Sometimes it is very necessary to portray strong emotions. Play it like they cry in the movies. Emotions are expressive, they capture a person’s attention, shaking him to the core. Logic is powerless against feelings. This is a very powerful tool for influencing other people.
Can this be learned? How to make yourself laugh for no reason or cry at any moment? For many, this is real acting, inaccessible to mere mortals. In fact, learning this is not very easy, but it is quite possible.
To begin, go to the mirror, stand straight and completely relax. Relaxation is very important. Release your facial muscles. Then start grimacing, depicting certain emotions: sadness, joy, anger, bewilderment. Don't force yourself at first, play what you want. Don't rush, do it calmly, somewhat slowly.
Don’t try to immediately portray vivid emotions; beginners often make this mistake. Direct your attention inward. Stanislavsky said that the main thing happens inside.
Having depicted one emotion, feel how your facial muscles work in it. Feel what your body wants to do. If you take the time to do this, you will quickly notice that even in such a feigned emotion, in anger your teeth and fists clench on their own, in sadness your head and shoulders drop, in joy there is lightness in your chest.
Sadness and tears
Now pay special attention to sadness. Think about what makes you sad. Remember a moment in your own life when you felt like crying. How old were you then? Immerse yourself in this moment. Remember. Become a child. Maybe you didn’t cry then, but now you can... Now everything is possible. At first, just feeling the moisture in your eyes is enough.
Play this theater every day for at least 20 minutes. Either way, it won't be a waste of time! Gradually you become aware of the connection between your body and emotions. This is self-development, the path to mastery.
Development is the path to the artist’s skill
Now we need to make the state more manageable. To do this, let's start from the outside. Look at the facial expressions of a crying person. Find the right moment in the movie and watch it carefully several times. Now play: reproduce the facial expressions of someone crying, sob.
Remembering your own crying will help you force yourself to be natural. Connect them together, external facial expressions and breathing when crying with personal internal experience. Do not be distructed.
Even a small tear is an indicator that you are on the right path. You can easily see this for yourself. When you stay in this state, the tears will flow. If this happens, don't hold them back, give them freedom. Each time the skill will grow and it will become easier and easier.
In the future, to trigger the necessary emotions, it is better to take not your personal experience, but, for example, a scene from a film in which you want to cry. This will help you learn to simultaneously experience the role and observe it in order to make adjustments. However, there are no strict recommendations here, as in any creative process.
Auxiliary techniques
Of course, there are more mundane options for how to bring tears. Actors use them too.
How they cry on stage:
- If you rub your eyes and don't blink for about 3 minutes, your eyes start to water. To avoid blinking, you can simply hold your eyelids with your fingers. Add to this facial expressions, sobs and what you have already learned in terms of managing emotions, then your game will turn out to be convincing. This is the easiest way to make you cry.
- Some actors use a similar trick. They simply open their eyes wide, hold them as long as they can, and then yawn several times.
- Use peppermint oil or menthol, they are included in cosmetic balms and ointments. If you rub such a balm or mint oil under the eyes, on the lower eyelid, then after about half a minute the tears will flow. Don't forget to beat. When using this method, do not let menthol get into your eyes!
- Another technique, how to cry on purpose, was often used by artists of the past. Let's hold our face over the freshly chopped onion, and when our eyes water, run to the stage. The advantages include that such inhalations are beneficial for the eyes and lungs. To do everything unnoticed, you need to grind the onion to a pulp and fill it with a small bottle. Hide it in your palm, and when necessary, bring it to your eyes.
- A similar trick is to use a handkerchief soaked in ammonia.
- If all else fails, you can use sodium sulfacyl eye drops. This medicine is often used for preventive purposes. Pinching your eyes will make it easy to bring tears to your eyes whenever you want. In movies, they often use harmless “natural tears” drops; they are also sold in pharmacies. To use them, feel free to drop 8-10 drops, the tears will flow due to the amount of liquid.
How not to cry if there are tears in your eyes
Sometimes there is a question of holding back tears. For artists, it also occurs when they are deeply immersed in feelings. But this is often asked by those who simply don’t know what to do when you want to stop yourself from crying, but you can’t.
Here's what to do:
- Even out your breathing. The crying person breathes unevenly, gusty sobs and sniffling are very characteristic of crying. Take a deep breath through your nose, then exhale smoothly through your mouth. Several such inhalations and exhalations noticeably calm the emotions. A similar effect occurs if you take a deep breath and hold your breath.
- Take a break. Imagine your favorite hero. Count the items in the room that you want. Clench your hands tightly into fists, focusing your attention on them. Any of these tricks will help you make the switch.
- Drink some water. Swallowing will ease the lump in the throat that often accompanies a rush of emotions.
- Blink to stop the flow of moisture to your eyes.
Don't be shy about tears if you do cry. Be natural, allow yourself to cry and they will pass faster. Look at it as training. Every time you tried to do something about your feelings, you learned.
To master the art of managing emotions, you need to be patient. Not everything can work out right away. It doesn’t matter whether you want to learn how to shed tears or, on the contrary, hold them back.
Be sure to end your exercises with positive thoughts, play with a smile and joy. And the result will come.
Crying is one of the physiological reactions of humans. The cry of a newborn is one of the first signals through which he establishes a connection with his parents. Tears accompany a person throughout his life. Very often we talk about our feelings with tears, expecting support and understanding from others. Crying can also be an emotional-behavioral response to something a person sees, hears, or thinks. Sometimes we just want to be alone to cry. This is fine. Moreover, it is very important to do this to stay physically and emotionally healthy. However, as they say, everything is good in moderation. Hysteria or intense crying can lead to internal tension, in which a person's heart rate and breathing rate increase. There are times when we need to stop crying, even though we may be very upset. Fortunately, there are several ways that can help us with this.
Steps
Part 1
Eliminate the reasons for crying- If you can't figure out what thoughts trigger your tears, think about it when you stop crying.
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Try to put down on paper what upsets you. If you are too upset and don't have the strength to write beautiful sentences, don't worry, write as best you can. It can be simple scribbles. In addition, no one requires complete sentences from you. Write one big word on the page that represents your feelings, or many words that are infused with your emotions and feelings. However, it is not enough to simply write about feelings and emotions. You will need to reflect and discuss these feelings and thoughts later when you are in a calm state.
Try to distract yourself physically. To break the cycle of negative thoughts, try distracting yourself by tensing your muscles or running an ice cube over your arm or neck. Be prepared for the fact that this will not happen for a single day, because in order to regain peace of mind, you will have to fight negative thoughts for a very long time.
- Try to distract yourself with music. While listening to music, try to concentrate and calm down. Try singing along. This can help you regain control of your breathing and focus on something else.
- Take a walk. A change of environment can help you combat negative thoughts. Exercise can also help you reduce your breathing and heart rate.
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Change your body position. Facial expressions and body position influence our mood. If you cower with a frowning face, you are unlikely to have positive thoughts. If you have the opportunity, try changing your body position. Stand up and place your hands on your waist, or try imitating a lion and roaring, “Rrrrr.”
- Changing your body position will help you stop crying and pull yourself together very quickly.
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Practice progressive muscle relaxation techniques. Progressive muscle relaxation is a special type of relaxation exercise that alternates between relaxation and tension of individual muscle groups. In the beginning, you can limit yourself to five-second intervals. All exercises are done according to a three-stage scheme: tense - feel - relax. Each stage should be accompanied by a count of breathing cycles. Strain your neck, feel it and relax. Next, move on to other parts of the body: chest, arms, and so on. Continue doing the exercise until you reach your feet.
Remind yourself:"This is temporary." Although you may feel like your suffering will never end, tell yourself that it will end soon. This won't last forever. In addition, this will help you understand that the light has not converged on this problem.
- Wash your face with cold water. The coolness can distract you for a moment to focus on your breathing. Cool water can also help relieve swelling (swollen eyes from crying), which often occurs when a person cries.
Part 2
Prevent tears-
Ask yourself if crying is a problem for you. How does this affect your well-being? For example, studies show that women cry on average 5.3 times a month, and men - 1.3 times. However, these are just average statistics. Some people cry more often because they are facing major challenges in their lives, such as divorce, the death of a loved one, or other significant life events. When you cannot control your condition and it affects your personal life, then you should pay attention to it, as this fact may indicate a serious problem.
- During difficult periods in life, people often feel depressed and have difficulty coping with sad and negative thoughts.
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Think about why you are crying. If there is something going on in your life that is causing you stress or anxiety, chances are it may be causing you to cry. For example, if you are grieving the death of a loved one or the end of a relationship with a loved one, tears are a natural reaction. But sometimes life itself can become a source of stress, and you may find yourself crying without understanding why you're doing it.
Identify what makes you cry. Think about what could be the reason for your tears and write down this reason on paper. When do you get hysterical? Does this happen on certain days? Under what circumstances? What can bring you to your senses?
- For example, if a certain genre of music reminds you of your ex-girlfriend or your ex-boyfriend, try to avoid listening to that music. The same principle applies to photographs, smells, places, and so on. At least for a while, try to avoid anything that might make you cry.
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Start keeping a journal. Write down all your negative thoughts and ask yourself if they are rational. Think about your ideals in a similar way. Can you say that you look at things realistically? Be kind to yourself. Make a list of your accomplishments or things that make you happy. Write down in your journal reasons why you should be grateful for what you have.
Evaluate yourself. Ask yourself: “How do I respond to disagreement? Does this make me angry? Tears? Indifference?" Chances are, if you ignore the conflict, you won't have to shed any tears. Knowing how to respond appropriately to conflict will help you take control of your emotions.
- Ask yourself, “Who is in control of my life?” If you take control of your life, you will not have to reap the bad consequences. For example, instead of saying, “It's the teacher's fault that I didn't pass the exam,” admit that you didn't study enough and weren't prepared for the exam. Next time, focus on your studies and your score will be better.
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First you have to get rid of embarrassment. Many people do not cry, even when it is very painful, because they are afraid that they will be judged, that they will think badly, that they will laugh. Observe others, and you will understand that only in childhood, drops from the eyes were something negative; in adulthood, it is a means to get your way, as well as a way to express real emotions. And there is nothing wrong with such manifestations.
Physical ways to make you cry
The easiest way to induce tears is to not blink. Keep your eyes wide open for a few seconds. The surface will begin to dry out, and drops from tear streams will be a way to restore water balance. You can turn away and then raise your tear-stained eyes. But it’s better to practice in advance.
Onions can make you cry. You just have to smell it or cut it. This option is suitable for filming or theater; in real life, the smell of this plant will give you away, so be careful. A similar method is menthol balm or “star”. Apply a small amount to the skin under the lower eyelid. The strong smell will definitely bring tears to your eyes, be very careful not to get this substance in your eyes.
Use special drops - natural tears. This is a safe way to even cause hysterics. They will roll like real ones. But to implement this, you will have to step away for a couple of minutes to bury them unnoticed. You can buy such a product at the pharmacy, and it is important to follow the instructions for use.
You can also hurt yourself. Pulling hair from the nose or eyebrows also causes lacrimation. And this can be done in almost any atmosphere, and everything will seem very natural.
Moral ways to cry
To squeeze out a tear, you need to remember something terrible. Everyone has a grudge, a severe shock, the death of loved ones, or something similar. Just replay such a moment in your memory, and tears will well up in your eyes. Of course, it’s not very pleasant to return to that time in memories, but if you really need it, then it can be used. Not everyone succeeds the first time, because the habit of hiding emotions gets in the way, so practicing in front of a mirror will not be superfluous.
And if you don’t want to think about the unpleasant things in your life, think about the films or literary characters that shocked you. Images from childhood especially evoke a reaction. For example, a picture of how Gerasim drowned Mumu can touch the heart and help in realizing his plans.
But the most important thing is not just to play tears, but to be sincere so that people around you believe. Therefore, look for something bad in the circumstances around you, take a closer look, and perhaps the tears themselves will begin to flow without any special influence.
Not only women and children are especially vulnerable; young men, especially those in adolescence, often cry in critical situations. This is due to the fact that, for example, teenagers still cannot come to terms with the fact that they are losing control over certain situations that did not exist in their past. Tearfulness can be the result of stress accumulated over the years, or a shock experienced in the recent past. In any case, for those with such a reaction to problems, flowing tears only cause trouble. There are several ways to quickly cope with emotions and calm down.
Instructions
a) inhale air through your nose and exhale through your nose;
b) inhale air through your nose and exhale through your mouth;
c) inhale and exhale through your mouth;
d) inhale air through your mouth and exhale through your nose.
You need to do this for at least five minutes.
Helpful advice
All methods of solving the problem of excessive emotional reaction and tears are very effective. Although they are not achievable in a relatively short time, in order to make your life, if not easier, then calmer, you should not regret a few free evenings and engage in self-improvement.
It is known that women are more emotional, which, however, helps them avoid nervous breakdowns by splashing out their emotions. It may seem that these emotions are spontaneous, but in reality this is not always the case. The manifestation of real emotions is not always an aesthetic spectacle - a mouth wide open in a scream, furiously staring eyes, a flushed face. A lady’s appearance is also unattractive when she really cries. Many female aesthetes have learned to cry on purpose and not look repulsive at the same time.
Instructions
If tears are a tool of manipulation, then the reaction should be taken into account. For some, a completely theatrical scene with rolling eyes and wringing of hands will be enough. A tear has not yet had time to roll off his eyelashes, and he is already ready for anything, as long as you don’t. You have to try hard in front of someone and sob convulsively all evening, having achieved your goal with considerable difficulty and a reddened nose. But for some people, crying for no particular reason in any form just begins to enrage you and you risk being left without - at the first sign of tears, he will simply run away. Therefore, it is important to choose the right audience.
A woman’s emotionality allows her to actually experience an imaginary event. Take advantage of this gift of yours. To specifically imagine or remember something offensive or painful. Practice in front of the mirror like actresses do. Try the scene with your eyes wide open (they will start to water naturally if you don't blink for a while). See how tragically your eyes fill with tears, how the tears on your eyelashes begin and, increasing in size, roll down your cheek. From such a spectacle you will even feel sorry for yourself. Try a more complex option, when tears roll down from under half-lowered eyelashes along the cheeks, but not along the tip of the nose.
Don't forget that you are wearing cosmetics today. If your cheeks are thickly covered with powder, and your eyes are covered with ordinary, non-water-repellent mascara, then when you cry, you risk turning into a real witch with mascara smeared under your eyes and black trails from it running down your cheeks. If the tears are immediately wiped away with a handkerchief provided, then they will not be visible and the effect of such crying will be zero.
And don’t overdo it by bringing up unpleasant memories in yourself to make you cry. You may really become so upset that you forget about your intention on purpose, and the process will go into an uncontrollable stage - with red, swollen eyes and nose.
In some situations, overly emotional people fail to control themselves, which they greatly regret later. Scientists have proven that the outburst of negative emotions, contrary to popular belief, negatively affects our physical and mental state, leaving behind a lot of complexes and psychological trauma.
People cry from the very first day of life - this is our body's natural reaction to stress. The reason for tears is a feeling of deep grief, resentment, disappointment. Pity and compassion, a sense of pride and sincere joy can also cause tears. Psychologists agree that crying is healthy. However, there are life situations when crying means losing, showing your weakness, vulnerability. What to do when you need to restrain yourself at any cost, you will learn from this article.
In what situations is it necessary to restrain yourself?
Women are often called crybabies. Yes, our mobile psyche reacts to any emotional shock. We cry from overwhelming feelings. Tears are necessary. They help cope with stress and extinguish negative emotions. Tears of sympathy are especially useful for us, as they heal not only our body, but also our soul.
But there are situations when you can’t cry.
Here are some of them:
- On the exam. It seems to you that the teacher is being too picky and has decided to give you a bad grade at any cost. But you were tired and studied all night. Tears of resentment well up in my eyes. These tears cannot be held back;
In such a situation, you absolutely cannot cry. Why? A small child with tears evokes pity and attracts attention. Having cried, he gives a signal: I am weak, have pity on me. During an exam, crying will most likely cause a backlash. She’s crying, which means she doesn’t know anything, didn’t teach her, and is trying to make her feel sorry for her.
To be on equal terms with the teacher, you need to show that you are an adult and know how to restrain yourself.
- At an interview. During the interview, you are asked a lot of questions that you think are incorrect, forcing you to show emotions and get nervous. The fact is that the employer has his own idea of what kind of employee he needs. In order to check whether the applicant is resistant to stress and unforeseen situations, a so-called stress interview is conducted. Shedding tears is the worst way out in this situation. This means showing your weakness and unsuitability for the job you are applying for. If you need this job, you must be sure to hold back your tears when talking to the employer;
- On the street with a large crowd of people. It happens that an unexpected trouble takes you by surprise. A misfortune happened, a loved one left. The natural way out in this case is sobbing and bitter tears. No need to cry in the street. This will cause unnecessary attention from strangers. Passers-by are unlikely to be able to help you. But swindlers who take advantage of a person’s vulnerable state will not pass by.
There is no doubt that there are a lot of situations in which you need to restrain yourself. You have encountered them many times. How can you hold back the tears that come at the wrong time and control your emotions?
- Switching attention;
If tears are already welling up in your eyes and you definitely need to hold them back, you can mentally ask yourself one of the following questions: “Did I turn off the iron?”, “Are my neighbors flooding me?”. Psychologists call these questions "adrenaline". A sharp release of adrenaline into the blood will change your emotions, and you will not cry.
- Turning on the imagination;
Imagine your offender in a funny and absurd way.
Or try "substitution method"- you are the boss, and the boss is you. How many kind words would you say to him? The main thing here is not to overdo it. Loud laughter in such a situation is also inappropriate.
Physical ways not to cry
- Change your body position. If you are sitting, stand up, you can take a few steps, move a chair, rearrange papers. Act according to the situation;
- Inhale slowly and deeply, straighten your shoulders, raise your head up;
- Interlock and unclasp your fingers. You can pinch your palm;
- Ask for water, take a few deep, slow sips;
- Shift your gaze, look into the distance or at a picture hanging on the wall.
If you are about to cry for a physical reason: your eyes are watering from fatigue, dust or debris has gotten in, you are allergic to strong odors, then these measures will not help you. In this situation, the best way out is to apologize and try to eliminate the cause of the tears. Take your medications, wash your eyes, get some fresh air.
To prevent a negative mood after an unpleasant conversation from haunting you all day, take emergency measures:
- Wash your face immediately with cold water;
- read “to yourself”, if possible, then out loud, a funny children’s poem;
- go to the mirror, forcefully smile at yourself, then again. This can be done until the smile becomes natural;
- drink hot sweet tea.
If you cry very often at the slightest reason and find it very difficult to hold back your tears, consult a doctor. You may have health problems. This could be stress, chronic fatigue, thyroid disease.
Calm yourself using deep breathing techniques. This may not be so easy to do when you're crying, but try to take a deep breath (through your nose if possible), count to seven, and exhale slowly to a count of eight. Take five full breaths. If you cry a lot, it can trigger hyperventilation syndrome, which will only make your condition worse. Practice deep breathing techniques throughout the day or whenever you feel stressed.
Pay attention to negative and sad thoughts. Control your positive and negative thoughts. The cause of tears can be negative thoughts that have been weighing you down for a long time. You may be thinking, “He left me forever,” or, “I have no one...” If you want to take control of your thoughts and tears, you need to identify which thoughts are causing negative emotions in your case.
