They evoke warm, joyful emotions. Joy is an external manifestation of love, or what does “Always rejoice!” mean?

Joy is one of the main positive emotions and one of the main values ​​for a child. Children, unlike adults, show their feelings and emotions more openly: if they rejoice, then with all their hearts, if they have grief, then it is real. Children do not know how to be cunning, they do not know how to hide their feelings. And it would seem that with joy everything is clear: joy is good. But... How much time in our children's lives is allocated for joy? And are the violent manifestations of this joy actually allowed?

What is joy for a child?

This is when he is loved and desired, when mom and dad can always find time to play with him, and not put their household chores above communication with the child. After all, you see, you can put things aside for 15-20 minutes and play with your child, read with him - give him your time. Joy is when mom and dad are always ready to help when they understand him. Joy is seeing a rainbow in the sky after rain, running through puddles... I think this is a list you can continue.

What about us, parents?

A child with his irrepressible energy is able to enjoy himself all day long. And we get tired, we want to sit and relax for a while, to quickly finish some household chores. We are so exhausted that this restlessness and loud children's voices begin to irritate us. And in the end, we may simply be bored with what brings joy to our child.

Children's world healthy child consists entirely of joy: children are always able to find something exciting to do. And if they don’t have a cool fire truck or a toy thermometer at hand, any stick, pebble, or leaf can turn into them. Whatever is at hand. The game will still take place, because all it takes is a little desire and joy.

The joy of a child is his energy, his unsatisfied curiosity, his development. If you “extinguish” the baby’s energy, you extinguish the joy in him. Lethargic children are sad, depressed, obedient and passive. They are physically less developed, slow and timid, often bored and don’t know what to do with themselves.

If in your child’s life there is no place for joy, play, noise, fuss, shouting, partying, then this means that he did not have a childhood. This means that you will owe your child a childhood. And in a few years it will be completely late - you will never be able to repay this debt.

Manifestation Joy in children, like other feelings, occurs in different ways. Someone expresses it violently: with squealing, laughter. For example, when receiving a toy or thing as a gift that the child so wanted. He will jump and clap his hands with such joy, jump on your neck and kiss you. And another child in the same situation will simply smile and say thank you. And it is not necessary demand from such a child violent manifestations of feeling, criticize him for this. This is just how a child is, due to his individuality, character, and temperament.

But an important role here also plays family atmosphere. As a rule, it is correct to express your positive feelings and emotions can children from prosperous families, as well as children who see example manifestations of feeling. If the baby grows up in a family where the relationship between parents leaves much to be desired, where gifts are not a tradition, where they are accepted without much emotion (for example, when dad gives mom something as a sign of reconciliation after a quarrel, and she is ready to slap this gift in his face smear) - here you no longer have to expect the child to express joy correctly.

Therefore, dear parents, children need to be “taught” to show joy, just like other emotions and feelings. And they need to be taught through example, because a child is our mirror.

Let your baby be himself. Let him be a child - spontaneous, cheerful, inquisitive, restless.

The article contains information from open sources

The older we get, the less often we experience joy. We have forgotten how to experience this feeling due to the rush and bustle, the problems of the adult world, the race for success and the wrong conclusions. But there are many more reasons for joy than we think.

Sometimes in the adult world, joy has to be the solution. Long and short journeys, changing seasons, happy endings in interesting films, unexpected meetings, beautiful photos, my favorite thing, the upcoming weekend... I am happy when I understand that I have brought benefit, when I learn something new and unexpectedly interesting, when there isthoughts about pleasant happy events and plans for the future.

Psychological profile of joy

• Joy - active positive emotion, expressed in a good mood and a feeling of pleasure.
• Formedin childhood, when the child sees familiar faces, later - whenmanages to achieve something (reach a toy, build a tower of blocks, ride a bicycle for the first time).
• Bodily reactions- smile, laughter, a surge of energy throughout the body, you want to jump and make energetic movements.
• Fueled , positive outlook for life.
• Related concepts- , pleasure, satisfaction.
• Opposite feelings- sadness, grief, sadness.
• Psychosomatic diseases from lack of joy- possibly anemia, alcoholism, problems with arteries, veins, lymph nodes, cataracts.

Joy and happiness

We often put an equal sign between happiness and joy, but joy is rather a positive emotion, and happiness is a state of mind.

It is difficult to describe, because each person has his own concept and his own emotional condition which is associated with it. Psychologists' studies have shown that money, prestigious education and big house do not really affect the level of happiness. Those who won the lottery were no happier than those who were unlucky. If we do not apply any techniques to become happier (meditation, ), we will constantly return to our level of happiness, which, among other things, depends on heredity.

Happiness is the starting point within us. To experience it means to feel a connection with other people, with nature, with art, and to accept life and the world around as they are.

Joy can be experienced by both happy and unhappy people. She will make the happy even happier, and she will first cheer up the unhappy, and then make her unhappy again. We can't feel this way forever. Constant joy Tires and dulls the severity of positive emotions. It is possible to experience intense joy from both success and material things.When we experience it, processes occur that exclude negative feelings in any situation.

10 Random Facts About Joy

1. Anhedonia- a disorder in which a person cannot experience joy. Scientists believe that anhedonia occurs when a person's mental self-esteem system is blocked. This may be a consequence post-traumatic syndrome. For example, war participants become less sensitive to pleasure. Their psyche, protecting from negative emotions, blocks and positive ones. Post-traumatic stress is caused not only by such terrible events as war, but also by divorce and bullying at school.
2. A person with a stable joyful background is called optimist. Such people actively take on new things and usually have many friends around them.
3. The more joy we give to others, the more we receive in return.
4. The emotion of joy is less than happiness, but more than just a feeling of pleasure.
5. Parents cannot teach a child joy, but they can encourage children to experience joy by demonstrating this emotion.
6. U small child It is much easier to evoke the emotion of joy than in an adult.
7. The first joy experienced in infancy is associated with other people, so the most reliable source of this feeling for us is relationships with others.
8. Joy is experienced more vividly if there have been failures before it. Overcoming real and imagined obstacles brings great joy.
9. Gloat- a combination of joy and contempt.
10. Joy is often defined as the reaction to unexpectedly receiving something pleasant. The more unexpected and long-awaited the success, the greater the joy.

8 reasons to experience more joy

The main sources of joy for us are pleasant interactions with people, achieving goals, or overcoming difficulties. This emotion is closely related to self-esteem and self-confidence. When we experience joy, we are happy to share it with others.

1. Relaxing effect of joy protects us from the effects of stress associated with a constant desire for success.
2. Joy makes us bolder. We feel able to overcome difficulties and enjoy life.
3. Feeling joyful, we we feel loved and needed.
4. Joy helps to admire and Enjoying life. The desire to analyze and think critically disappears. We we perceive everything as it is, without trying to improve or change.
5. One of the most important functions of joy is the formation of feelings of affection and mutual trust between people. If communicating with someone brings joy, we are likely to trust and rely on that person.
6. When we experience this feeling, all body systems function easily and freely, the mind and body are in a relaxed state, and this peace allows you to restore energy.
7. Positive experiences speed up recovery and improve health.
8. Joy tends to grow. The more we enjoy life, the more reasons for joy we have.

Too much is not good

I used to think that positive emotions bring pure benefit and we must strive for them with all our might. But when I began to learn more, I realized that sometimes feeling too good is bad.

1. Excessive joy can make us less creative. According to research by Mark Alan Davis, when we experience intense, overwhelming joy, our creativity declines.
2. We tend to take more risks. When we are in a state of overjoy, we are more likely to take unnecessary risks because this emotion makes us feel completely secure and comfortable.
3. Not all joy is useful. We are used to calling many joys positive states, but it can be different. Sometimes this feeling gives us energy, sometimes it slows us down, sometimes it brings us closer to other people or makes us more noble. Sometimes the joy of winning over someone makes the loser overly proud or humiliates. Pride makes us focus on ourselves, causing discomfort to others and alienating us from people.
4. Excessive positive emotions make us callous. When we're on a high, it's harder for us to express empathy to someone who's struggling. We are more inclined to encourage, to assure that the world is beautiful and everything will be fine. But this will not help a person survive the situation.

Negative emotions are also important, it is better to experience joy in moderation - not too little, but not too much.

How to bring joy back to life

Our joy is our responsibility, it will not come simply because we wait and get upset when we lose it.

IN last time I was happy that the class was cancelled. Not because I’m too lazy to work or I don’t like what I do, but because a lot of unresolved issues have accumulated and the freed up time gave me a chance to do everything in a relaxed manner.

Next time we'll analyze anger.

Why are there still so many questions about what exactly this or that emotion is called? Why does even a simple smile look different among representatives of different cultures, even though it is based on the same structure of the emotion Joy.

The thing is that people learn emotions. Emotions are partially inherited, but otherwise, a person spends his entire life learning and relearning emotions. And learning a particular emotion occurs differently in different cultures. Our culture is no exception. Even in one particular culture, teaching emotions depends on the subcultural environment in which the child grows up. A child who is in the process of growing up will be taught only a certain range of emotions necessary to survive in this subculture. This is how they are formed individual differences in emotions, characterized by the appearance of stable relationships between Joy and other emotions. This is how emotions acquire additional emotion-comments that regulate their expression, display, and further actions taken.

For example, among Russians, the emotion Joy consistently manifests itself in conjunction with the emotions Sadness and/or Fear. What can be easily discovered similar attitude to Joy in proverbs that keep age-old wisdom: “The one who laughs last laughs”, “The boyar is happy with the jester, but does not walk in line with him”, “Where laughter lives, that is the sin”, “In the old days people were smarter, but now they are more cheerful”, “Whoever is funny , he is tearful”, “Laughter without a reason is a sign of a fool”, “Strong laughter leads to misfortune”, etc. As for other cultures, it may well be that Joy enters into stable relationships with other emotions, which is quite natural, since cultures and lifestyles are strikingly different.

Social function of Joy

The emotion of joy has a positive meaning not only for the formation mutual affection between parents and baby, but also affects the development social relations adult. If communicating with a person brings you joy, then you will probably trust this person and rely on him. Forming a sense of affection and mutual trust between people is extremely important function emotions of joy.

Joy and health

Joyful experiences are useful and beneficial for human body. When we experience joy, all systems of our body function easily and freely, the mind and body are in a relaxed state, and this relative physiological peace allows us to restore expended energy. According to the testimonies of many people who have suffered from a particular disease, joyful experiences speed up the healing process. Clinical researches show that the lack of positive social stimulation, which serves as a source of positive emotions interest and joy, can cause serious mental and physical disorders in a person.

There is an opinion that masochists experience pleasure from pain, that the sensation of pain gives them joy, this is wrong. Masochism is undoubtedly associated with disturbances of certain emotions, but Joy is not one of them. Perhaps the masochist inflicts pain on himself, satisfying the need for self-punishment generated by the emotion of Guilt.<Удовольствие>The feeling a masochist receives from the sensation of pain may be nothing more than a feeling of relief, which is caused by a weakening of the feeling of guilt. It is likely that it is the emotion of Guilt that gives rise to the masochist’s need to experience pain during sexual intercourse or to look for other ways to harm himself.

Purposeful training of the emotion Joy

Why is this happening?
If in an adult the emotion of joy cannot be planned, then in an infant and small child it can be completely caused. certain types stimulation. It is curious that the first smile of a newborn baby is always a social smile, it is caused by the presence of another person.

The process of development of the emotion Joy proceeds in a child somewhat differently than the process of development of other emotions. Parents cannot directly “teach” the child the emotion of Joy; they cannot build for him a model of behavior that is guaranteed to lead him to happiness. They can only entertain and amuse the child, involving him in games that help awaken the emotion of Joy in him, while at the same time showing it with themselves, with their behavior, with their facial expressions. Such experiences of joy are very important for the normal development of a child, but they are short-lived and depend on the spiritual generosity of the people around him. In the future, these experiences of joy will determine the ability to “resist” fears and depression and will determine the ability and desire to learn.

Obstacles standing in the way of experiencing joy

It must be admitted that various cultures and subcultures provide a person with different opportunities to experience Joy. Economic, social and cultural conditions, which generate boredom, fatigue and dissatisfaction in people, literally forcing people to fight for survival, contribute to resource-poor emotional experiences preventing the development of the emotion joy, and the emergence of a stable relationship between it and emotions leading to NOT a resource: narrowing the possibility of further choice.

Let us list the obstacles to self-realization that await a person literally at every step, blocking the path to Joy:

1. One of the most common barriers is created by the way we organize social institutions. Numerous rules and regulations, excessive control overwhelm creative activity people are encouraged by mediocrity and dullness.


2. Superficial, impersonal, overly hierarchical relationships between people.


3. A dogmatic approach to raising children, to issues of sex and religion complicate the process of self-knowledge and interfere with the development of self-confidence.


4. The blurred concepts of masculinity and femininity and the uncertainty of gender roles also impede self-knowledge and self-realization.


5. In addition to the above obstacles related to the sphere of personal and social functioning, bad health can become an obstacle to self-realization and joy. physical state person. A physically disabled person is limited in the possibilities of self-realization and in the experiences associated with it.


6. Lack of sleep or disruption of the sleep-wake cycle. The pineal gland, or pineal gland, located in the center of the brain, is responsible for alternating wakefulness and sleep. So, in the light of day, it produces serotonin, a substance called the pleasure hormone, or the hormone of happiness. If there is enough serotonin, we have good mood and life is a joy to us. And if it’s not enough, apathy, depression and despondency arise, depression or, conversely, increased aggressiveness, irritability, anxiety and restlessness. But when it gets dark outside, the pineal gland begins to produce another hormone - melatonin, which is responsible for healthy, full sleep. Darkness (preferably complete) and night - these are two the most important conditions for normal sleep. Produced only in the dark, melatonin not only has a hypnotic effect, but also promotes the restoration of the body: it normalizes the nervous, immune, cardiovascular system. It also has a rejuvenating effect and helps prolong our life.

Education (socialization) Joy

Since a joyful experience can be considered as a by-product of activities aimed at achieving some emotional meaningful goal then learning the emotion Joy acts as an unexpected bonus to social development child. A child easily learns what to fear, what causes Anger, Disgust, Contempt, but Joy cannot be learned this way. How does learning Joy happen?

Joy and Interest

So, for example, parents often take their children to the circus, in the hope that trained animals, aerialists and clowns will make the child happy, and when this does not happen, they are very surprised that children often feel sorry for the animals, which are mocked for the amusement of the crowd, and clowns in general ways to scare for life, especially if the people playing the makeup themselves do not have access to the Joy emotion.

But sometimes, when you manage to get a Joy bonus by showing interest, then a “Joy - Interest” relationship is formed, in which the structure of the emotion Interest is combined with the structure of the emotion Joy according to the rules of the Mathematics of Emotions.

In any case, in order for a person to “learn” some emotion, he must experience it at least once, must find out what trigger underlies this emotion. If parents themselves are capable of experiencing Joy, they know how to rejoice different people, various events and phenomena of the surrounding world, if the circle of Joy triggers is wide and varied enough, then the child will easily and independently model the ability to rejoice and form a joyful worldview.

Teaching Joy through Smile

Along with the appearance of a smile on the face, one can observe an increase in activity in the child: the appearance of generalized movements with alternate flexion, extension of the limbs, increased breathing, vocal reactions and increased blinking.
To sum it up:

• an adult can evoke a resource response in a child simply by providing him with visual and auditory stimuli and thereby developing his ability to visually concentrate;


• timely and complete satisfaction primary needs the baby creates conditions for resourceful emotional development;


• resourceful, supportive emotions for the infant contribute to the development of long-term and sustainable visual concentration

Laughter and Joy

1. sound (for example, a high-pitched voice)


2. tactile (for example, kissing a child on the tummy)


3. social (for example, playing hide and seek with a child)


4. visual (for example, a mother crawling on the floor)

A crying child prompts the mother to take care of him, to calm him down in the same way as in last time, while the mother’s attempts to make the child laugh and involve him in the game remain unsuccessful, the child stops the game with his indifference, prompting the mother to look for new stimuli for excitement. Thus, it is the child who, with his crying or laughter, initiates behavior associated with the interaction between mother and child, which is in a great way teaching a child the emotion of Joy and firmly associates laughter with it.

Humor and Joy

Games that evoke laughter in infancy create the preconditions for the development of a sense of humor; Ultimately, the ability to understand a sense of humor depends on how harmonious a person’s previous development was, how freely he could express those sudden bursts of joy that accompany some cognitive-affective processes. Interesting fact that trace arousal from both positive (in particular, sexual) and negative (causing suffering, fear) stimuli improves subsequent understanding of cartoons and jokes.

Men and women perceive humor and what people laugh at differently. Women, when they see people laughing, become more expressive and evaluate the caricatures offered to them much higher. In men, observing people laughing leads to a clearer differentiation between good and bad caricatures.
Those. women are more receptive to expressive reactions, to “the laughter of people at a party” as such, while men are more receptive to the content and “laugh more at jokes that accompany the learning process.”

Joy and cognitive processes

However, the emotion Joy, in conjunction with cognitive processes, may well lead to a decrease in thinking productivity. If solving a problem facing a person requires effort and hard work, then in Joy a person may well simply forget it, leaving it unsolvable. This paradoxical nature of the relationship “Joy - cognitive process” manifests itself in some situations, reducing motivation and affecting the speed of achievement.

Joy and the formation of addiction

There are two conditions for the formation of dependence:

• The physical or imaginary presence of the object must cause the person to experience intense Joy or Excitement;


• The absence of an object or the possible absence of an object in the future should cause a strong non-resource emotion in a person.

In the next article, I will talk about the “Logic of the emotion Joy”
Those. about how he thinks, how he makes decisions, how he sees the world, how a person experiencing the emotion Joy acts.

Eat famous phrase“Always rejoice!” But many newcomers are confused by the fact that in the temple one can rarely see the smiles of believers; their faces are rather stern, or even gloomy. It’s as if the believers decided: since I go to church, I must be very serious. It turns out a strange discrepancy, which greatly confuses neophytes.

We decided to talk about imaginary and real joy and how to achieve it with the priest of the Church of the Kazan Icon Mother of God on Red Square by Igor FOMIN.

Two at the window

I would like to start my answer with an example. Two people look out the window at night and see a traveler on the street. One says: “Surely this is a terrible robber. He robbed, killed, drank, fornicated, and now he can barely drag his feet.” The other replies: “No, no! This wonderful person. He probably worked all day at work and went to church for service in the evening. Then he helped someone else, and now he’s going home.” So let's initially justify people, and not condemn them, agreed?

If you answer the question what is joy, I think it is external manifestation love. When in any circumstances, with any people you can communicate in such a way, look into their eyes in such a way that their souls will become brighter and purer. WITH a joyful person nice to be around.

I remember my first meeting with the famous elder Kirill (Pavlov) from the Trinity-Sergius Lavra. At that time I was still a seminary student and went to Father Kirill because of selfish feelings: everyone is going - and I, too, need to join spirituality. …After long wait It was my turn. Father Kirill invited me to his cell, sat me down on a chair, joked, and gave me an icon. And I was as if out of my mind, watching him in shock. And he left with an extraordinary feeling of joy. This feeling is similar to how you enter a heated room from the cold: you are immediately embraced by warmth. And here is love. I did not expect this then and remembered this first meeting for the rest of my life.

Gold sinks, garbage floats...

I can say about unsmiling believers... You know, gold always sinks, but garbage floats up and catches your eye. If you calm down your irritation with others a little and take a closer look, you will definitely see these hidden little pieces of gold. A sign that a person is the right way in the matter of saving your soul - this is precisely joy and love. The Lord gave a clear definition of who His disciples are: they can be recognized by the fact that they will be in love each other. However, the presence of people with a “minus” sign in the temple does not mean that there is no one with a “plus” sign. If you want to find good things, you will definitely find them.

So that routine does not obscure Christ

You can find out whether your joy is real or not by its fruits. For example, people gathered for a picnic outside the city, grilled kebabs, talked happily, drank, and left after midnight. Everything seems to be fine. And in the morning one has a headache with a hangover, another is counting how many of his dishes were broken and lost, the third has a sore leg: yesterday he went for a swim and injured himself. It's the consequences that matter.

Spiritual joy is completely different. Each of you has probably experienced this. Come to a concert of classical or folk music that has nothing to do with Orthodoxy. For example, the Kuban Choir comes to Moscow every year, I always go to listen to it. And you know, they start singing - and you just cry. This is an indicator that joy is spiritual. And in the morning you wake up with a light heart, your head doesn’t hurt and you don’t regret the evening you spent. The Savior Himself, the apostles, and prophets say that joy is one of the fundamental moments of God’s existence. And it is very important that a believer who is spiritually educated and follows external rules does not lose this joy, does not walk around with a gloomy, pompous face, as some do today, believing that this is an important indicator of their faith.

It also happens. It is easy and joyful for a person to be in church. You go out as if on wings: “I’m ready to embrace the whole world!” You go into the subway and someone steps on your foot. As often happens with us, we stepped on a little, but got back a lot - and off we go: “Oh, you cow, watch where you’re going!” And grace flew away from you, and in its place was emptiness. Then thoughts about earthly things begin: “I’ll come home now. There are so many things that need to be done... Prepare dinner, hit my eldest son in the ear - he probably didn’t do his homework, nail down a shelf...” It was as if the person had never been in the temple. That is, it is very important to be able to preserve this fragile joy.

U English writer and the theologian Clive Lewis has a story “Dissolution of Marriage” that fits our topic. Its plot is briefly as follows. There is a day when a train arrives from hell to heaven, dead sinners can see what they have lost. And then two people meet in heaven. In earthly life they studied together at the university at the theological faculty. One became a bishop - and after death he went to hell. And the other became a theologian and went to heaven. He says to the bishop: “Listen, you need to have time to climb this mountain before dawn. Christ will meet you there - and then you will stay here forever. Let's go faster. I will help you". And the bishop answers: “You see, there, in the underworld, we have a theological circle scheduled for tomorrow. I will need to give a report on the topic of Christ: what He would be like if he lived to be 50 years old. I would love to get up, but I can’t” – “What a circle! Here’s the mountain, drop everything and let’s go!” - “The train is leaving soon, I might be late. And my report...” And he leaves without climbing the mountain. And Christ was very close by. I had to throw off this whole routine and just go towards Him. This pompousness obscures joy from a person, obscures the Lord himself. This does not mean that you need to stop washing dishes, vacuuming - no, there are necessary things - I’m talking about the attitude towards them.

"My joy"

There is another point related to joy. This is a protective remedy against any scandals. If you translate everything, let’s say, into a funny, smiling plane, very often they will simply not contact you - you still won’t get angry.

As we know, Seraphim of Sarov greeted everyone: “Hello, my joy!” This is a unique saint who fled from the world, and the world itself ran to him. It seems to me that the words “my joy,” spoken with love, are what can disarm the rude person in the family. I specifically limit myself family problems, because we read: we must love our neighbor. But how much easier it is to love from a distance! They say that love for one's neighbor is measured in kilometers: the further, the stronger. When the person living next to you snores, swears, drinks... Love him, lying flat on the sofa in a drunken state or lying around front door very difficult. Inviting joy into our lives is like grafting an orchid onto an apple tree. Don’t walk around with this smiling mask, don’t force yourself to hug and kiss everyone and shout: “I love you!” And here the Lord gives us a very clear answer. In the 15th chapter of the Gospel of John there is a direct speech of Christ to us. He compares Himself to a vine, us to branches, and our actions to a bunch of grapes. And there are words there that the Heavenly Father will give us everything we ask, just so that there are fruits - good deeds. The grapevine receives double nutrition: from the earth juices, water and from the air - sunlight. That is, there must be harmony in our communication with the heavenly, spiritual and earthly worlds. And our fruit should be born in such a way that our neighbors can easily live next to us.

It happens that a loved one is happy, as it seems to you, over some nonsense. His favorite football team won. There is no need to spoil his mood: “Well, is your stupid football over? Finally, go get some milk, you goat!” Sorry for the rudeness, outwardly everything may sound much softer, but in our souls we are grumbling and indignant. And the person’s good mood is destroyed. Turn him into peaceful course, rejoice with him, sit next to him. Maybe he will see that you understand him - and will stop drinking or not noticing you; on the contrary, you will become closer in a new way.

And most importantly: joy cannot be taught if a person does not feel it. He must understand this himself. Otherwise, at least all the saints will gather and beg you: “Don’t look at me as the embodiment of the world’s grief. Smile at your mother-in-law, wife, children. So what if your family upsets you? ” – there will be no sense. Just as it is impossible to force a person to be a believer until he comes to this through his own experience. That person may laugh at you. mock. And then he will be left alone and think: “How good he is, he hasn’t done anything bad to me. Afterwards it’s easy on the soul.”

It will certainly help a lot in your search for joy. Holy Bible. There are so many places in it that open up a completely stunning world for a person, a world of spiritual joy. Every morning we get up and look in the mirror, brush our teeth, comb our hair, and preen ourselves. We put on a show to go out to people in decent form. And the Holy Scriptures are the mirror of our soul. You’ll look there and say to yourself: “Oh! How twisted you are, my friend. We need to change something, we need to catch up.” We can't even imagine What The Lord gave it to us. A person can read this small book - the Gospel - throughout his life and each time find something new and live by it.

The Lord gave us wonderful starting capital: mind, heart, soul. We cannot waste it all, like the youngest son from the famous Parable of prodigal son. But you cannot, as the eldest son, demand a reward from your father. The best path is the royal one, in the middle: repentance and humility from youngest son and the hard work of the elder. And you will turn out to be a wonderful, joyful person.

Recorded by Elena Merkulova

The anatomical structure of the skull is different for everyone. This gives rise to a variety of faces. Some we will like, some we won't. This gives subjective feeling that everyone smiles in their own way. This is partly true, but only partly. Regardless of gender, age, race, nationality and physical characteristics, the muscular structure of the face is the same for everyone. This should be taken into account during visual calibration. Those. a sincere smile caused by the tension of the same muscles will be subjectively perceived differently on a person with a narrow skull than on a person with a wide skull. Just like a smile, even within people of the same race and nationality, will look different depending on age and gender. But I will write about this in an article about how to count Neutral person.

And that is why the absence or presence of a clear smile on the face leads to erroneous judgment, that a person is in this moment feels. Those. about the emotion Joy. A smile may or may not accompany the appearance of the emotion Joy. The presence of a smile is not a necessary attribute of emotion. A smile occurs when the intensity of the emotion Joy crosses a certain threshold level. In the meantime, the intensity has not passed this threshold, the facial muscles are relaxed.

What, if not a smile, most accurately indicates the presence of the emotion Joy?

Voice. No matter how unusual it may seem, it is the voice, and not the face, that gives signals that allow one to distinguish one pleasant emotion from another

Face. Yes. The face is only in second place. If we talk about visual signs of the emotion Joy - relaxation of facial muscles and symmetry. I understand that the face does not have geometric symmetry, but visible symmetry is enough for us.

Smiles can be misleading, but not only because they arise with each of the emotions of joy and pleasure, but also because they can appear when people do not experience any pleasure, but smile, for example, only out of politeness. There is one feature that allows you to distinguish the sincerity of a smile of pleasure from other smiles. This is a very subtle feature and most people don't notice it. If you don't know what to look for, you may find yourself misled, confused, and miscalibrated emotion. I will tell you more about this feature in the chapter “Calibrating the Joy Emotion.”

Also, it would be wrong to assume that smiles are not very reliable signals of emotions. This is wrong; if a smile has arisen, then the smile clearly, although barely noticeably, tells us whether it is caused by the pleasure received or not.

Where then to look, and what to look for in signs of a sincere, real smile?
More than a hundred years ago, the great French neurologist Duchenne de Boulogne discovered how a real smile of pleasure differs from all other smiles in that with a real smile of pleasure it is caused by tension in only one facial muscle. It is called the zygomatic major, i.e. the zygomatic major muscle (it runs from the cheekbone downward at an angle to the corner of the lips, pulling it diagonally upward when smiling).

Just for your information. Anatomically, there are more than 18 muscles around the lips that can change the shape of the lips. The combination of the work of these muscles gives the variety of smiles that you can see on faces. Most of these muscles control articulatory apparatus and can take part in the formation of so-called social smiles. Therefore, it is so important to distinguish sincere smile from social.

Calibrating the emotion Joy

Signs of a sincere smile. I have organized the verification of the emotion Joy by signs, according to their significance.

Face in general. The facial muscles are relaxed and the face is symmetrical. Eyes. The muscles around the eyes are relaxed and slightly pulled towards the temple. As a result, the eyes have the shape of an almond. Corners of lips. The corners of the mouth are pulled back and up towards the cheekbones. Lips. The lips are relaxed. The mouth may be slightly open. If the smile is wide. Cheeks. The cheeks are relaxed and raised. Eyelids: The upper eyelid is relaxed. The lower eyelids are raised and relaxed. Wrinkles are visible underneath. Sometimes the skin collects in a “pouch”. Eyes. Wrinkles in the shape of chicken feet go from the outer corners of the eyes to the temples.

Emotion Joy from the point of view of the NLP model

Structure of the emotion Joy

Trigger. The main trigger of Joy is sudden satisfaction of a significant one for humans criteria.
Those. Joy arises when - unexpectedly for a person - some important criterion for him is satisfied. Careful observation of a person will allow you to determine what criterion is truly important for a person. A common mistake for salespeople or consultants is that the latter meet customer problems with a joyful expression on their faces. Agree, this is not what the client would like to see. But about the use of the emotion of Joy in the article about " Logic and Mathematics of Joy"

Operate. It’s only at this stage and not earlier that vocal and facial signs of Joy appear. Not earlier! Joy is a socially significant emotion, indicating - first of all - to you that “Everything is OK”, and carrying an outward meta-message - “Everything is fine” and “I’m going to communicate.”
Time. Joy is the emotion of the moment. Those. the emotion of Joy cannot last long. And this is its beauty. Joy fixes attention on the current moment. Those. fixes time in the present, in the “here and now.” Those. Being in the emotion of Joy, in principle, it is impossible to plan the future and analyze the past. Other emotions are more suitable for this.
Information. The emotion of Joy submodally makes the background significant. Those. the figure becomes indistinguishable against the background. This is partly due to the fact that the muscles around the eyes relax and, as a result, vision becomes unfocused. The world becomes generalized, and in particular, the details on it become blurry, but colorful. Being in the emotion of Joy, it is very difficult to operate with details. But it becomes easy to operate with generalizations.
Order and organization. There is no order or procedure. Lots of possibilities. This emotion is for creativity, for communication, for communication. Only creative ones can solve problems while in the emotion of Joy, and then the solution will be creative. Any organization and consistency will kill Joy at once.

Test. Similarity. The similarity and presence of built-in high LUs. Perhaps more about this in the next edition.

Exit. The stereotype of behavior of a person in the emotion of Joy is relaxation and communication. Emotions serve to program certain behavior patterns. Emotions can be said to narrow down the available behavioral choices to just one. We can say that emotions dictate the logic of thinking and the logic of behavior. Logic of behavior dictated by the emotion Joy - relax and, if possible, actively communicate.

Social (learned) emotion Joy

Often in business negotiations it is necessary to distinguish and see the nuances in the display of this emotion, even if it is falsified and insincere, it still carries shades of sincere emotions, commenting on how this facial expression should be read.

At the moment of falsification of emotions, the face displays several signals simultaneously. That emotion that a person wants to show, and his own, sincere emotions that he feels At the moment. At the moment of falsification of an emotion, the brain checks the truth of this emotion, for a short time, it temporarily goes into a trance state and the person experiencing natural emotion, is practically not aware of it, but the brain, after checking, adds its own comment. therefore, at the moment falsification(construction) of emotions, by man facial pattern is consciously formed, which he thinks is characteristic of this emotion with small additions. After all, no one taught him how to display emotions correctly. More precisely, he was taught by the society in which he was brought up.

In the next article, I will tell you:

• How the emotion Joy is learned;


• What other emotions does Joy enter into alliances with and what comes out of it;