A state of constant anxiety can exhaust anyone. Living under stress that you don’t know when it will end means steadily undermining your nervous system. But how to stop, how to stop reacting to these stimuli, how not to drive yourself into this abstract cage, so as not to find a way out of it? We must immediately begin to unravel this tangle of misfortunes, only to do this we need to understand which thread to pull so as not to get even more entangled.
What to do to calm down and stop being nervous
The first thing that comes to mind is to take action. When you are inactive in response to something or someone putting pressure on you, you feel that you are allowing yourself to be crushed, trampled, and destroyed even more. When you do something, you already realize that you can also control the situation and even after some time turn it in your direction. But surprisingly, sometimes you just need to remain inactive, at least outwardly. It all depends on the nature of the stress and its cause. And let the outsiders think that the current situation has put you into a stupor, but in reality you just need time to carefully think about your further actions. Of course, it can be difficult to concentrate at a time when you are nervous, but there are a few simple techniques that will help you put all worries aside for a while. For example, you can put a notepad or just a sheet of paper in front of you, take a pen and start writing a plan on how to get out of a state of anxiety. If you don’t have a pen or paper at hand, you can open any application on your smartphone that would allow you to write a list. It could be an electronic notepad, a text editor, or even just a calendar. The latter is preferable when you need to schedule a specific action for a specific date or hour. The same manipulations can be done on a tablet, laptop or home computer. But it’s better not to make plans on working computer equipment if you don’t want them to become the property of the system administrator or one of the other employees - well, then everything depends on the talkativeness of this character. As spies say: if you don’t want strangers privy to your plans, under no circumstances keep a diary! This also applies to social networks: it is there that you should not store information that could be turned against you. If the reasons for your nervous state are serious enough, then the plan for getting out of it should be as secret as that of an intelligence agent. It’s another matter when part of the intended actions involves putting some information into the public domain. But this should be a thoughtful and balanced post, taking into account the reaction to it of various groups of subscribers and guests of your page. It all depends on the nature and scale of the stressful situation.When everything is annoying
The state when you are ready to burst into flames like a match does not arise overnight. This must be preceded by a series of failures or experienced stress, to which it was simply not possible to immediately react violently. Then all the negativity slips into the subconscious, making harmful changes there, and behold: a pretty, friendly creature suddenly turns into a real fury. “Don’t approach her!” - colleagues or acquaintances will say about you. And if you have any kind of leadership position, then you will turn into a person from whom you cannot even beg snow in winter. And those around you will have no idea that you yourself feel bad in your soul, so you always lash out at your subordinates. But to break this vicious circle, you need to start with yourself, because everything around you cannot suddenly become bad, unlike your mood. What needs to be done for this? Figure out what was the catalyst for your resentment towards the whole world. What exactly brought you to this state of mind? Most likely, it was some carelessly spoken word, an accidentally thrown remark, or some insignificant event, in the form of a torn buckle from a favorite shoe or a stain that won’t come off from a new blouse. In other words, this was the last straw that overflowed the cup of your patience. From that moment on, literally everything became infuriating. So, you need to catch exactly this last drop and analyze what happened before it? Maybe some more powerful stress that you seem to have coped with, but there are still unsaid things, unresolved questions and contradictions. That is, you agreed with the situation, but morally you couldn’t accept it, and you couldn’t change it either. There may be two ways out: either you change your attitude towards what happened, or you return to this problem and solve it differently. The main thing is not that you emerge victorious, but that you stop lying to yourself that everything is fine, everything is fine, although there is a residue in your soul. Understand yourself and act! And in this you will find your peace.After a breakup
One of the most powerful stresses comes from the breakup of a loving or married couple. The only thing worse can be the death of a loved one, but it is not for nothing that the popular song sang: “Parting is a little death,” because it seems that a person who refuses to meet or live together with you is irretrievably lost. This is why many people cannot quickly recover after their husband announced that he is leaving for someone else, or the guy said that he no longer likes you, and that he dreamed of something completely different from you. We do not realize that building a love relationship is a strategic task dictated by the universe itself. And this task is the continuation of the human race. And we were created this way, capable of love, only in order to preserve the family for as long as possible, in order to give the same love to the children born. And even if we just see one love that is at risk, then our subconscious sees in this the collapse of everything - procreation, the inability to no longer find a foothold in life, etc. It's like the ground is disappearing from under your feet. This is why such intense emotional pain can accompany a breakup. And it is precisely this state of mind that does not make it possible to correctly assess the situation and analyze it from beginning to end. Surprisingly, not every relationship breakup is permanent. Sometimes a person can come to his senses and return. As long as you are not connected to him by family ties, the guy believes that he has the right to choose the best one for himself. For some, it’s normal to have an affair with another girl in order to “make sure that his first choice is still better”! Yes, these are exactly the kind of excuses that friends often hear from a guy when they decide to shame him for his frivolous attitude towards his girlfriend. If this happens to a guy, then you need to gain composure, fold your hands like a pretzel and say: “Well, well, let’s see what comes of this...” If possible, say this not to yourself, but to him. If a young man sees your self-confidence, then he may well give up in front of her and not try to have an affair on the side anymore. Even spouses who left the family return, not to mention boyfriends. A husband who has fled to his mistress may suddenly realize that she is not such a good wife and will leave her. Where should he go if not to his home? Especially if he has children there. Beg your wife's forgiveness - and the job is done!Bouncing back after divorce
It happens that a love triangle situation leads to divorce. It is very difficult when a man is the initiator of a breakup. This means that he leaves for his mistress, and she becomes his legal wife. As a rule, such an act causes great psychological trauma to an ex-and very loving wife, and it can be incredibly difficult to pull yourself out of this state. Some ladies turn to psychologists or psychotherapists because they are unable to overcome the sadness that has fallen on them. However, in most cases, it is women who initiate divorces. Representatives of the fair sex can radically break off relationships. And although men are still successful in terms of earning big money and building a career, the weaker half of humanity still has some trump cards to feel more independent. On the one hand, a woman still stands at the stove after work, cleans the apartment on weekends, etc., but she absolutely does not need to look for someone who will do it for her. Just as she managed the housework herself before, she will continue to cope. Men's housework is episodic. A specialist called to your home can fix a broken water tap or burnt-out wiring, and an employee or neighbor, or even migrant workers from a neighboring construction site, can hang a cornice or shelf. This is why it is much easier for a woman to declare that she no longer needs a husband: you cannot buy her with delicious borscht or buns. Men themselves often forget that they need to constantly win over their weaker half: take them to restaurants, buy perfume, beautiful clothes, go on vacation together. That’s why they are often surprised when their wives tell them they are ready to divorce. Of course, a husband’s inertia is not yet a reason for divorce, but if instead of compliments a woman constantly hears her husband’s reproaches, and even worse, if he raises his hand against her, then this is a good reason not to tolerate such a tyrant in the house. Groundless jealousy is also a common reason why a woman either really begins to have affairs on the side, or breaks off relations with her husband, whose claims can no longer be tolerated. But here’s what’s surprising: many women, even after the divorce they initiated, continue to follow their ex-husbands and even get jealous when they start an affair with another woman. It is quite difficult to explain such an extremely irrational approach to the situation from a logical point of view. Here either vindictiveness or false intentions during a divorce plays a role. If you are vindictive, you will wish your ex that nothing will work out for him on the personal front, at least until it works out for you. If you are not vindictive, but simply jealous, then it turns out that you initiated the divorce in vain. You just had to give your husband an ultimatum: either he stops being outrageous, or he leaves. But if you still love him, then you shouldn’t break up with him completely. If you thought that he was the last moral monster who could not be allowed close to either you or your children, then you should only feel better because he found himself another passion. This is a complete guarantee that he will stop knocking on the threshold of your house. But ex-husbands often do not stop and periodically visit to “check their property,” and such visits are often extremely unpleasant. Divorce should be seen as a path to a new, free life, where you can do whatever you want:- devote yourself to children; find another husband; go traveling without fear of becoming a victim of someone’s delusions of jealousy; start your own business.
After bereavement
The real reason for sadness is when someone dear to you dies. It will not only be about the possible death of her husband. It’s hard after the loss of a grandmother or grandfather, parents, beloved aunt, friend. Any person who was in your environment and played a role in your destiny is always dear, and if death takes him, it is extremely difficult to recover from this. Locking yourself in a room, and at the same time in yourself, is not the best solution. It is no coincidence that funerals were invented, which attract many people who knew the deceased. It is no coincidence that these people also gather for funerals. When we meet those who can tell us something about the untimely departed, our souls somehow become warmer, it seems that this person is still with us, he just left somewhere. On other days there is no need to close yourself off from the world and spend time communicating. If you are a believer, then you can pray and go to your confessor. If the church occupies a small place in your life, then just try to be with friends, acquaintances, and do something more often. Sometimes it helps to read esoteric books, from which you can get much more information about the immortality of the soul than from what the official religion offers us. When you really believe that the departed person is now in heaven or that he will find a much more successful incarnation in a new body, it will be easier to cope with the loss. Just don’t let yourself be drawn into a sect: sectarians often take advantage of someone’s grief to convert them to their faith.After experiencing stress or a strong quarrel
What caused the stress? If some person is to blame, against whom you don’t seem to hold a grudge, then you will subconsciously consider yourself to be guilty. All you need to do is call him to negotiations and make sure that he also takes a share of the moral responsibility for the conflict. And this should not be revenge, but rather an educational process. After all, if you leave another person’s offense forgiven when he has not repented, then he will continue to do evil to others, without even thinking about the fact that he is wrong. As for you, without talking and dotting the “E”, you will be disappointed in the world around you. Usually in a conflict situation both parties are to blame. Someone fanned the fire, someone did not want to listen, one thing after another - and they came to an insoluble contradiction. Sometimes you have to look for a person who can look at the situation from the outside, understand it and reconcile both sides. But each must carry out certain spiritual work in her consciousness in order to no longer allow such quarrels and not hold a grudge. Stress can also be the result of a road accident, an accident, or a raging natural disaster. There is such a thing as “force majeure circumstances.” If a flood has damaged all your property, this is very stressful. It will not be possible to return everything back. But you will have the opportunity to receive compensation and even reconsider something, arrange your life differently. For example, generally move to a better place. After an accident, sometimes you may not be able to recover your car. But you can be glad that you yourself remained alive and relatively unharmed. Some people even receive irreparable injuries, but find a reason to enjoy life, or even an opportunity to return to their former profession. Let's remember the famous rock musician Rick Allen from the group Def Leppard. In a car accident, the young man lost his left arm, but this did not stop him from continuing his musical career. He plays percussion instruments mainly with his feet, with the help of several pedals, and, of course, with his right hand. The group performed all over the world and released albums, but this was preceded by a year when the rest of its members waited for their comrade to recover from the accident. He had a support point - friends. You probably have them too. And they will help in difficult times.
- "hugs"; dream; food; a glass of water; bath or shower; physical activity; communication with pets; needlework.
How to calm yourself down if you're very nervous
Nervous tension can also arise in anticipation of some events, and not after them. The unknown is scary, and when you realize that the outcome of an action depends not only on you, it can be difficult to control yourself and not panic. But a nervous state is a bad adviser, especially when you need to concentrate as much as possible. Before the exam You should always remember that you can retake the exam if you cannot pass it right away or if you are not satisfied with the grade. If you are well prepared, you will worry less than if you don’t know anything. If you have questions (tickets) for the exam, then divide their number by the number of days allotted for preparation in order to evenly distribute the load on the brain and nervous system. Planned actions will give you even more peace of mind. Before a job interview Here you need to remember that at any one company where you want to get a job, the world is not a wedge. It is likely that you yourself will not be suitable, but the chosen workplace will not be suitable for you. For greater self-confidence, you need to choose several companies at once where you will go for an interview. Now not only can you be chosen, but you can do it too. Always be on horseback! Before an important event in your life (wedding, birth of a child) Have you decided to get married so that you can have offspring soon? It shouldn't bring anything other than a positive attitude. A wedding is generally a holiday. So why bother yourself? It used to be, when sometimes the bride and groom were just getting acquainted at a wedding, and their parents decided everything for them, then there was a reason for great excitement. Today, few people decide to connect their entire lives with a stranger. Therefore, all reasons for excitement should be left behind by the time of the wedding celebration. But you need to prepare for the birth of a child not only physically, but also mentally. Being a mother is difficult, caring for a baby when you have little strength yourself is not easy. But you need to know that caring for a baby is not a routine. After all, this is a living person who still doesn’t realize much, but already loves you. And you are his. Love overcomes all difficulties. It is childbirth that causes more concern, since this process is painful and does not always go smoothly. Sometimes pregnancy, especially the first one, contributes to a nervous state. During pregnancy Poor health is, unfortunately, a frequent companion of a pregnant woman. The body works in an unusual mode, sometimes even experiences overload, but on the whole it copes with it. But how can a woman know how her next illness will end? But now she is responsible not only for herself, but also for the unborn child, which is why she begins to panic. Doctors add fuel to the fire by scolding the pregnant woman for her extra pounds, without even looking at the medical record, where weight loss due to toxicosis was previously noted. They scold you for high or low blood pressure, for low hemoglobin, and sometimes they recommend eating something that a woman cannot afford or has simply never eaten due to individual intolerance or lifestyle. But you just need to remember that you can change the doctor, even if you are covered by compulsory medical insurance. And also that pregnancy is considered one of the normal conditions of a woman. You need to read more useful literature so as not to pay attention to the unfounded claims of doctors. You need to be ready for anything, but believe only in the good. A person who has not yet been born needs to be loved and talked to. If this does not help, then you need to enroll in a yoga section for pregnant women or simply go to special auto-training classes. Such schools for young mothers are often organized at family planning centers or at antenatal clinics. And if you live in a village, where all these institutions are far from, then just listen to the advice of older women who have already had to give birth, and maybe more than once. The unknown is scary. Here, when you know more, you sleep better. Before surgery Surgery is no less stressful for the body than childbirth. And sometimes even more. After childbirth, a woman’s body produces endorphin, aptly called the hormone of happiness, as determined by physiology. It helps the whole body to recover well, but for the postoperative period nothing of the kind is “provided” by nature. Therefore, the production of the necessary hormones depends only on your mood. If you believe that the operation will bring benefit, and its absence will cause harm or death, then you will agree to surgery with joy. Are you afraid of general anesthesia? Then you need to talk to the anesthesiologist before the operation and discuss what you fear most:- allergies; do not recover from anesthesia; that your consciousness will suffer.
How to control yourself during a panic attack without medication
First you need to understand what this newfangled term “panic attack” is. In some incomprehensible way, it has gone beyond medical diagnoses, and now everyone who is not too lazy uses it in relation to any fear or stress. Doctors understand a panic attack as systemic manifestations, both from the psyche and in the form of organic lesions. During a panic attack, a person may vomit, his heart begins to pound, it becomes difficult to breathe, he feels either hot or cold. Of course, with such symptoms you need to consult a doctor. But less intense manifestations of panic, in which not all of these symptoms are observed, but perhaps only one, you can try to overcome yourself. If it is not the somatic, but the emotional component that predominates, then you can try to come to your senses on your own, without resorting to the help of strangers in general, and not just doctors. Put everything aside for a moment and come to your senses If you have firmly decided that you need to come to your senses on your own, then first of all leave the conflict zone. If you are panicked by the director’s scolding, then leave his office, you can go out into the courtyard or the nearest square, if it is not separated by a busy road. After all, you first need to stop being very nervous in order to adequately respond to dangers. If you are pissed off by a phone call, then stop the conversation and turn off the device altogether. If you were working at this moment, then put aside your work and be distracted by something more pleasant. Office workers are advised to switch to a computer game or browse websites on abstract topics. But for those who work in dangerous work, it is better to call in sick and go to the rest room to recover. Meditation or prayer to calm the soul It is much easier for a believer to come to his senses, because he feels the support of a Higher Power. Those who practice yoga or meditate also find it much easier to cope with emotions. Learning to meditate is not as difficult as it seems. Today there are many websites that provide instructions on how to begin the meditation process. As for yoga, some people are put off by the difficulty of performing asanas. But breathing exercises are also yoga, and you can perform them even while sitting on a chair, and not on the floor in the lotus position. You can also study breathing using the Buteyko system, which is excellent for achieving good health and tranquility. Relax: drink water, coffee or eat chocolate Oddly enough, coffee and chocolate, which are considered tonic foods, have a calming effect in this situation because they give strength, and strength, in turn, gives confidence. If a person is confident in himself, then he realizes that he is about to find a way out of the current situation. And when the action plan is in your pocket, the panic goes away by itself, giving way to swiftness and energy. Accept the situation and look for a way out There are situations that cannot be changed. Take, for example, being fired from your job. On the one hand, this is a loss of stable income, on the other hand, it is a great opportunity to switch to freelancing or look for more attractive vacancies than the place from which you were asked. This is a chance to make new useful contacts in the business field. Finally, this is a reason to rest, especially if management chronically did not allow you to go on vacation. Temporary absence from work gives us more freedom of action and a unique opportunity to change our profession if we have wanted to do this for a long time. That is, you accept the situation with dismissal and look for a way out in the form of rest, obtaining a new specialty, enrolling in studies or even promotion, but in a new team and with different management. In the same way, divorce gives more freedom. You can understand that a coward, a lazy person, a tyrant has left you. And you have a huge field of activity. First, accept the situation and just take a break from the men in your life. Well, then - all the bachelors become your potential suitors, you just have to choose carefully...How to learn not to worry or cry over trifles
Alas, often previously experienced severe stress makes us less susceptible to little things. But deliberately driving yourself into a stressful situation is extremely unwise. It is necessary to benefit from the stories of other people who in reality experienced almost apocalyptic events, emerging from them unharmed. If among your friends there is no one who survived a fire, a flood or a serious car accident, or perhaps got out of a foreign prison safely, then just read adventure literature, become imbued with the fate of the main characters, and this should also help. You just need to at least mentally try to balance between life and death in order to understand how minor insults and pricks of fate are insignificant to waste your nerves on.How to calm a guy (husband, friend) when he is nervous and feels bad
If a beloved man or just a friend finds himself in a stressful situation, then he needs something slightly different than we women. Representatives of the stronger sex are proud creatures, true leaders by nature. Even if a guy looks like a pure nerd, then a true knight probably lives in his soul. So, the pity of such a person can simply humiliate, and not calm. The man is not waiting for consolation, but for some action that could give him hope. If you don’t have not only plan “A”, but even plan “B” to get out of the situation, then you just need to let your friend or lover know: “I’m with you!” Empathy and support work wonders. It is quite possible that the way out of an unenviable situation will become less vague if not just one person, but two people think about it.
Good news for those who struggle to cope with daily stress at home and work: There are affordable ways to relieve constant worry and anxiety. The author of a new book on stress recommends using simple acupressure exercises as first aid. Changing our reaction to stress is also within our power; to do this, we need to understand the work of the adrenal glands.
Any stress we attribute to our emotional state—such as anxiety, low self-esteem, or overreaction—is actually related to our physiology. These so-called “false feelings” are caused by a deficiency in the brain's chemical response that can support resistance to stress. However, such conditions can be quickly corrected by changing your physiology.
I asked Harvard University integrative medicine specialist Sarah Gottfried, MD, how to stop feeling like a failure if you can't live every moment of your life like you're a superhero. She suggested a new mantra: “It’s my adrenal glands, it’s not me.” According to Gottfried, we should stop blaming ourselves and trying to jump in over our heads, and instead should “think about our biology.”
Stress and the adrenal glands: how does it work?
Up to 70% of people who report stress actually suffer from some degree of adrenal imbalance (the organs that produce the hormones that control your response to stress). Under conditions of chronic stress, our body goes through three stages, which are characterized by varying degrees of adrenal imbalance and ultimately adrenal depletion.
At the first stage we accumulate extra energy to cope with stressors. After the first surge of adrenaline, the adrenal glands begin to secrete cortisol, which initially - and in small quantities - is a source of strength and endurance for us. In the right amount, cortisol helps metabolize food, fight allergies, and reduce inflammation.
But if the state of excessive arousal continues, the adrenal glands begin to secrete too much adrenaline and cortisol, replacing them with our feel-good neurotransmitters, namely serotonin (the source of self-confidence and optimism) and dopamine (the source of pleasure). When cortisol chronically circulates in the body, it begins to stimulate inflammatory responses and can cause the very diseases it was originally intended to protect against. Accordingly, signs of disease or infection appear.
We no longer experience the “euphoria” associated with the adrenaline rush; instead bad mood or even depression appears. Too much or too little cortisol can lead to decreased concentration and a feeling of being overwhelmed. We resort to external stimulants - caffeine, salty or sweet foods. We exhaust ourselves even more by playing sports, or, conversely, we stop all physical activity. We begin to feel chronic fatigue and irritation.
At the last stage Adrenal imbalance causes such damage to these organs that they are no longer able to produce enough stress hormones. Every minor problem now seems like a global catastrophe. From now on, for example, when your son spills milk or your manager gives you a disapproving look, it is truly the end of the world for you.
Adrenal Fatigue: How to Avoid?
We all experience this condition - from time to time. But if this is your normal lifestyle, your body may be at risk of adrenal fatigue. “A high-sugar, low-protein diet triggers stress responses without us realizing it,” says best-selling author and nutritionist Julia Ross. Ironically, more than 70% of people eat the most unhealthy foods precisely in order to get rid of emotional stress. We could all do with getting our stress hormones checked so we know exactly where on the adrenal fatigue spectrum we each currently fall.
Instead of struggling through the thorns of stress or anxiety (and then beating yourself up for it), it's worth learning as much as possible about your physiology. You can do a saliva test using a test sold at a pharmacy, or you can take a blood test at any health care facility that can help you interpret the results. Then, using the medications prescribed to you, you can restore normal hormone levels in the adrenal glands.
Many experts recommend starting with nutrition - making the necessary changes to your diet and observing the improvements. Start with small but consistent dietary changes (such as a diet high in protein and gluten-free vegetables), take natural vitamins and supplements (more B vitamins and omega-3 fish oil, for example), and try natural herbs (such as rhodiola for focus and balance; chamomile or passionflower to stimulate the “calming” parts of your brain).
Now I want to tell you some secret tricks that will instantly boost your self-confidence and reduce your anxiety levels.
4 quick ways to get rid of anxiety
One of the components of high stress resistance is the ability to pull yourself together and remain calm and confident, no matter what happens around you. You can do this with the following exercises.
What is the benefit of acupressure exercises, that is, pressing on biologically active points on the hands? Many nerve endings are concentrated at the fingertips. Folding your fingers in various combinations and holding them in this position for a specific time applies healing pressure to certain nerve endings. These positions of the hands and fingers can stimulate the expression of various qualities (for example, fearlessness, confidence, a sense of power and peace) in the person performing this exercise, and can have a healing effect in case of various health problems.
In fact, you have the key to the internal medicine cabinet.
Exercise 1: Panic Switch Off Point
If you, like many people, are nervous about public speaking, use the following acupressure point, which I call the “panic switch off point.”
Hand position: With your thumb, touch the “knuckle” of your middle (third) finger. Then move your thumb toward your palm until you feel a “soft” indentation or small depression. The pressure should be moderate. By pressing this point you help regulate pressure and reduce anxiety.
Exercise 2: Confidence Point
To stimulate a state of confidence, try pressing the “confidence point.” By pressing this point, you send a signal that reduces internal emotional stress, stimulating a state of calm. Place your hands in the appropriate position for at least 30 seconds before a speech, presentation, or any other time when you need a confidence boost.
Hand position: Place the thumb of either hand on the side of the index finger between the first and second knuckles. Apply light to moderate pressure.
Exercise 3: Breathing technique to get rid of fear
You can train your body to let go of fear. Vigorous exhalations stimulate the PNS, promoting calm. I used this breathing technique to relieve claustrophobia so that I could live easier in New York, where crowded subways and elevators are a part of life.
Breathing technique: Take vigorous inhalations through your nose and exhale through your mouth, concentrating on each inhalation and exhalation. As you exhale, forcefully throw your arms forward, as if you are pushing something away from you that you don’t like. Then, as you inhale, return your arms to your chest in a straight line, elbows pressed to your sides. Exhale sharply through your mouth, throwing your arms out again. Repeat again.
Hand position: Place the tips of your thumb and index finger together and raise your arms in front of your chest, palms facing away from you.
Duration: Start by performing this exercise for one minute, gradually increase the training time to three minutes. When you do the exercise for the first time, you may feel a little dizzy—just stop if you feel any discomfort.
Exercise 4: Hand Positions to Encourage Solution Searching
To solve problems effectively, you must be confident in your abilities and listen to your intuition. The following hand position can be used to activate the problem-solving brain center. This position helps you focus your attention on a point on your forehead that corresponds to the approximate location of your pineal gland and is located at the intersection of the left and right hemispheres. This point is access to “whole-brain thinking.” In some spiritual and physical yoga traditions, it is considered the “third eye”—the intersection of intuition and wisdom.
Hand position: Connect the tip of the thumb of your right hand with the tips of the second (index) and third (middle) fingers. Place the "top" of this triangle about 2.5 cm from a point on the forehead that is about 2.5 cm above the point directly between the eyes. At the same time, connect the tip of the thumb of your left hand with the tips of the second (index) and third (middle) fingers in the same way. Place the "vertex" of this triangle about 2.5 cm from the point on your forehead that will correspond to your "intuition".
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Discussion
My daughter changed schools as a teenager - this is a big problem. New team, new teachers. There was anxiety, poor sleep, and absent-mindedness. We started drinking glycine forte at night, 1 tablet. The result was not long in coming. New friends appeared and school improved.
16.10.2018 21:07:32, Elizaveta SimonovaI'm always in a good mood))
I hope it helps me
Comment on the article "Stress, anxiety, panic: how to get rid of it? 4 quick ways"
Discussion
There is no need to give anything.
A change of activity, a change of topics of conversation, walks, some suitable physical activity, massage, a good positive atmosphere at home, no feeling of oppression and fatality of what is happening.
With these medications you will only aggravate the significance of what is happening in the child’s mind.
Life goes on as usual, and exams take their course - and the exams will end very soon, but life will go on.
Keep an eye on your mood.
Don't demonize these exams.
Try Brahma Rasayana.
28.03.2018 22:58:44, atRecommend a sedative. Pharmacies, medicines and vitamins. Medicine and health. +1 It helps me a lot exactly when I need it. Pharmacies, medicines and vitamins. Marin, the doctor prescribed me Persen (this was in the first trimester, so that I wouldn’t...
Discussion
Drink Morozov drops at night. You can’t take sedatives while driving, vigilance becomes dull
Yes, there is such a magic wand and it’s called tenoten. It can be taken by those who are driving, since it does not cause any drowsiness or other side effects. He helped me a lot at the time. I recommend
Discussion
Glycine was dosed correctly. You can and should drink it in the fall and winter. It is good for brain function and harmless. Do not give anything before the exam. Most often this causes lethargy and drowsiness. It will be even worse.
Go to bed at the right time before the exam. In the morning, have a light breakfast and drink tea with sugar. Glucose is food for the brain. That's why chocolate is recommended for exams. We were always told to scoop up a couple of pieces of refined sugar and eat it right before the exam.
In general, you need to learn and nothing will be scary for those who know. There are still so many exams ahead.... and they are studying just to understand their shortcomings and eliminate them.
I give Afobazol.
Pharmacies, medicines and vitamins. Medicine and health. Section: Pharmacies, medicines and vitamins. What to drink so as not to cry. Girls, my son’s graduation is tomorrow, and I’m very emotional in general and at such moments in particular, I shouldn’t cry...
The question is: is it possible to somehow change the reaction to stress? But this is not the first time that I have switched off due to extreme stress. It’s just that this is a very good example, which clearly shows that even the possibility of losing a child does not allow...
The above drugs are not at all terrible, I have studied the issue extensively - they are quite used in the modern world - they just have a strong side effect, so they are not recommended for the elderly. Painkillers, pain relievers, pain relievers.
There are two types of stressful situations. When we actually have something to worry about, and when there is no real reason to worry. If you are running through the forest right now from a wild boar, then any advice we give you on how to calm down and stop being nervous in stressful situations is unlikely to seem effective to you. It’s very difficult to remain calm and cool at such a moment, isn’t it? But in general, if you think about it, the fact that you are currently experiencing a lot of stress does you a huge favor, because thanks to the release of adrenaline into your blood, you find the strength to run.
On the other hand, if you are sitting for an interview or have a regular ordinary exam, and you are waiting for your turn in front of the audience, and nothing threatens your safety at this moment, but you feel that your hands are shaking, your palms are sweating, you are pounding, you If you can’t pull yourself together, then such stress can hardly be called natural. Because not all people experience it. When you were studying at the university, there were probably people in your group who absolutely did not understand what anyone could worry about here; they ran to answer the questions first and, thanks to this, could leave before everyone else. So, such anxiety usually does not bring any benefit to a person. In order to figure out how to get rid of it, let's first talk about where it comes from, and then what to do about it and how to defeat it.
Reasons why you are so scared?
Physiological reasons.
1. Problems with the spine.
Pinched nerve roots can be a cause of anxiety. There are even studies on this topic that show a very clear relationship, for example, this study on Mood and anxiety disorders in patients with chronic low back and neck pain caused by disc herniation.
2. Endocrine disorders.
Diabetes mellitus, thyroid diseases, etc.
A drop in blood sugar can also cause feelings of fear and intense anxiety for no reason.3. Nutrition.
For example, caffeine abuse.
In the article, we said that people who drink a lot of coffee in the afternoon often complain of high levels of nervousness.Psychological reasons.
1. The habit of worrying.
You most likely have anxious parents. Children always copy the behavior patterns of their parents. It is difficult to have a strong nervous system and not experience nervousness if this is a pattern of behavior that you have observed since childhood. Your parents most likely adopted this from their parents, or acquired this habit due to other reasons, which we will describe below.
2. A bad experience that your brain remembers.
Did you know that in order to remember something for a very long time, or even forever, you need to add an emotional coloring to this event or information.
If a situation happened to you in which you experienced very strong discomfort and fear, and you did not have the opportunity to quickly stop this discomfort, for example, you were stuck in an elevator and the lights were turned off. The dispatch button didn't work, it was Friday and you were afraid you'd have to sit there all weekend. Then, of course, the next time you enter a closed room, you will be afraid of repetition.
Or, for example, at the school where you studied, your teacher, for some personal reason, disliked you and constantly made fun of you in front of the whole class, and since man is a social animal, the fear of being rejected by other people is quite strong for most people . And therefore, when giving a presentation at work or sitting for an exam, those emotions that you once experienced will remind you of yourself again and again, because this situation will seem similar to your brain.
3. You have been trained. The coming of the end of the world.
There is another option related to family upbringing. This is when parents are not nervous, but overly strict and aggressive. Well, for example, you were always punished for a bad grade.
Or your parents were inclined to exaggerate any of your mistakes, you tore your jacket - it’s the end of the world, you didn’t wash the dishes - a scandal, and now, even if no one punishes you for your mistake, your brain will experience anxiety. He's so used to it.
How to calm down and stop being nervous in stressful situations? What to do?
First you need to understand which of the reasons is yours. Sit and remember. If you suspect that the cause of your unreasonable fear is physiological, then you should consult a doctor or adjust your diet if that is the cause. If the reason is psychological, then once you understand the reason, you may feel a little better. And then you can use our tips.
1. In order to learn how to stop being nervous and worried, you will have to be a little nervous and worried. Clinical psychologists will call this method cognitive therapy, and ordinary people will say that this method is called “look your fear in the eye” (or in the face - which is correct?). The point is to put yourself in the situation that makes you anxious. But do not forget that we are talking about situations that are safe for you, in which you experience unjustified discomfort.
Well, for example, you get very nervous at interviews, which means that to stop being nervous, you need to go through 20-30-40 interviews.Or you are afraid to ride in an elevator - you will have to ride it 10 times a day.
Those. if you had some bad experience or behavior model adopted from your parents, then you change it by creating new successful experiences and new behavior models.
It will be scary at first, but over time the anxiety will subside and you will feel better.
2. Allow fear to be. Don't fight it, but accept it. And ideally, even try to deliberately strengthen it. This method is called the method of paradoxical intention. Those. If you are giving a presentation and you feel like you are going to faint from excitement, then you need to force yourself to faint. As you understand, no one succeeds, and causeless anxiety recedes by itself.
3. Actually try to breathe a little. Don’t throw this option aside because “it’s some kind of bullshit.” And slowly, inhale and exhale, inhale and exhale over and over again. This helps a lot of people.
4. Strengthen your nervous system as a whole.
Play sports. Don't overload yourself with negative information. Choose positive films and music. Learn not to get hung up, to switch from problems to business - in fact, this is also a skill, a habit that anyone can instill in themselves if they wish.
I would like to leave one more piece of advice for the conclusion of this article. This advice is about another good way to stop being nervous and worried. In order to relieve anxiety, you need to get very angry with yourself and tell yourself that you are really going to allow stupid fears and anxiety to constantly ruin your life. And if you really succeed, then perhaps you can finally achieve the long-awaited peace and your fears will recede.
In the modern world, with its accelerated pace of life, the need to constantly solve many problems and regular stressful situations, the question often arises of how to calm yourself. Not everyone has the opportunity or desire to seek help from psychologists, especially since sometimes there is simply no time for this. This article offers effective methods that will help you quickly calm yourself down and stop being nervous even in the most difficult situation.
8 proven ways to calm yourself:
Breathing exercises
Proper breathing can quickly change our state and restore lost calm. This method should not be neglected due to its apparent simplicity, because managing your emotions with the help of inhalations and exhalations is the basis of many spiritual practices. Thus, an important aspect of yoga is pranayama - breathing exercises that calm the mind and promote deep relaxation. Simple practices are available to every person; you just need to know certain nuances of their implementation.
Breathing on a count
A simple technique will help you achieve inner peace: counting your inhalations and exhalations. All exercises should be performed with a straight back, preferably in a sitting position. So, close your eyes, let go of all thoughts and just breathe freely. After this, begin to take a deep breath and exhale for 4 counts. It is important that the process is as smooth as possible; no discomfort should arise during the exercise. There should be no pauses after exhalation and before inhalation; breathing must be natural. You should focus on counting, trying to ignore extraneous thoughts and images. Very soon you will notice that you have been able to calm down and now look at the problem from a different angle.
Affirmation
Do you want to calm down in a stressful situation? Create an image of yourself as peaceful and relaxed. To do this, you can repeat simple affirmations - positive statements that will quickly change your mood. These phrases should not contain the word “not”; their simplicity and conciseness are also important. In this situation, the following positive statements would be ideal: “I am completely calm,” “I am happy and calm,” “I have peace and tranquility in my soul.” After just a few repetitions, you will notice that there is no trace left of the previous nervousness. The most important thing is to believe in what you say, otherwise it will be difficult to achieve the desired mood.
Contact with water
To calm your frayed nerves, you can take a shower, doing it right. Water is capable of taking on negative information and energy, so contact with this element can really help a person quickly calm down. To enhance the effect, you can ask the water to wash away all the negativity from you. In this case, it is recommended to take a shower, and with warm water, since contrast procedures can further excite the nervous system.
Observing unpleasant thoughts
To get rid of obsessive thoughts that cause anxiety, you should not try to fight them violently; it is better to use the technique of calm contemplation. Find a quiet place to practice, close your eyes and simply observe your fears and worries. Do not get involved in the images that will pass before your eyes. It is important not to react to thoughts in any way, you need to allow them to simply be. There is no need for any assessments, because they are the ones that cause one or another attitude towards all phenomena. Very soon there will be pauses filled with silence. It is moments of thoughtlessness that give us the opportunity to experience the fullness of life and become who we really are.
If you manage to be an outside observer of your own thoughts, they will cease to have the same power over you. You will see that everything is not at all as you imagined. It is quite possible that the problem will resolve itself. In any case, your condition will definitely level out.
Walk
A change of activity will help change your condition, so if you are indoors, go outside and take a short walk. Fresh air and brisk walking will quickly clear unnecessary thoughts from your head and help you come to your senses.
Relaxing massage
How to calm yourself down? Do a head massage, because there are many nerve endings there, the impact of which will help change the condition. Approach this process consciously: expect that after the procedure your mood will improve and your nerves will stop acting up. After this, rub your forehead and temples with light massage movements, and also tap your fingers on the head from the forehead to the back of the head.
Pleasant smells
The healing properties of essential oils make them a very effective remedy in the fight against stress. To calm your nerves, add a couple of drops of lavender, tangerine or chamomile oil to the aroma lamp. Pleasant natural scents will help you relax and calm your nerves.
Dance improvisation
If you want to quickly calm down and relieve stress, we recommend doing movement meditation. Expressive dance will remove tension and blocks in the body and help you relax. There are no strict instructions, it is important to let your emotions go free, let them stop bothering you. Release the negativity with simple and intense movements, they can be absolutely anything: shaking, swaying or spinning. Don’t think about beauty, we are faced with another task - to calm ourselves down.
Certain techniques can help you calm down and stop being nervous, but none of them will eliminate the problem that caused the stressful situation. This is why it is important to work through your emotions and change their charge from negative to positive. One of the most negative habits is the constant feeling of guilt. This emotion is extremely destructive, as it leads to various ailments and mental disorders. As a rule, manipulators masterfully play on this feeling, because it is very easy to control a guilty person and get what you want from him. Think about it, perhaps your condition may simply be beneficial to someone, but why do you need it?
A serious conversation with loved ones, speaking in front of a large crowd of people, reporting to your superiors about the work done, passing an exam - these and other events often make a person “sweat.” All people are susceptible to anxiety, regardless of training, gender and age. A purely psychological feeling is an emotional experience that clouds the mind. The person cannot think or take any action. This raises the question of how to cope with anxiety.
What does anxiety lead to?
- low self-esteem;
- lack of confidence in one’s professionalism;
- weakness in the limbs, shortness of breath;
- inappropriate behavior in public (loss of self-control);
- severe stress and, as a result, prolonged depression;
- loss of appetite;
- complete lack of concentration, disorientation;
- negative result in solving a specific problem.
Exercises to combat anxiety
- When a person is worried, his breathing becomes irregular and his heart rate skyrockets. Try to calm down. Take several long breaths in and out with your eyes closed. Try to perform the manipulations slowly and confidently at the same pace. You should not puff out your cheeks or hold your breath; the diaphragm should open completely.
- Need to move. Perform a mill with your hands or wave them from side to side. Some public figures massage their hands when they are nervous before a performance. Do the same when shaking the lower extremities (massage of the feet and calves).
- Often, uncontrollable anxiety occurs due to a large release of hormones into the blood. To bring the indicator to the optimal level, gently pat yourself on the chest with your palm. Activation of the thymus gland will allow you to calm down faster by controlling hormonal imbalances.
- People who are very nervous before speaking behind the podium should get a small item. It is important that no one notices this thing during the speech. Handle a keychain (pen, lighter, paper clip, piece of fabric, etc.) in your hands. By doing this, you will calm your thoughts and take them in a different direction.
- If you have an important event coming up that you don’t have time to prepare for, take 2-5 minutes for a little trick. For a given period of time, first rise on your toes, then slowly lower. Next, roll your shoulders clockwise and counterclockwise. Alternate the movements of your limbs.
- When anxiety takes you by surprise right during serious negotiations, while at the table, begin to bend and straighten your toes. Try to focus on the sensations you receive, transferring your thoughts there. You can also squeeze your earlobes with all your might, the main thing is that your manipulation is invisible.
- An excited person looks constrained before a performance or other serious event. The muscles don’t seem to obey, so they need to be forced to work. If your legs are shaking, do 10-20 squats. In the case of hands, do push-ups from the floor or bench. Abdominal pumping and other physical exercises that can distract the body will not be amiss.
Method number 1. Prepare for the event
- Often, excitement takes people by surprise who are poorly prepared for the upcoming event. If you are soon planning a speech, report or performance, collect the necessary materials and literally memorize them.
- Practice in front of the mirror until you like yourself. Then gather friends or strangers (even better), speak in front of them and ask for an objective assessment.
- Think over your image in advance, namely makeup, hairstyle, clothes, shoes. You must look 100% perfect. Don’t forget to provide for incidents (torn tights, smudged mascara, bad pen, etc.).
- If you are soon giving a speech to a large group of people and then giving answers, think in advance about the possible questions that people will ask. Your answers should be brief but meaningful, and your speech should be confident and professional.
Method No. 2. Remember past victories
- In most cases, anxiety occurs due to low self-esteem and remembering past defeats. However, you need to come from the other side.
- Take a piece of paper and write down all your strengths. Don’t forget to mention your victories (defending your thesis with excellent marks, passing your license on your own, getting a prestigious position, etc.). Realizing your own professionalism will instantly relieve you of anxiety.
- Analyze past situations. Surely you were also worried before, but everything went well. So it is this time. Anxiety only confuses you, preventing you from focusing on what’s important. Say to yourself: “I will succeed!”, “I am confident and strong in what I do!”
Method No. 3. Increase your self-esteem
- People who are unsure of themselves and their own abilities often worry about anything. To get rid of emotional discomfort, you need to love yourself.
- Increase your self-esteem in any way possible. Join the gym, attend personal growth courses, overcome bad habits.
- Enlist the support of loved ones who will objectively evaluate your behavior. With every increase in self-esteem, anxiety will disappear.
Method number 4. Pause before your main speech
- This method will help you cope with anxiety in cases where your arms and legs tremble before a conversation (a formal speech, a performance, etc.). Don't start talking right away, wait 10-15 seconds.
- The specified period of time is necessary in order to “pull yourself together.” If you immediately start talking, your thoughts will be confused and disordered.
- A pause will help build a logical chain and partially relieve anxiety. This way you won’t forget the speech you’ve been preparing for for so long. Control your breathing, it should be smooth, without jumps.
Method No. 5. Don't be afraid to make a mistake
- There are often cases when a person’s hands begin to tremble for the most ridiculous reasons. On a subconscious level, all people who perform soon are afraid of making a mistake.
- It is important to understand that the audience will not throw eggs at you if you forget a word or drop your pen. Every person is imperfect, accept this statement.
- From now on, think differently. Think about the fact that a small mistake will not lead to dismissal, unless you directly call the boss an “asshole.”
- Throughout a serious conversation or speech, imagine shaved sheep trying to jump up a tree. Or make up another funny fantasy for yourself.
Prepare for the event thoroughly, study psychological techniques for dealing with anxiety. Play sports, believe in your own strengths, increase your self-esteem. Watch your breathing, don’t be afraid to make mistakes, remember past victories. Prepare a small thing that you can touch in your hands to normalize the psycho-emotional background.
Video: 5 effective ways to cope with anxiety
