Perfectionist- This is an individual constantly striving for the ideal. The meaning of perfectionist can be correlated with the meaning of the concept of perfection. That is why the concept of a perfectionist is synonymous with precise, clear, and not admitting mistakes. Perfectionist antonym: careless, insecure, uncertain.
The meaning of a perfectionist is perceived differently by all people: one admires, the second scoffs, the third condemns. No matter how everyone perceives a perfectionist, whatever attitude they all have towards his personality, for him perfectionism is a way of life, his rules.
A perfectionist is a person who lives by the pursuit of absolute perfection; he constantly wants to meet the extreme degree of perfection. Sometimes, to explain what a perfectionist means, they use a definition such as “excellent student syndrome.” This means that such a person strives to do everything in an exemplary manner, without making mistakes, so that one can firmly say about his activities: it deserves the highest score.
What does perfectionist mean? This is a person who is always dissatisfied with himself. He is no less dissatisfied with others, because he believes that no one else is able to do the job adequately. The categorical nature of such a person extends to absolutely all areas of his life. Signs of a perfectionist can be displayed in appearance, habits, family structure, and at work.
The character of a perfectionist also affects other people in his immediate environment. For the most part, this happens because he strongly strives to align everyone to his standard, wants everyone to be guided exclusively by his rules. And if it happens that a person deviated from the rules and did what was due “in a completely wrong way,” this is understood by a perfectionist as an insult or a personal loss.
The fact that a person will become a perfectionist is laid down in the peculiarities of childhood. From childhood it becomes noticeable that the child resists compromise, he is very independent and it is not easy for him to communicate with other children. They often find him strange, they consider him not quite like the others. A more mature perfectionist chases mirages, fictitious ideals and the bar that he sets for himself. If he fails to achieve the height that he imagined for himself, he will suffer greatly because he will consider himself a failure, but in fact he will do much more than required.
Parental education is the main precondition for the emergence of perfectionism. If a man always strived for an impeccable appearance, the need for ironing and starching bed linen, impeccable order in the house, then we can assume that in his family the mother pedantically maintained cleanliness.
At first, every woman likes that a man loves order, but when she gradually realizes that this is a painful attitude towards order, she is disgusted by it. A woman quickly gets tired of running around the house, cleaning small stains, sweeping away specks of dust, polishing cutlery to a dazzling shine.
Perfectionism in everyday life is born when, in childhood, a child was given the goal of achieving an ideal result in everything he does. Of course, a perfectionist has his hand in the perfect order that should be formed, however, regular moral teachings on how to do things perfectly will get to any patient and hard-working person.
Perfectionist husbands are great at combining household responsibilities and work, but they often look for remote work. If everything in a relationship is so wonderful for the husband himself, then is his wife happy with this situation? Every woman’s intentions are to create her own order, but here the husband takes away what rightfully belongs to her. Therefore, it will be better if perfectionists find their own kind as a couple.
Perfectionist - meaning of the word
It seems to many that a perfectionist is a person who has excellent dignity; they consider him to be quite confident, decent and impeccable. But psychologists determine that a perfectionist is often not who he is thought to be. For the majority of such people, this negatively affects the results of their activities.
A perfectionist does not perceive the meaning of the “golden mean”; he distinguishes only the extremes by which he determines what is ideal or not. This person strives to do absolutely everything perfectly, much better than others, or not start anything at all. He literally does everything himself, because he believes that asking for help is a manifestation of his weakness.
A perfectionist is a person who is characterized by being the driving force behind this. His main goal is the need to achieve excellence for himself and others.
If a person is a perfectionist, then he is a supporter of improvement or always striving for the height of perfection. Such a person strives to reach the goal, having achieved it to the fullest extent; the average result will not satisfy him. This is what often leads to stress.
A perfectionist is very difficult to accept criticism; he is susceptible to the opinions of society, because he wants to appear flawless in front of others. Such a person hides his own shortcomings in every possible way so that those around him do not discover them and cannot think of his personality as unworthy. Therefore, such people basically do everything to appear ideal in front of others. They interpret any small failure as their own insignificance and believe that they cannot improve themselves further, they feel useless, and their income decreases significantly.
To understand what a perfectionist means, observing other individuals and, of course, yourself will help.
A perfectionist is a responsible person who is highly attentive to subtleties. He is very afraid of making a mistake, so he strives to do everything perfectly. Such a person spends a lot of time improving what he does, he sets absolute ideals for himself, so everything else is unacceptable to him. He is a strict critic of himself, and does not accept criticism from the outside. He always imagines the final goal and does not think about intermediate stages.
Although perfectionism is considered a vice, how could geniuses be geniuses if they did not observe extreme precision in what they did - in their theories, inventions and works. If every outstanding scientist did not bring his work to perfection, no one would know about his creation.
A perfectionist in relationships behaves coldly and distantly with his partner. He may not understand at all that he has caused pain with his words. He believes that his chosen one should be ideal, and so should the relationship. If he knows that they are still far from ideal, then he begins to experience disappointment, and perceives his partner as a traitor, so he rejects him.
If a perfectionist with his strict rules has become too intrusive, which prevents his loved ones from living peacefully, then turning to a specialist will not be a bad idea. Continuous tension through the desire for a perfect outcome, the struggle with emerging obstacles can lead to various painful states of the body and psyche, to and.
If a perfectionist concludes that he needs to somehow begin to fight his desire to create ideal order around himself and everywhere in the world, he should look for ways to do this. Since the antonym for the term perfectionist is imperfect, it means that a person needs to try to become at least a little bit the opposite of himself.
You should learn to accept other people’s criticism calmly, analyze it soberly, and understand your own mistakes and the mistakes of others as an integral part of life. If a minor error occurs that does not particularly affect the process, then you should not attach importance to it.
You need to wean yourself from criticizing yourself; instead, it’s better to get used to loving yourself, admitting your own mistakes and even loving them, since they give you experience. When a person is confident, calm and attentive, then others want to communicate with him. If he gets used to doing work so that the result is no less than ideal, this is, of course, very commendable, but before starting a business, it is advisable to evaluate his own strengths and capabilities in relation to it. If a person objectively assesses that he is unable to do a task, then he should not take it on, because later he will be nervous and worried that he cannot do it as he wants.
If he does get down to business, he can limit himself in time and, at the end of the established period, leave the work, not finish it or correct it, because this is what influences the manifestation of excessive perfectionism.
If a perfectionist cannot get rid of his annoying habit on his own, turning to a psychologist will help him. Although perfectionism is a big problem, it is possible to overcome it.
Perfectionist man
All loved ones need to have boundless love and patience to adapt to a perfectionist man. They must be able to shut up in time, not say too much, and when it is necessary to praise and support.
A perfectionist man is a man who stands out among other men due to his excessive, global self-criticism, rejection of external criticism, intolerance to mistakes, uncompromisingness and intransigence. These characteristics can make an adult man a whiner, a pedant, or a despot. Any of these cases will make loved ones unhappy and their lives difficult. Everyone will have to adapt to the head of the family, rules and regulations, and endure his mood swings, which arise because he is either satisfied with himself or extremely dissatisfied.
Day by day, a man can change - be a proud and confident person, or an insecure person whining about life's injustice and failure.
A woman should not assume that a man’s situation is fleeting and he will soon change. This position of the husband is very persistent, so it remains part of the character and radical changes do not occur. It is better to come to terms with the inevitable, which cannot be changed, and try to influence what is still possible to change. For example, you can tell your husband that if he does not rearrange his clothes in orderly rows at least once, then this time will be given to the children or their common interests.
Many men have a fear of failure because they cannot achieve ideal results, so they never relax at all. It is necessary to offer a man such alternatives so that he can think about the irresistible desire for absolutism. Distract him from the perfect execution of everyday tasks. The help of a loving wife can prevent his depression. It is worth telling your husband that there is no clear need for a perfect relationship between spouses and children.
It is advisable to remind your husband that joint sports and walks will help loved ones learn more about each other, lift their spirits and improve their health. It is worth periodically distracting him with your suggestions in order to spend time together if the man is working on one job quite intensively and in depth. The main thing is not to dissuade him, to do the work he loves, so that he does not accidentally interpret it as his wife’s misunderstanding and this does not cause him.
Such a man should know about his wife’s suffering through the lack of proper attention to her. Since this is also a kind of activity, of course, he will want this area to be ideal.
In order for the spouses to feel order in their household responsibilities, the wife must divide the responsibilities so that those tasks that require a thorough approach are given to her husband. The perfectionist spouse should realize that the most responsible work is reserved for him, as this will increase self-esteem and provide great support. Manipulating the husband's perfectionism, he himself may like it, since he does the work and he likes it. In this way, the perfectionist wife and husband remain satisfied.
A perfectionist husband can help his wife around the house and get excited about cooking. At first, the wife will be pleased with her husband’s aspirations, but with his idealism he can get to the heart of even the most hardworking and tidy housewife.
An ideal couple would be both people who are used to bringing everything to perfection and can share responsibilities so that everyone can use their aspirations to the fullest. In the opposite result, quarrels and showdowns will periodically occur in the family. It is incredibly difficult to re-educate a man, or it may not work at all, but directing his efforts in the right direction is really possible.
Perfectionist woman
Almost every woman knows that combining the characteristics of an ideal wife, mother, successful businesswoman and housewife is unrealistic, but not for the understanding of a perfectionist. This woman thinks that she is able to achieve the ideal in everything and combine these characteristics.
A perfectionist woman is a woman who differs from others in her desire to shoulder all the responsibilities and all the responsible work. She suffers more than a perfectionist man from ensuring that absolutely everything is done at a high level. For her, appearance, work, and household chores must correspond to a high level of performance. She also tries to be a perfect mother and a perfect wife to her husband.
Such women are equally intolerant of the mistakes of others and their own. Very often, children of such women become hooligans, so they express their own protest against the strict rules of the mother, and their husbands leave, they get tired of living according to the laws dictated by their wife and find less demanding mistresses.
A perfectionist woman herself does not realize how demanding she is towards her family. She has the same tone at work and at home, and she sincerely cannot understand that it could be different. Or rather, it seems to her that if she changes, then it will be harder for her to control all matters. Naturally, she is not able to do everything perfectly, others see this, but the woman, without ceasing to slow down, works as much as she can. As a result, she doesn’t have time, she’s left alone, everything becomes uncontrollable. To avoid all the potential problems that threaten loneliness, a woman needs to get rid of perfectionism.
A woman who is characterized by perfectionism considers herself obligated to do everything perfectly. She owes it to her family, husband, children, acquaintances, colleagues and friends. Must be an excellent worker and an ideal woman.
A perfectionist woman must look impeccable, be financially independent, contribute a share of her finances to the budget for general expenses, take care of family life, sacrifice everything for the sake of her children, try to maintain her health so that her children do not abandon her, do not look after her, must look young, so that her husband does not leave. She is obliged to cook deliciously, do perfect cleaning, wash things, not show her fatigue and do hateful things with a smile.
She must play sports against her will, because it is considered fashionable and will preserve her youth. She must be kind to everyone around her, help them unselfishly, after all, she has a gentle nature. She must constantly educate herself in order to remain interesting and erudite. She should throw out all the photos in which she looks imperfect, delete them from social networks, so that everyone only sees her as perfect, even in the photo where she is in company. All of the above leads to a single outcome - she loses her nerve.
A perfectionist woman stops and realizes that she no longer has the strength to do everything flawlessly. She is confused about what she owes and to whom, and she no longer knows what she wants. But this is on the inside, and on the outside she is a confident and strong woman. She is still doing that same bunch of things that she wants to finish completely. Due to the desire to make every task impeccable, she is deprived of time for other activities, and therefore feels guilty.
Although a perfectionist woman tries to be the best wife, mother and friend, she cannot allow anyone to make a mistake. Mistakes are failure to fulfill one’s direct responsibilities as one should, or rather, as a perfectionist woman established them. It is difficult for her to understand how everyone can allow themselves to live as they want, but not according to her rules, not to bear a mountain of responsibility, to be frivolous and experience happiness, this drives her crazy.
Probably to many people such a woman seems like an unpleasant, unfriendly and unfriendly person. But did she become like this voluntarily or, perhaps, under other conditions she would have been a completely different person?
If a child has been surrounded by certain standard stereotypes since childhood, which were not worked through in adulthood, then they will take root in the personality. A girl, subject to the influence of such stereotypes, begins to rush through life, doing everything extremely correctly, as she was taught. In the most vital periods, she is not guided by personal opinion, but does what she is told, because others believe that it is better for her, and she agrees.
For example, they decide for her where she should study, for whom, with whom she will live and where to work. The girl obediently does everything and becomes everyone's debt. She becomes callous and closed because she considers showing emotions to be weakness, and she did not experience much happiness to be carefree. She had no time left for fun, since many things required excellent execution.
Such a woman needs a strong, confident man who will tell her that it is time for her to stop, and that she should not live as she was told, she is an independent woman and has the right to decide how well she should do the job. A man can take on several tasks for himself, so they will have time to be together.
A perfectionist woman needs a man who can make her relax, help her analyze her behavior in order to realize how much time she spends to achieve an ideal result in something, which, in fact, is not required, and the main thing is that her She could spend more free time with loved ones.
Perfectionist: the meaning of the term
Some people ask: who is a perfectionist? To do this, it is necessary to define one more concept: perfectionism (from the French perfection - perfection) - a heightened desire for human perfection in all his actions and behavior created by upbringing and the environment. Accordingly, a perfectionist is a person who is characterized by perfectionism. He is convinced of the possibility and necessity of achieving perfection, first of all, in relation to himself. Many psychologists, however, believe that perfectionism is not a virtue at all, but a serious personal problem that forms an individual’s low self-esteem and also negatively affects the results of his work. A perfectionist does not see the “golden mean”; he has only two extremes: the worst and the best - his ideal. He does not see gray, for him there is only black and white. For him, there is only “ideal” and “non-ideal”, and “non-ideal” is absolutely everything except the ideal. In other words, he strives to do everything perfectly, better than others, or not to do anything at all, and he is completely confident in this. He considers asking for help to be a weakness.
Perfectionist - who is it?
This is someone who would rather achieve nothing than achieve something not fully. The one whose thoughts set unrealistically high goals for him. Perfectionists are sensitive to public opinion. Any criticism hurts them. Perfectionists try to hide their shortcomings from others. They are afraid to expose their weak points. Therefore, they do everything that depends on them in order to become perfect. Failure or failure shows them that they are unable to improve themselves. As a result, they feel worthless and their self-esteem drops.
How can you determine to what extent the word “perfectionist” applies to you? Who is this and how can I identify him?
1) You are very responsible, you are afraid to make a mistake, you are very attentive to details.
2) You strive to do everything as best as possible, ideally.
3) You spend too much time perfecting something.
4) You set absolute ideals, while everything else is unacceptable to you.
5) You are your own harshest critic.
6) You react painfully to criticism from others.
7) You always imagine the final goal; intermediate stages do not matter to you.
What if perfectionism isn't always a vice? Let's imagine what the world would be like without great works of world literature, painting, architecture, without great and wonderful composers? Let's look at this from a different point of view. A perfectionist is a creative person, creator, creator. The creator simply must be a perfectionist, otherwise the writer who creates his work can wave his hand and say, having written on the first try: “it will do either way” or “that’s fine.” Would we really be able to read Faust and Notre Dame if Goethe and Hugo were not perfectionists? Would we be able to see the Mona Lisa now if da Vinci had decided not to perfect the image of the aforementioned lady’s smile?
We wouldn’t have heard “The Four Seasons” if Vivaldi, when practicing the violin, had said: “I won’t practice the part, and that’s fine.” Thus, perfectionism is only good in certain areas of our lives that actually require an ideal to strive for. However, in ordinary life it is very difficult to achieve the ideal, because the society in which we live is far from ideal. So is it worth feeding yourself with meaningless illusions? Do you just need to live and enjoy every little thing?
Perfectionism in moderate doses leads to an improvement in the quality of the work done, “fashions” out of an ordinary person a creature close to the concept of perfection, and with an overdose we get depression, nervousness, paranoia (illness) and other things that will lead the newly-minted neurotic into the impenetrable labyrinth of his own illusions .
A person who strives to complete work with 6 points on a 5-point system. A person who cannot refuse to carry out a task that is recognized as unprofitable, and its further development is disastrous. Finally, a person who does not “know how” to step on the seams of tiles and cannot go to bed until he has removed all the debris in his apartment or trimmed the uneven grass in his yard. (See photo).
These are graduated definitions (in fact, the concept and meaning of perfectionism is multifaceted and can manifest itself in different ways): from positive to neurotic.
Some people think that a perfectionist is very afraid of responsibility. This is wrong!
Synonyms
There are no official synonyms for perfectionism. There are also no adjacent or close phenomena.
The following words are actively used in everyday life:
- perfection;
- ideal;
- impeccability;
- perfection;
- absolute, etc.
Antonyms
The concept of destructionism becomes antonymous to perfectionism: these are spenders and spendthrifts who tend to destroy (create chaos) and are incapable of construction or creating something new. Another clearly opposite phenomenon (although the source is fundamentally different) is “not giving a damn”, here a person makes nothing at all, no decisions, relying on the beloved “maybe” by many.
From here, from “not giving a fuck,” a thread stretches to procrastination (putting things off), which can become a natural consequence of perfectionism (putting things off due to fear that it will not be possible to do something perfectly, perfectly).
Signs and characteristics of a perfectionist man
Improving yourself is a great idea as long as it doesn’t affect others. Men who are perfectionists are demanding, caustic in their comments, and productive in their response to malicious and unconstructive criticism.
At home
Adequately (!) - when there is a scandal because of unerased dust, incorrectly laid out books or plates, or because of a remaining stain on the wallpaper. If the form of perfectionism is healthy, normal, you will only get crooked smiles and dissatisfied grimaces for the listed “jambs”.
In case of severe pathology, the ingredients for soup are weighed on scales, napkins are measured with rulers and centimeters, in the middle of the night a perfectionist can spit on sleep and run to the bookshelf to arrange the volumes in an ideal line. There is no point in interfering; psychotherapy will be needed to cure this.
At work
As a boss, he finds fault with little things (there is an organizer at the other end of the table, the keyboard is located at the wrong angle in relation to the monitor), shouts and fires for the slightest offense (the number in the report is ugly corrected, the toilet seat is not raised, the table is a mess).
In a relationship
He is as demanding of half as he is of himself. If he irons his socks and arranges them in a checkerboard pattern, and makes his bed perfectly smooth in the morning, the same is expected of you. If you systematically violate the rules of a perfectionist, he will abandon you.
Signs and characteristics of a perfectionist woman
A cocktail of pathological striving for ideals and a tendency towards emotionality and sensitivity - what is the drink?
At home
He wipes, washes, scrubs - snow-white wallpaper, shiny baseboards, clean, like in an operating room. He lashes out at family members if they threaten the established order.
At work
Performs tasks pedantically and meticulously: ideal for working with papers, analytics, and statistics. As a boss, like a male perfectionist, she is unbearable.
In a relationship
Perfect if the partner matches her picture of relationships, family, love. When something (even a small thing) is out of schedule and the order established by her is violated, she will try to return it to the mainstream, and if she fails to achieve success, she will break the connection.
Is a perfectionist a neurotic who comes from perfectionism?
The neurotic form of perfectionism develops from a healthy desire for a better result. A neurotic is a sapper, his field of activity is a minefield. A person is afraid to act, sets goals that are obviously unattainable, and works not for pleasure, but to meet someone’s (their own, family, society, etc.) expectations.
What is perfectionism and what are its manifestations in society?
An ideal example of social perfectionism is Yevgeny Zamyatin’s dystopia “We.” A totalitarian state, complete control of activities and life (including sexual contacts), a set daily routine, a strictly limited number of hours for “free” leisure.
Such a society is represented by a clock - a perfectly calibrated mechanism operating on the basis of a perpetual motion machine (watch the video on the Internet). Apparently, this is why society is falling apart - the engine has not been created.
I am a Perfectionist, what to do, how to live with it?
Do nothing if the form of perfectionism is healthy: you want to work for pleasure and to achieve high results, you know how to stop if you understand that the matter is losing, you don’t quit halfway if you know that a reward awaits you in the end. This is healthy self-criticism.
Remember: perfection is hardly achievable, so know how to limit perfectionist tendencies without leading them to the point of absurdity. Jumping over tile joints is a fun game for a child, but a psychological disorder for an adult.
If you feel that the desire for ideal is pressing, stop: set short-term goals (they are easier to achieve), remember what has already been done (will give you confidence), redirect some of the work to colleagues/family/friends (learn to trust people).
Wikipedia: is a perfectionist good or bad?
Vicky treats the phenomenon philosophically, noticing its strengths and soft sides. Referring to the work of a female psychoanalyst (Karen Horney), the encyclopedia notes that perfectionism is an integral part of an idealized society. In other words, this is a necessary condition for achieving harmonious social unity of the state and its citizens.
Perfectionism is a psychological concept that refers to people or a specific person (perfectionist) who are prone to high standards of quality of work done or their own achievements.
Quite often, these people put too much of a burden on their shoulders and get involved in adventures in order to prove their worth, adventures that are obviously unsuccessful.
Psychologists clearly share a person’s desire to achieve success in a specific business with a sober assessment of their capabilities and the actions of perfectionists.
In the second case, most often people are doomed to failure in advance, but still try to bang their heads against the wall until they reach a manic state.
What is the reason for this feeling and how to get rid of it? We'll talk about this below.
Perfectionism develops in every person from childhood. when parents begin to adhere to strict boundaries in raising their child and give him a lot of difficult tasks.
At the same time, they make it clear to their child that without achieving the solution to the tasks they have set, he will not receive motherly (fatherly) love. 
The child, being virtually chained to the wall, begins to achieve results at all costs by all means and methods. Moreover, this result is most often expressed in the form of grades, certificates, medals...
Perfectionism is also often called “excellent student syndrome”, trying to explain the problem by childhood traumas due to the first failures, which were perceived much more painfully than should have been expected.
After all, if a child who sets himself the goal of getting an “excellent” grade at school suddenly gets his first “C”, this will become a serious problem for him, unlike those children for whom C grades are commonplace.
A similar thing happens with a young athlete who is used to always achieving only the top step of the podium in everything, and then suddenly finds himself outside of it altogether.
According to research by scientists, the usual desire for success and perfectionism are different concepts. If the first type has a sober assessment of one's own capabilities, then the second one is more likely manic tendency strive for ideal, which also has an obsessive nature.
Over time, perfectionism even leads to low self-esteem and obviously unattainable goals that a person sets for himself.
When successful, such a person often doesn’t even pay attention to it, but fixates on own failures as on the most important thing and eventually finds himself facing the abyss of hopelessness.
In order to avoid all this, from childhood it is necessary to instill in the child the understanding that mistakes are an integral part of life.
Sometimes it is important not to scold your child for losing a sports competition or getting a bad grade, but to reassure him so that he will do better next time.
To avoid becoming a perfectionist, you need to strive for one single and very specific goal that can actually be achieved, and not take on several things at the same time.
By concentrating on success, you can achieve it, and with fairly minimal volitional and moral costs.
Also The enemy of a perfectionist is constant thinking and planning your life down to the smallest detail..
Such people, wanting to start their own business, have not yet even fully formalized their entrepreneurial status, already have a clear idea of what color the wallpaper will be in their office. But problems need to be eliminated only as they arise, right?
In addition, it is also important the picture of a successful person imposed by society who has all the components of a financially secure world (house, car, career), but at the same time suffers from regular nervous breakdowns and situations.
Think about what truly makes you happy and organize yourself so that life flows without the influence of irritating factors. 
If a person experiences frequent neuroses caused by the desire for ideals, it is time to treat perfectionism at a professional level.
Perfectionists very often withdraw into themselves instead of sharing their problems with others. Moreover, sharing here means not just telling, but asking for help.
Just people of this mindset are convinced, that they don’t have a certain job better than them no one will do, forgetting that everyone has their own methods of achieving a goal and there are also alternative ways to solve a certain problem.
The hallmark of a perfectionist is that he strives to compete with people instead of finding common denominators and trying to cooperate. Moreover, this does not mean at all that he has no friends.
It’s just that such a person tends to separate the concepts of “friendship” and “professional activity”, trying to follow the rule “I myself!”, which most often leads to the fact that after years he has no true friends left at all.
To get rid of the perfectionist syndrome you need to follow simple rules:
1) Learn to do your work with pleasure and enjoy the process itself, and not the result achieved.
2) Accustom yourself to the fact that they may tell you that your work is not ideal. If you are preparing a report, try to take it to as many people as possible for review. This will increase the likelihood that at least one of them will give you a negative assessment, thereby accustoming you to the possible polarity of opinions. 
3) Try, contrary to your habits, to sleep through work, simply turn off your phone and pretend to be cut off from the outside world. A heightened sense of responsibility, of course, will resist this at all costs. But you want to overcome perfectionism, don’t you?
4) Admit it to yourself, that you have this problem - this is the main step towards healing.
5) Try to figure out the reason why you are trying to do everything perfectly. Perhaps it is hidden in early childhood? Or maybe you just think that people will love you more this way? Figure it out...
6) Try not to pay much attention to unimportant things in your work or everyday life. It is clear that every little thing matters to you, but for 97% of people this is not the case. Therefore, is the game worth the candle?
7) Every perfectionist tends to focus his attention on the bad - this is how he mobilizes himself. But try to do the opposite - regularly remember your successful decisions and actions. Then you won't get sick!
There are many more different methods of how you can get rid of perfectionism. But even those presented to you will definitely help you start a more measured and fulfilling life, without stress and neuroses!
The meaning of perfectionism.
First, let's define what is perfectionism. This term comes from the English word perfection, which means“ideal, perfection”, and is used to denote attitudes that force a person to constantly strive for the ideal. Sometimes he takes on an unhealthy character - then a perfectionist begins to treat himself categorically badly if he makes any mistake or inaccuracy in anything; sometimes it is better not to deliver a job on time, for example, than to do it less than perfectly, etc.
Who are perfectionists?
Perfectionists are very characterized by the so-called procrastination - the tendency to put off a lot for later in anticipation of inspiration, some special state that will allow them to do something as it should, ideally. When starting this or that task, a perfectionist feels anxiety about what the result will be; in a pathological condition, this anxiety can turn almost into a panic attack; as a result, procrastination again appears - the desire to delay the moment of completing work, which “may not turn out perfectly.” " A perfectionist, for whom the pursuit of ideality has already become a disease, can literally hate what he wants to do so well.
Perfectionism can manifest itself in everyday life in very different ways. For example, many have encountered women of all ages who are almost obsessed with order in the house. They may literally not be able to go to bed if a particular shelf is not wiped down, and they may not leave the kitchen in the evening without washing the cup from which they drank clean water. And almost everyone in their class or group had a girl who cried because of straight A’s. Anorexics and bulimics also often suffer pathological perfectionism- in relation to your appearance.
At the same time, such a housewife may not care about her figure, an excellent student may not care about order in the house (after all, it is better to study more than to clean all the time), and an anorexic teenager may not be at all interested in studying. That is, perfectionism in fact, it quite rarely affects all areas of life; as a rule, it is concentrated in the most important and significant areas. Although, of course, there are situations when a person truly strives to be perfect in everything, this is already an extreme form of a kind of “perfectionism disorder.”
