to sleep.
In addition to these techniques, it is also necessary to continue to work on the actual difficulties. If, for example, you are burdened by the imperfect parameters of your physical form, the very fact of visiting the gym will help eliminate negative emotions. After all, the mind sends them as a signal for a person to start working on current circumstances. When he begins to do this work, negative experiences become unnecessary.

Sometimes the best way out, when your heart is very heavy, can be to contact a specialist. In our country, unfortunately, working with a psychologist is not yet a common enough way to help yourself. Often, not without reason, people do not want to trust psychologists. After all, many of them tend to evaluate people in a stereotyped way, assigning them to one category or another and not paying due attention to the individual characteristics of the situation. Therefore, it may take time to find “your” psychologist with the proper experience and good professional intuition.

However, in the future these efforts will pay off handsomely. After all, difficulties, including psychological ones, are not resolved on their own. And knowledge of everyday psychology is of very little practical use - otherwise everyone who believes that they will “solve their problems themselves” would have been successful and happy long ago.

In any case, anyone who experiences sadness should treat themselves and their feelings with due patience. Accept help from loved ones and friends. Don't forget to praise yourself even for things that may seem insignificant or taken for granted. This will help bring about speedy emotional and spiritual healing.

If your heart is heavy, what should you do?

As always, on Fridays, our communication is devoted to questions and answers. And the first question that I want to answer, and which we will consider today, is the following question. This question worries many people today. A person has a heavy heart and the question arises: “What to do?”

first you need to find out the reason for this heaviness in your soul.

This is a question people ask very often. Before answering this question, why the soul is heavy and what to do, you must first find out the cause of this heaviness. You yourself understand that a person’s soul can be heavy for a variety of reasons - because of some everyday problems, family troubles, etc. Therefore, if we simply say, in general terms, that if your soul is heavy, then pray to God, then in this way we will not tell the person anything specific. This is not very specific, it will be said very abstractly.

I think that every person, if his soul is heavy, then he himself knows the reason why, and why his soul is heavy. And, probably, it is in connection with this specific problem that he wants to receive some specific answer. Therefore, I repeat once again that you first need to find out the reason for this heaviness in the soul.

The reasons for heaviness in the soul may be as follows. This is not to say that everyone can have one reason. When people say: “I have a heavy heart,” what is meant most of all is some kind of moral heaviness. The severity of the pressure of a person's conscience. A person suffers, and I would even say, righteously suffers, but, nevertheless, he suffers.

I want to emphasize. It seems that there should be no righteous torment. But if it is our conscience that torments us, then this is good, righteous torment. Therefore, one of the reasons why a person’s soul is heavy may be a moral burden, a feeling of guilt for some sin committed by a person against another person.

Someone may have been offended or insulted, or deceived... Maybe he lost heart at some point, and did not stand up for the truth, fearing to be subject to oppression or persecution. It happens that the husband cheated on his wife or the wife cheated on her husband.

If such a heaviness appears in a person’s heart, then it is most likely that he or she committed such an act for the first time, or cheated on each other. When this is done systematically, there is no longer any heaviness felt, there is no longer remorse, there is already joy and joyful memories. Sorry for saying this, but for a carnal man this is truly joy, and he does not feel any burden of guilt for the sin he has committed!?

The reason for such moral heaviness may be the betrayal of a friend. In a fit of some thoughtlessness, the man betrayed his friend, did not protect him, did not support him at the right moment, although he should have done this. It happens that a person did not extend a helping hand to some person, friend, relative or brother in faith... And then this person suffers for such an act.

And sometimes it’s hard on the soul, because there is a bank loan hanging over your head. And the same torments overcome a person. There can be many reasons.

Having summarized what I just said, I want to focus your attention on the fact that one of the main reasons that creates heaviness in the soul is the feeling of heaviness from blaming our conscience for committing some sin or unworthy act. Those. we have done something bad in life. Somewhere they stumbled, somewhere they offended, somewhere they said something, somewhere they didn’t support someone, someone may have been betrayed. What to do in this case?

If the heaviness in the soul is associated with the condemnation of conscience, then it is necessary to respond to the voice of conscience.

If the heaviness in the soul is associated with condemnation of conscience, i.e. This person is experiencing a moral burden, and this, one might say, is the main reason for the heaviness in the soul, then it is necessary to respond to the voice of conscience.

It is necessary to ask for forgiveness for what you have done, and to compensate as much as possible for the losses caused, both moral and material. Why do I say that you need to respond to this voice of conscience. Our conscience judges us, our souls feel heavy because of this, but I do not take a step towards my conscience in order to remove this feeling of discomfort from my soul.

As long as I resist the voice of conscience, until I take a step towards meeting my conscience for reconciliation, to eliminate this evil, then how long will I walk in unrepentance, how long will I drag my feet and not go for reconciliation, I will not ask forgiveness, I will not try to compensate for the losses, for so long my soul will feel heavy.

As long as I drag my feet and refuse to reconcile, the heaviness will remain in my soul.

Those. what needs to be done? All we have to do is respond to the voice of conscience, go to the person we offended and ask him for forgiveness. And, naturally, all this must be done from the heart, from the soul, so that it is clear, so that there is no doubt that the repentance is sincere. And when we admit our guilt, when we do not justify our actions or our words, and we are forgiven from the heart just as we ask for forgiveness from the heart, then the burden from our soul, this moral burden, is removed.

Exactly the same thing happens, both before man and before God. There is no difference in this! If we have committed a sin, then we walk with a heaviness in our souls, our sense of conscience condemns us, we walk like restless people. But when we reveal our sin to God or to a person and call it by its name, there is a feeling that “a weight has been lifted from the soul.” We see a person’s forgiveness, we feel that God forgives us, and our souls feel better. And when we confirm this verbal repentance with the worthy fruit of repentance in real life, then, naturally, our soul becomes even lighter. If our conscience judges us, then there is hope for correcting our lives and removing the burden from our souls. And all is not lost.

It is important not to forget the following: the longer a person resists the voice of conscience, the longer this burden will last. In addition, over time, as we resist the voice of conscience, it, i.e. conscience will signal us more and more quietly about our abnormal behavior. If we continue in this state, we may reach a point in our lives where this conscience is completely burned out. After this, a moral vacuum will come, and there will no longer be a feeling of heaviness in the soul.

Some people say: “That’s what I did! At first my conscience judged me and it was hard for me. I just repeatedly ignored the voice of conscience, and over time, conscience became silent, and the heaviness left the soul. And it’s not hard for me anymore!” As you can see, the heaviness of the soul has gone away due to the fact that conscience has disappeared.

Indeed, there will be complete freedom from conscience and shame. There will be no heaviness in your soul. But arrogance and shamelessness will become the dominant factor in the life of such a person. Indeed, there will no longer be a heaviness in your soul from shame, but there will be a lot of problems in relationships with people.

The faster and more often we respond to the voice of conscience, the stronger and more powerful the voice of conscience will be to encourage us to repent and not want to repeat such actions. By the way, what can you say in passing? The voice of conscience is the voice of God inside a person. By listening to our conscience or rejecting it, we thus make a choice between good and evil, between Satan and God, and determine who we really are: a person or an animal. We can either degrade or ennoble depending on whether we listen or do not listen to the voice of conscience. The voice of conscience is also the voice of God, this is the voice of the Holy Spirit, which encourages us to goodness and repentance, regardless of whether we believe in God or not. He encourages us to do good and this is what distinguishes a person from an animal. An animal is driven in life by instincts, a person is driven by conscience and sanity.

By listening to our conscience or rejecting it, we thus make a choice between good and evil, between Satan and God, and determine who we really are: a person or an animal.

What other reason could there be for my heart to be heavy?

It may be hard or uncomfortable in the soul and not for moral reasons, but for the exact opposite. The reason for such heaviness in the soul can be: resentment, envy, jealousy, irritation, desire to take revenge on someone...

Such a person has no peace in the person’s heart, the person says: “I don’t find peace, I can’t sleep, I’m sick, I’m angry, anger is boiling.” But this is a different shade of heaviness on the soul, but, nevertheless, this is also heaviness, this is also a burden for our soul. After all, a person does not feel calm, peaceful.
By the way, I would even say that this is not an easy severity - it is a mental illness, and a severe one at that. Because our soul, as if restless, cannot find peace. And if I am by nature touchy, envious, jealous, vindictive, then this is a burden not only for the soul and body - I am a burden for myself. I’m sick, and seriously ill, excuse me, I’ll even say it’s in my head. What to do, in this case, to get rid of this sinful burden of the soul?

If we put it in other words, then we curse ourselves. Touchiness, jealousy, envy, irritability, vindictiveness, etc., this is our real curse. We just don’t seem to want damnation for ourselves. None of us will say to ourselves such a wish that I should have this and that and everything bad. But anger at someone, resentment, jealousy, envy, etc., first of all, like rot, like an infection, like an infection, destroys us. This is another question, will we be able to take revenge on someone or not, if we want to take revenge, will we be able to do it or not? That's another question. We may not be able to do this.

We will want to take revenge on someone, but we may not succeed, but we will definitely harm ourselves

We will want to take revenge on someone, but we may not be able to do this due to some circumstances - the person left, I myself got sick, or something else may happen. But we will definitely harm ourselves! Who do we harm when we are angry with someone or envy someone with black envy, if not ourselves? Therefore, if you want to harm yourself, be sure to be angry with someone, be offended by someone, envy someone, and you will achieve this goal. You can give a 100% guarantee that you will cause the greatest harm to yourself. This is not my advice for you! I say this so that we think about who we are harming in the first place, and do the exact opposite - stop this stupid idea of ​​​​being angry with someone! Have pity on yourself! Don't destroy yourself with your anger!

Therefore, if you want to harm yourself, be sure to be angry with someone, be offended by someone, envy someone, and you will achieve this goal.

Also keep in mind that if the person we want to harm, and whom we are offended by, is not offended and does not react in any way to our anger, we cannot get him with this, then the question arises, are we not giving ourselves a penalty in your own empty gate? In this case, who are we shooting at? Isn't it in yourself? It's the same as shooting yourself in the leg to spite someone! We do harm to ourselves! This shows the extent of our madness!

Such a person who is offended, envious, burning with desire, sits on a powder keg with a lit fuse, which he himself sets on fire. Due to nervousness, all diseases will come to such a person, dementia will come! And such a person can have no doubt that, over time, he will become a client of a mental hospital! Each such attack of evil, aggression, is, as people say, a “jump”, a draft in the head, a refusal of our brains to fulfill their duties and functions. Even if you don’t end up in a psychiatric hospital, you will undoubtedly be a psychopath.

I repeat once again, what to do in this case? I have already said that this is a serious disease. And, of course, in this case you need to be treated! But there is no cure for such bad nature. There are only sedative psychotropic “medicines”! Because medicine is supposed to heal, but the medicine that is given in a psychiatric hospital does not cure a person. It simply suppresses our consciousness and raging nature, so that we do not have any questions, so that our conscience does not torment us, and so that our aggression simply decreases.

Some, as you know, find comfort in alcohol or drugs, but this is also not a solution to the problem, but only aggravates it. To one misfortune we add another, even more insidious one. We didn’t have the mind to act smartly, the psychos and stupidity took over us, and then in addition they began to drink or inject drugs so that the last glimmer of intelligence would disappear.

I'm asking a question. Is there really no cure for heaviness in the soul, which is the result of lack of intelligence or bad character? Unfortunately for us, people really don’t have such a medicine! Only God has it, but we still need to come to an understanding of it.

Is there really no cure for heaviness in the soul, which is the result of lack of intelligence or bad character? Unfortunately for us, people really don’t have such a medicine! Only God has it, but we still need to come to an understanding of it.

Of course, you can’t talk about this in five minutes so that everything becomes clear. And if I try to talk about this briefly and schematically in five minutes, then I will have to use such expressions and phrases, the meaning of which will have to be deciphered for a long time, so that it is clear how to get out of this situation and relieve the burden from the soul. Therefore, I still speak more schematically and in general terms, with the goal of making a person think.

I said that people do not have this medicine, only God has it, to whom we need to come. I don't mean that coming to God means starting to go to church, lighting candles and taking part in the sacraments or agreeing with church doctrines. A religion that is not capable of changing and sanctifying a sinful person already in this life is a pathetic counterfeit of divine truth.

The religion that exists only creates the appearance of deliverance, creating a kind of counterfeit to the true medicine.

Religion, not the one that should be, but the one that exists, does not free a person from problems by getting rid of his sinful nature, which is the cause of the problems of the human soul. She only creates the appearance of this, creating a kind of counterfeit of the true medicine. She removes the burden from the soul in the following way.

Sin, man cannot overcome, we cannot fulfill the Law of God, we will never be justified before God by works, we will be saved by faith, and not by works, we are under grace, and not under the law. He will have mercy on us, regardless of any of our actions, out of his great mercy and love... Therefore, if you have sinned, do not suffer in your soul, cast all your worries on Christ, and do not try to change, as this is impossible!

For a sensual and easily suggestible person this is pleasant! He either places everything on Christ, or throws everything, as believers say, over the back! And if aggression, resentment and anything like that appear, then ask for forgiveness and, forgetting what is behind, reach forward! Those., sin and repent, sin and repent! And so on until the coming of Christ! As a result of such a frivolous attitude towards God, His word, the voice of conscience, the burden from his soul is easily removed! And why be tormented in your soul by remorse for a sin committed, if only Christ could not sin, and only because He had a divine nature on earth!

Something was suggested to a person, he accepted it on faith, but at the same time he himself remained the same as he was before he believed in Christ. Such a religion weans a person from thinking about what he believes in and why he believes! There is a kind of fooling of people going on. Hence the famous Leninist expression: “Religion is the opium of the people.”

But, for a reasonable and sensible person, the soul will calm down only when he gets rid of what creates heaviness in his soul.

But for a reasonable and sensible person, this does not bring peace, since he understands that the problem of the evil caused remains, and this does not give peace to his soul. Such a person’s soul will calm down only when he gets rid of what creates heaviness in his soul. And until he learns the secret of the mechanism of how to get rid of sin, the root cause of the suffering of the soul, he will not calm down.

When I say that we need to come to God, this means that we need to come into a close personal relationship with Him, we need to follow the path of sanctification, we need to know the laws of good and evil and the laws of liberation of our soul from evil. Those. Having freed ourselves in God's way from resentment, envy, jealousy, etc., we will no longer be driven by these animal feelings and passions. We will commit no more sin. We ourselves will not be evil, and we will not offend another person, and our soul will feel free from the burden that our tendency to sin places on us. She seemed to have escaped from the captivity of this slavish, sinful carnal nature.

By the way, to put it simply, the formula for liberating our soul from sin is as simple as the multiplication table. I will read a couple of passages from the Bible, I will not interpret them for you, because... I have already explained this many times, Look how simply it is written. People say that we cannot get rid of sin, it is impossible, we are poor, unhappy people. And while we are on this sinful earth and Satan is here, we are doomed to sin, which means, automatically, we are doomed to carry a burden in our soul.

I'm reading these two places. First passage, Gal.5:16-17: “I say walk in the Spirit, and you will not fulfill the desires of the flesh, for the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh: they oppose each other, so that you do not what is right.” would like to." Pay attention, people say that it is difficult and impossible, and it is not clear how you can get rid of sin?! Paul describes this mechanism of deliverance from sin in a primitive manner!

There are two components of this mechanism – spirit and flesh! Two simple biblical concepts! Tell me, what other intelligence do you need to have to understand such elementary mathematics? It is written here so simply and so clearly - act simply according to the spirit, and you will not sin! Or in other words, do not act according to the flesh, and you will not fulfill the desires of the flesh, just do not listen to what it tells you, and sin will disappear from you! You will not have any rash words, there will be no resentment, there will be no irritation, envy, there will be no psychos, there will be no screaming, uproar, noise and obscene expressions! There will be no conflicts at all. No one will give you change, your conscience will not condemn you! Look how simple it is. And there is no heaviness in my soul. Let's forget what it is.

The second place is Romans 7:21-23: “Therefore I find it a law, that when I would do good, evil is mine. For according to the inner man I delight in the law of God; but in my members I see another law, warring against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that is in my members.” This is a little more complicated than the previous verse I read. But, in principle, in different words they say the same thing.

If a person really wants to free himself from the slavery of his irrepressible sinful nature and wants to feel like a real person, and not an embittered animal, you just need to use your brain a little. Take the Bible, naturally, strain your brains and clearly define for yourself what the Bible means by the words spirit and flesh. Next we need to understand their location in our body. What is spirit, where is it located and what are its signs. And what is flesh, and where is it located and how is it determined?

And then you just need to follow the above instructions from Gal.5:16-17 - “Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh.” I will not talk about this in detail, since this is another topic that we have already covered more than once. Therefore, I will not repeat it. And believers who say that it is impossible to be like Christ here on earth, they thus automatically subscribe to their unbelief and their failure as Christians. Those. These are generally non-believers, not Christians, not the church. In general, they are antichrists.

What else could be said about when a person wants to free himself from the heaviness in his soul due to the fact that his nature is, excuse me, carnal, bad, sinful? Knock and it will be opened to you, ask and you will be answered! Seek and you will find! Be bold, but do not defy God by saying that sin is invincible! Those who want will find a solution, and those who don’t want will find a reason!

And if on the way to God we meet so-called “believers” from churches and synagogues and offer us as “medicines” various meditative postures, like those of yogis, opening the chakras below the head, patching up holes in biofields, bioenergy, meditation, mantras, removal damage and the evil eye, memorized prayers, speaking in other tongues, mystical rituals, rosaries, holy places and other religious attributes that require turning off the mind and unconsciously following in “faith” in the mystical nirvana, then you need to remember the following.

If we want to come to God and want to find answers and free ourselves from the sinful burden of the soul, then we must not forget that the head was not given to us by God to serve as a hanger for a headdress.

If we want to come to God and want to find answers and free ourselves from the sinful burden of the soul, then we must not forget that the head was not given to us by God to serve as a hanger for a headdress. I deliberately listed these so-called. “believing medicines” so that you have an idea about them. This is a world of mysticism, this is headlessness, this is a shutdown of reason, and we are in some kind of inexplicable mystical heights.

Believers believe that we must believe in what we are told, and not ask questions! But, in contrast to these statements, listen to what God says about Himself: “I am wisdom, I dwell with understanding and I seek discerning knowledge.” And those who say that one must believe, that one must listen to the heart and turn off the mind and go into a mystical nirvana, thereby inject a narcotic dose into the veins of the listeners!

What else causes heaviness in the soul?

Dissatisfaction with your life. That is, what I want, I can’t achieve in life. I plan, but the plans are not implemented. There is dissatisfaction with oneself. My life is bad because I don’t understand myself. I'm not satisfied with myself. I never achieve anything. I take on everything and either don’t finish anything or don’t do anything at all. I'm a failure in life. I can’t find a common language with people, I’m a loner in life, I can’t form a family. I am conflicted everywhere.

There is also another reason. People often say that there is no peace in my soul, no joy, that God does not answer me. I don't understand the Bible. I can't find a wise advisor. That is, there are questions and problems, but I don’t have an answer or solution. And I also walk with this burden. And this burden also creates a feeling of heaviness of the soul.

And God exists, and there are wise people, and the Bible is not as complicated as we think. The question just arises, why can’t I solve them, these problems and I don’t know how to do it?

All these problems - dissatisfaction with life, with oneself, all these problems can be solved. And God exists, and there are wise people, and the Bible is not as complicated as we think. The question just arises, why can’t I solve them, these problems and I don’t know how to do it? Why can't I do this? The answer is very simple.
I'm not saying that this is the only answer, but it is one of the most important answers to the questions that life asks us! With the understanding of this answer, further life in God and the solution to all our problems begin. To solve all these problems, we need to know the laws by which we, people, live.
We don’t really know what laws our country lives by. We don't know any economic laws. I will honestly tell you that you don’t need to know all this because it is a well-veiled deception under scientific garb. The science of economics, as such, does not exist at all. This, excuse me, is nonsense, with which people are being fooled. Capitalism, socialism, democracy, liberal system... None of the people really knows what it is and what they eat it with.
But this is what happens in a person: good, evil, their interconnection within us, their opposition, etc. - all this can be found out. We must understand this, understand these laws and patterns of good and evil. To understand what is wisdom and what is stupidity, what is good and what is evil, and how all this coexists within us, and how it interacts with each other. Again, this is not an easy topic, I have touched on it several times and now I will not dwell on it. I want to ask the question: “Why didn’t we know this earlier?”

First of all, they don't teach this in school. Secondly, it is rare that parents know this and teach this to their children. Thirdly, there are no institutes, no universities, no academies where this is taught. The fact that there are philosophy faculties is far from what humanity needs. Modern philosophy – I like to philosophize. Yes, yes, I was not mistaken when I said: “I like to be smart!” Loving real wisdom and learning it is one thing, but loving to be clever in front of each other is completely different! Indeed, there are no such educational institutions, no such institutes where they would teach us wisdom and at least explain to us what it is? But the reason is not that there are no establishments. Life beats us, makes us think, life asks us questions. We would have to respond to them, ask these questions, reflect on them, would have to be persistent in order to get these answers.

But we were simply not capable of learning anything from anyone. Just as from childhood we resisted our parents’ prompts and advice, thinking that we ourselves understood everything correctly, so this habit has spread throughout our lives: to be smart, not to listen to anyone, and to be on our own. We are born with indignation, shouting, disagreement, dissatisfaction and protest. Why? Not everyone does everything as it should, as I understand it! I alone know what, where and why!

Being natural “teachers,” we resisted any kind of teaching. Our ability to learn, to be students, to think, to ask questions and to delve into has atrophied.

Being natural “teachers,” we resisted any kind of teaching. Our ability to learn, to be students, to think, to ask questions and to delve into has atrophied. We have an innate desire to talk, argue, prove, protest and disagree. And on what basis do we protest, how can we prove that we have true knowledge - it doesn’t matter to us! I think so, I don’t like it, I don’t want it - that’s all our arguments in favor of our “learning”!

We resisted any method of teaching. Life teaches us, makes us think - we were against it! Parents tell us, people from the outside tell us - we didn’t listen! And our excuse is typical - that I’m a fool, that everyone is teaching me?! Therefore, what we sow is what we reap. We missed the lessons of wisdom, now we are reaping the lessons of stupidity!

We do not have the knowledge of how to change our lives and ourselves, how to change our bad habits. And the reason for all this is that we are not able to learn!

We do not have the knowledge of how to change our lives and ourselves, how to change our bad habits. And the reason for all this is that we are not able to learn! Everything is natural and everything is logical! If I am not satisfied with life and with myself, then maybe I don’t know what the meaning of a person’s life is, why I came into this world? I don’t know what in this world is true value and what is garbage that hinders the achievement of this goal? Notice that we don't think about this. We think that the meaning of life is money, power, authority, strength and my reign over someone. We don't understand that this is not what we are chasing! It only creates problems for us and an additional feeling of heaviness and burden in our soul. We need to think about this.

Within us, in our consciousness, a revaluation of values ​​must occur and true values ​​must be called by their proper names, and garbage must be called garbage.

Within us, in our consciousness, a revaluation of values ​​must occur and true values ​​must be called by their proper names, and garbage must be called garbage. You will have to recognize your career, your desire to become smarter, and having a lot of money and pleasures as trash. All this is garbage, rubbish that prevents us from learning eternal values! All this gives rise to only one problem. Therefore, in order to stop being smart, we just need to understand that we still lack intelligence in life. We think that we are some kind of outstanding “experts” in all issues and problems of life! It seems so to us, but in reality it is not. We need to stop being clever and categorically asserting something! And in order to understand this, you will need to observe yourself, what we claimed, and how it came true in our lives. This will be necessary so that we become disillusioned with our “outstanding” mental abilities and come to the common human denominator that we really don’t know anything, we don’t understand anything. The only thing we are experts at is being smart, doing stupid things, getting angry, taking revenge, being offended, insisting on our own, and protesting against any training!!! And only after we realize this, understand and admit our stupidity and limitations, will we become able to learn something.

By the way, I would like to recall the biblical verse from the Epistle of James: “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” Having understood and made sure why my plans in my life and their implementation do not fit together, I will have to start repairing my stupid head, my outdated computer, which constantly freezes due to its own stupidity - clean up the memory and reinstall all the programs again.

Of course, you can’t tell everything in a short time. But, if a person wants to know something, these arguments, I think, will give impetus to thinking. And then, as I already said, knock and it will be opened for you! God cannot fail to answer a person who sincerely seeks an answer from Him!



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