How to develop your own self. Comfort zone

You will receive an answer to your question where to start self-development after reading this article. Here I will share with you a technique that will keep you busy just 40 minutes a day. These classes will be your answer to the question of how to start self-development right now! No lifestyle changes this moment You won’t be required to, just 40 minutes of practice daily! Almost immediately you will feel relaxation, improved well-being, and it will not require lengthy preparation from you. But more on that later, first let me start with a preface.

By typing this article, I feel a huge responsibility. Because I am well aware of what a delicate, careful attitude a person requires towards himself at the moment of searching for the starting point from which self-development begins.

How and when to start self-development? How it should NOT be started.

That is why I will try to give the most clear and most appropriate answer to the main question of this article. But not every answer can be successful, no matter how accurately it reflects the main stages of self-development, there is always a danger that this answer can scare you away, make you give up precisely at the moment that may turn out to be the most crucial, important point in your life, when it is determined whether you will follow the path of self-improvement or continue to live old life. I'll explain this a little below.

Many information sources trying to answer the question " how to start self-development?“, dump a bunch of advice on the reader. These tips cannot be called harmful or incorrect. They are simply untimely. Since they propose to begin making fundamental changes in lifestyle, habits, daily routine, social relationships, etc., in general, radically revise the existing, familiar state of affairs.

Such advice, calling for drastic, rapid changes, requires colossal willpower and energy in the person to whom they are addressed. After all, not everyone is able to immediately part with their favorite habits and begin to organize free and work time, stop aimless, unproductive wandering on the Internet and take up reading books or other sources that promote personal self-development along with general erudition.

People get used to their way of life, for this reason they are not able to magic wand, rebuild it and start changing for the better. Moreover, such a radical transition to new habits, as well as routines, requires such things as willpower, character, determination, focus on the goal, the ability to make decisions, and bear responsibility for them. But these things are components of personality development, they develop as you go through the stages of self-development.

And if someone asks " where to start self-development”, then the conclusion is drawn that this “someone” is still only at the origins of this path and, therefore, may not possess some of the above-mentioned qualities.

It turns out that in the service of a good goal there was a wrong approach. My task is harmonious self-improvement, which I understand as the balanced development of intellectual, physical, aesthetic, social and spiritual qualities. We are not going to rush anywhere just yet. After all, I do not offer any quick solutions, but am aimed at the progressive gradual formation of you as an individual.

How to start self-development today

Therefore, I am not going to expect any rapid changes from you, but I will suggest starting small. From such a “small” thing, which will not be a challenge to your usual way of life, will not take up a lot of your time and effort (you will only need 40 minutes of time a day). But later, with regular practice, it will bring a lot of life benefits. And only then, gradually, when the time comes, you will begin to make changes in your life, in your character, in your environment.

You will have time to decide what you really want, what qualities to develop, what to focus on and where to move, but this still requires some help, a springboard. You can start by forming this “springboard” right today, without postponing it for the future, because it does not require special training or special skills.

Let me emphasize once again that the application of this eastern practice was successfully reflected in Western culture, having proven its effectiveness in training exercises relaxation, control of consciousness and neutralization of states of mental discomfort, maintaining discipline, moving from the field of esoteric knowledge to the field of scientific knowledge. Meditation is an effective tool for self-development!

But there must be a clear understanding that this practice is not an end in itself, just as for a runner it is not ultimate goal development of leg muscles is simply a tool for achieving the desired result: for a runner it is victory in running competitions, and for you it is harmonious and balanced self-development. You meditate not in order to ideally master the technique of meditation (although mastering it would be quite good, even necessary), but in order to make it easier to grow and develop as a person.

Personal growth is probably possible without meditation, but since I rely on own experience, I'm talking about what helped me. I don't know any other ways. For me, meditation served as an impetus for moving forward and the beginning of self-development. Finally, after a long prelude, there was a specific and clear answer to the question of how to start self-development: “start meditating!”

Firstly, as I already wrote, this will not take more than 40 minutes a day, it does not require any special conditions (you don’t have to give up everything to collect your belongings and leave for Tibet :-)). You can even do it in public transport on the way to work/school. Although it is advisable to still do this in calm atmosphere. But if this is not possible, then even the metro will do).

Is meditation difficult?

You don't need to have a lot of training to start meditating! You will master the technique with practice, it will come with time. Also, you don't have to change your habits right away, just add meditation in the morning and evening to your daily routine. The main condition is to do this regularly, don't forget and don't forget, only then will you feel the beneficial effect.

The effect manifests itself differently for everyone. I have it in six months. Don't let this deadline scare you: There will be no immediate results!. You must firmly understand this and come to terms with this thought. In my opinion instant result it's a myth, a phantom. All important, fundamental changes in personality are long and gradual character) So where to start?

Meditation is your practice, which will provide you with the necessary skills for self-development; it is a kind of fundamental exercise that you need to start doing first of all. This is also necessary, just as a beginning gymnast should start by stretching before moving on to everything else.

First, familiarize yourself with the theory in, and then you can begin the practice itself. Remember, no one is rushing you, you don’t need to have time to read it all as soon as possible. If you are too lazy to study all these theoretical materials, then start practicing right away, but at least read the conclusions outlined in the first step.

In conclusion, I would like to note that although the main long-term effect of meditation does not appear immediately, you will feel some positive changes almost immediately after starting practice. This is because you will simply be regularly relax and put your thoughts in order(this refers to instant effects), which is already good. In addition, you introduce a mandatory exercise into your routine, which you will do daily, strictly twice a day for 20 minutes per session, this already contributes some minimal additional order into your life (no matter what you do every day, it doesn’t matter whether it’s meditation, exercise or daily jogging). This teaches you to keep your promises to yourself, to maintain discipline, which is perhaps one of the most significant stages of self-development.

I hope you are ready to get started. Wish you luck!

“Whoever lacks sex talks about sex, a hungry man talks about food, a man who doesn’t have money talks about money, and our oligarchs and bankers talk about morality.” (Sigmund Freud)

And people whose lies to themselves and others lead them to regression and personal degradation talk about “self-development” and “personal growth.” It’s bad when they lie only to themselves, ten times worse when they force other people to accept their lies as the truth.

There is no generally accepted and generally accepted concept of self-development (and even personal growth), but there is a universal and adequate Hegelian principle of development, based on which it is possible to formulate what will be personal development for a person and what will not.

So, according to the fundamental principle of dialectics, development is a process of continuous resolution of contradictions between opposites, during which the latter constantly change qualitatively and become more complex.

What is the opposite for a person?

Another man? I am begging you.

Nature? Long gone.

Two eternal rivals

The opposite for the individual, for the “I” is one – this is “WE” or society, society. The contradiction is that society seeks to deprive the individual of freedom in order to make him an obedient, predictable and controllable “cog” in the social system. While the individual, on the contrary, strives to realize his deepest needs and develop his potential, which is impossible without freedom.

The most interesting thing is that in this confrontation, in this struggle of opposites, no one can finally win.

The victory of society is totalitarianism (remarkably shown in Zamyatin’s dystopia “WE”), which means stagnation with subsequent degradation and annihilation.

The victory of the individual means the collapse of society, chaos, the death of civilization, and then the death of the individual himself.

In other words, by definition, there can be no winner in this endless battle. But the parties cannot disperse to different corners of the ring, since the forces driving this struggle are too deep and powerful.


Society strives to make the individual manageable through restrictions, prohibitions, and regulations (which are neither bad nor good, but simply contribute to the survival of society and reduce the degree of conflicts within it).

The individual, being born initially free, does not want to live according to the instructions imposed on him, but wants to do (or not do) only what he himself wants. If you observe the behavior of one-year-old, two-year-old and even 3-year-old children, then this is exactly the picture we will see.

Unfortunately, the freedom of natural child behavior is first broken by psychologically dysfunctional parents, then by the same kindergarten teachers, then by school, environment and others. social institutions. As a result, the person becomes obedient and standard. A socially acceptable member of society.

But, since not all people break under the pressure of socialization (some were lucky with their parents, others with external circumstances), then in addition to obedient people, society also receives successful people who are more internally free, and therefore an order of magnitude more competitive. Of these people in different times the result was discoverers, pirates, travelers, conquerors, philosophers, heretics, insurgents, dissidents, divergents, inventors, revolutionaries, entrepreneurs, poets, scientists destroying traditional scientific paradigms, rebel singers, nonconformist writers, charismatic actors and other “youth idols” and “disturbers of public order.”

Living differently turned out to be risky, dangerous, but profitable.

The Secret of Spiral Dynamics

Looking through the prism of Hegel’s “unity and struggle of opposites” at the relationship between society and the individual, Maslow’s student Dr. Claire Graves noticed that they develop in a spiral, moving from level to level due to changing conditions of existence (his followers called this model).

And if at some moments society wins (tribal level, hierarchical level, communitarian level), then, sooner or later, with great or little blood Individualists assert their line (dominance, competition, freedom and systematicity).

Actually, human development proceeds along this spiral, only it takes not centuries and millennia, but years and decades. Instinctively, a person strives to satisfy his needs, the most important of which are the need to be himself (the need for inner freedom) and the need for self-realization (affirmation of one’s idea in the world, deployment of one’s potential). Usually these needs are not realized, which ultimately causes a person a lot of problems and inconveniences due to frankly erroneous steps and actions.

It is the satisfaction of these needs that constitutes the essence and soul of self-development, since self-development is the process of an individual revealing his potential. But it is precisely in this direction that the vast majority of “developing” countries have zero levels.

Why is this happening?

Let's try to figure it out.

In search of adventure: the beginning of self-development

First of all, you need to understand that self-development is not a comfortable sitting with a fat ass on a soft sofa. Not at all. Self-development is the rejection of a safe, familiar-comfortable, stable-familiar state for the sake of a new, not yet mastered, unknown, full of dangers and opportunities, risks and resources.

And this is precisely the rejection of what our personality consists of - habits, stereotypes, inadequate (distorted and clouded) perception of ourselves and reality, a craving for minimizing mental and physical effort, a pathological tendency to maintain stability current state. All this is our given, our “comfort zone”.

It follows that any attempt to get out of this state, from this “comfort zone”, to change oneself threatens to violate the integrity and structure of our personality, the loss of “ground under our feet”, i.e. stability and habitual patterns of response and decision making. And, therefore, it must be blocked. This is what our egoistic mind does together with the “planted” and nurtured in the process of socialization by the Supervisor from society (the sum of unconscious prohibitions and regulations).

This is done using the most effective tool psychological self-defense– with the help of arrogant, frank and shameless lies to oneself (as Freud wrote, everything we say, we say with the aim of hiding the truth from ourselves). Since recognition and acceptance of reality as it is, an honest look at objective facts makes it impossible to remain comfortably in the familiar and familiar state of stable personal decay (i.e., the “comfort zone”) and is a threat to the current version of the personality. Therefore, any system is the first enemy of any changes to itself.

And since lying to oneself is a ubiquitous phenomenon, instead of real, uncomfortable and unpleasant self-development, which truly changes a personality and raises its level, we have its “vanilla” imitation, which is supported by a whole galaxy of assorted “trainers” and “gurus.” And not because these “trainers” and “gurus” are particularly bad people and participate in a conspiracy, simply demand creates supply. And if drowned in own lies the sucker believes that two jumps, three claps, songs, dances and other crap contribute to his “personal growth”, then the sucker will be happy to sell the corresponding product.


Plan« self-development« in Lokhov's way

What do suckers on the Internet usually mean by self-development (personal growth)?

♦ reading books (and 99% of this is pop consumer literature or clinical schizoterism)

♦ reading public pages on social networks

♦ meditation (usually effortless)

♦ affirmations

♦ reading turbo gopher protocols (or something similar)

♦ memorization motivational quotes

♦ attending free webinars and master classes

♦ occasionally haphazardly performing stupid exercises

♦ attempts to follow inadequate current situation general recommendations and other people’s “formulas for success” (such as “believe in yourself”, “go and do it!”, “learn to make money”, “ask the universe!”)

♦ and other nonsense of the same kind

The main reason for the popularity of this kind of imitations lies in human nature itself, which at the spiritual level is ground by the millstones of the universal game called “Sacrifice” (called Samsara in Buddhism). And the general typological sign of any victim is low level responsibility and constantly throwing off all remnants of this very responsibility.

And since the above imitations of responsibility and serious work do not require, for the “victim” these are the most delicious dishes.

Another reason is the dominant idea of ​​consumerism prevailing in society, due to which the sucker perceives everything that is in the world as an object of consumption. From these positions, trainings are also perceived not as a form of training where you need to work seriously, but as a product similar to a car service “I paid money, make me better and more tuned.” Of course, this won't work. Loading a helicopter control program like in The Matrix has not yet been invented. That’s why the sucker doesn’t go to serious training. Only for “trainings for suckers”, after which for some time he feels “invigorated” and “enlightened”, and then again continues to live as he lived.


More advanced people, consciously or subtly understanding that refusing responsibility is a direct path to failure, tend to choose more effective forms of working on themselves:

♦ charging, physical exercise and sports, hardening, work with lifestyle;

♦ working through emotional symptoms of problems

♦ visiting a psychologist/psychotherapist

♦ participation in trainings, courses, seminars

♦ observation of your thoughts, reflection, introspection;

♦ development of certain professional skills and abilities (competencies)

♦ receiving practical knowledge and their application in reality

As a rule, the general disadvantage of such work is the complete or partial absence of any intelligible system that allows transformation to be carried out on the deepest layers of the unconscious, purposefully and as efficiently as possible.

Two ways to stop lying to yourself

Usually it is very difficult, and almost impossible, for a person to understand that he is lying to himself and where exactly he is lying to himself, which radically reduces the effectiveness of any work on himself to zero. Is there a way out of this? Yes, two!

First- a time-tested, simple as a felt boot and reliable as a watch, a way of using a “mirror”, that is, another person. Such a person (“leader”) must professionally be able to give feedback, take an adult position and possess the necessary procedural and technological arsenal to encourage the slave to “look terrible truth in the eyes". The latter, naturally, must be mentally prepared for this and understand that self-development is not a pleasant walk, but hard and unpleasant work to create a new version of oneself.

Second method or approach, which requires even more effort and even greater willingness to tell oneself the truth, is based on the fact that any lie to oneself leads to neuroses. And all neuroses are localized in the body in the form of clamps. A targeted impact on the tension, for example, with the help of Reichian massage, makes it possible to identify and utilize the neurotic complex and the lies it generates.

You can try to do without massage and work through neuroses with other techniques and practices, but there is a high risk that, since the work will be carried out at the mental level, the egoistic mind, implementing the function of self-defense, will again replace real job imitation and endless walking in circles “chasing your own tail” will begin.


How the process of self-development starts

And, of course, there must be a system in self-development. And this system should work for the most effective implementation of the goal correctly set by a person. This goal has clear and understandable criteria

♦ it is the direct implementation of a person’s life mission (destination)

♦ it is strategic, that is, it is not set for a year, not two, or even 10 years

♦ this goal is aimed only and not so much at changing a person’s situation, but at changing the world (even in a very small aspect)

♦ this goal is Worthy, that is, aimed at the development of life, and the negative results associated with the goal, if they are inevitable, are local

♦ I sincerely want to go towards this goal

The very fact of setting and regularly focusing on such a Goal will launch the process of real, not “cool” self-development. The cutting off and throwing away of everything superfluous and unnecessary will begin. Hidden potential will begin to be released, talents, abilities and personality traits will begin to reveal themselves. Important personal resources such as time, strength, energy, health will not be wasted, but will be invested in activities to move towards the Goal.


The process of achieving a goal will require the necessary skills and abilities that are adequate to the reality of knowledge and a more advanced system of thinking, which means a person willy-nilly will have to work on their development.

There will be a need for other people, not “empty” friends and girlfriends, but comrades-in-arms, like-minded people, comrades with whom it will be much more comfortable, pleasant and interesting, but again you will have to learn to build mutually beneficial and harmonious relationships, which will require higher maturity, as well as the ability to communicate, negotiate, and take into account the interests and feelings of another.

All this will require daily, hourly and minute-by-minute changes from a person, since any stopping and marking time will destroy results achieved and throw it back. Yes, it will be a difficult life, active, intense, requiring constant “moving of the brain,” but at the same time it will be interesting, bright, truly fulfilling and harmonious. This is the notorious “life in the flow.”

After all, development has only one alternative - degradation. No middle ground or third options. Either you move up, change yourself for the sake of the goal high goal, or you live a relatively comfortable, stable and dull life, losing yourself, your resources and opportunities. But at the same time, you sincerely convince yourself and others that you are developing somewhere in something. Truly, there is nothing more sophisticated than the lies of a limited egoistic mind.

Self-development system

The path of self-development will be different for everyone, there is, of course, universal principles, techniques, technologies, practices, techniques, but they are all just tools, and the person determines the specific content of work on himself. It’s like building a house: you can move into one that is already ready, but uncomfortable and uncomfortable, or you can plan and build a house exclusively for yourself, to suit your needs and needs. It is clear that living in your own home will be much more comfortable and pleasant.

The problem of modern times is an overabundance of information. If a hundred years ago a person could afford to calmly, slowly sit with a serious book and carefully study it, analyze it, compare facts and draw conclusions, now everything is different. There is too much information garbage, “white noise”, copy-paste, outright lies, fantasies and bullshit that is presented as truth. In this entire mega-ocean of information modern man without systems thinking, who does not know the techniques of effective and instant filtering of information literally drowns, he simply does not have enough time to think and understand. As a result, a truly valuable and necessary information he simply doesn’t learn it, which is why he dooms himself to constant mistakes, gross miscalculations and outright fuck-ups.

The only way out of this situation is to follow the advice of the coolest political strategist of the early twentieth century, who said that “It is impossible to solve specific issues without solving general ones; you will always run into specific ones”(i.e. screw up regularly). This means that in addition to setting a goal, you need to “overload” your thinking by uninstalling the “firmware” that is inadequate to reality and master basic principles, helping to filter out information junk and make strategically correct decisions.

This is exactly what you need to do, first of all, if you want to really, and not “coolly,” succeed in self-development.

Would you like to receive a free analysis of your situation and professional recommendations to create your own self-development system? Then just

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Blog of private investor Ganesa

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Nikolay Berdyaev

It is generally accepted that every person is an individual, regardless of what qualities and character traits he or she possesses. It’s hard to disagree with this, but we can and should add to this that a person, in order to remain a person, must necessarily develop. After all, we call a person, first of all, a unique, special, interesting person, unlike other people, who has rare abilities and a rich inner world. But without development, without working on oneself, a person will not go far from other people, he will be the same as everyone else. And if a person does not differ from other people, if he does not have special qualities inherent only to him, then we can call him a person with a very big stretch. However, the question arises: why does each of us need to be different from other people, why become an individual, for what purpose, for what benefit? This is what I will tell you, dear readers, in this article. I will tell you about how to develop your personality and why it should be developed. Believe me, there are great benefits from such development.

Why develop your personality?

To understand why a person needs to develop a personality, it is enough to take a closer look at what is happening in our lives. What is highly valued in this world? It is obvious that it values ​​everything that, firstly, you and I need, and secondly, everything that is in short supply. What is in short supply is valuable. Do you agree? Moreover, what’s interesting is that sometimes we don’t really need what is in short supply, but we are still drawn to it. We love everything rare and exceptional because we ourselves want to be like that. But we don’t particularly value what we have in abundance, even if it is something very useful for us, and sometimes we don’t value it at all. An interesting trait of human personality, isn't it? Someday I will explain to you why we behave this way. For now, let's return to the essence of our question. So, how can you become a valuable, and at the same time, a sought-after person, so that other people need you, so that they pay attention to you and love you? To do this, you need to become special, not like everyone else. You need to become more interesting, more useful, of better quality, and even, let’s say, more unusual than other people. This can be achieved in different ways, you can work on your wrapper, that is, on your appearance, or you can set yourself a more complex and serious task - to change, or rather, develop your inner content. This is not an easy job, to be honest. But it needs to be done so that you are valued, so that you are needed, so that you are difficult to replace, and so on. Don't forget - what is rare is valuable. And what is valuable is loved and protected.

People will begin to pay more attention to you, and you will enjoy greater respect if you can develop rare and useful qualities for people, if you become an interesting, bright and even a little mysterious person. Good prospect? That's the point, it's good. After all, we all want to be valued, loved, respected, to be given attention, to be admired, to be needed, and so on and so forth. It's nice and useful. But let's think about what we should be valued, loved, respected for? Why should other people give us their precious attention, for what benefits? What's so special about us? What personal qualities of ours can people around us admire? This, friends, is something each of us should think carefully about on our own. Many of us may have a very good opinion of ourselves and think that there are no others like them. And this is good - you need to have a high opinion of yourself, without any doubt. This increases our self-esteem. But believe me, other people may think differently. They may see us as a completely different person, not the same as we see. How important this is for us is another question. We live in a society that, whether we like it or not, must accept us, or rather, we must be able to become part of it, because we depend on this society. We all depend on each other. And the point here is what place each of us will take in society. So, for this place to be as good as possible, a person needs to become an individual not only for himself, but also for other people. Let's now find out what we need to do with ourselves in order to develop our personality.

How to develop your personality

So, if you agree with all of the above, then I believe you are interested in learning about how you can develop your personality. Friends, if I tell you that personal development is a simple matter, I will be lying. And I don't want to lie. And I will not. So, no, it’s not easy. And I think that not unfortunately, but fortunately, this is not easy to do. After all, if the development of a person’s personality were simple matter, such a thing as working on yourself would simply not exist. Work is not the most pleasant word, you will agree. We associate it with tension, with workload, with stress, sometimes with pain, and not with pleasure and joy, unless you love your job, like me, for example. Be that as it may, any job has its own pleasure, there is its own joy, and those of you who do what you love know this very well. Working on ourselves is a special pleasure that we experience when we understand how our efforts bring us benefit. Therefore, working on yourself to develop your personality is pleasant, interesting, and fun. You can get a thrill from this. Therefore, it’s not so scary that this is not an easy job, the main thing is to understand how interesting and useful it is.

What should be done? Study, gain new skills, play sports, as well as interesting and creative activity, make your life and the lives of other people better. Here's what you need to do to develop your personality. It is your work on your body and mind that makes you a more perfect person, and of course, different from others. Main question It's not about what to do, but how to do it. And it’s written about how to do this - how to work on yourself, how to develop yourself great amount books and articles. And each of these books and articles offers its own recipe for personal development, although many of them are similar to each other. The more accurate and effective this recipe is, the faster you will be able to develop in yourself a personality whose analogue will be impossible to find. And the quality of your personality can and certainly must be such that society as a whole or individual people value you very highly. To do this, you must be useful to people, society, interesting and unique. What is rare is valuable, remember, right?

I will give you my recipe for how you can develop your personality, so that you keep it in mind when deciding exactly how you should work on yourself. Who knows, maybe he is the best of all existing ones. Why not, I have been dealing with this issue, essentially, my entire adult life. I believe, friends, that you need to start with psychology. Yes, yes, I understand, this is not the first time I’ve talked about this, or rather, written about it. And you, in turn, can say that again this sandpiper praises his swamp, as if nothing else exists in the world except this psychology. Of course, there is, but, friends, I praise what I praise, namely, such a science as psychology, not because I study it, but because it really gives us a lot - it allows us to develop valuable values ​​in ourselves. qualities for ourselves and for other people, thanks to what points us to them. That’s why I started studying it myself, because I saw how valuable it is for a person, both from the point of view of knowing himself and from the point of view of knowing other people. You can't improve yourself without understanding exactly how you're made, right? How will you know about this? Well, okay, there is biology, anatomy, medicine, anthropology and a host of other human sciences that study his body and mind. There are many of them, these sciences. But if we narrow our view of this issue, we can reduce everything to those sciences that study the human body and those that study his soul and mind. And these are the things we need to develop in order to make ourselves better. Here, psychology mainly studies the human soul and mind. And this, as you can, is not even so much to know as to feel - very important elements of a human being. And since they are important, we need to work on them in order to develop our personality - that’s exactly what we need, right?

Therefore, when I say that you need to study in order to develop your personality, you must understand what exactly you need to learn first. If you want to improve, well, say, some technical device or come up with a new one, you can start studying physics, mathematics, engineering, and so on. If you have a goal - to come up with, say, a new medicine for humanity, you should start studying chemistry and biology, and other sciences related to medicine. Well, if you want to understand yourself and other people and want to develop in yourself the best, the strongest, the most valuable qualities, then what, if not psychology, can I offer you for study. The question here is: what kind of person do you want to become, what do you want to be valued and respected for, for what knowledge and skills? To understand this, take a closer look at our life and answer the question - which people in it are the most popular, who are loved, appreciated and respected most, and for what? And then think about how you can become one of these people - what do you need to study for this? Maybe you don't want to follow my path, okay, I don't insist. Then choose your path - find, invent, choose your calling, as it suits you. After all, you still need to study in order to become a valuable person, and for this you need to study well, very well. And to study well, you need to have a great desire to achieve something. What do you want to succeed in, what do you want to achieve? Don’t rush to answer this question, think about it – this is a difficult choice.

In general, the more you can do that you can’t do, or can do but other people do much worse than you, the better. After all, being a person does not mean, for example, having your own opinion, as many of us are told today, since it may well turn out to be incorrect and even absurd. Why then have it, if you can borrow someone else’s, more correct, more accurate and much more useful opinion for us? To be a person means to be useful person, useful both for yourself and for others. Even if you are different from other people and have charisma, you will not necessarily be a person to other people. After all, not every personality is valuable, even if it is unique. A person can be quite unusual, unique, interesting, but at the same time harmful. We can accept such a person, and even partly admire him as a person, but at the same time, if he causes us harm rather than benefit, then we will inevitably wish that this person was not in our life. Therefore, I believe that you need to work on yourself in such a way that you ultimately become a very useful person for society and be in demand by it. This will significantly simplify and improve our lives. Therefore, you should approach your development from the perspective of your own interests and the interests of the society in which we live.

Let's now talk about our shortcomings - after all, we all have them. We need to eliminate our shortcomings, if possible, and, if necessary, skillfully hide them. You see, a person with a bunch of shortcomings does not seem unique. Whereas the image of an ideal person, whom you can admire, whom you can and should look up to, whom you can love and appreciate, lives in the head of each of us. We want to see someone as an ideal person, someone other than ourselves. Is the ideal unattainable? Maybe. But you need to strive for it in order to at least seem like an ideal person, and therefore rare, and therefore valuable, and therefore someone who needs to be loved, valued, respected, and protected. An ideal person- this is without a doubt a personality, even if he is ideal in the heads of only a few people, or even in the head of one single person, but very valuable to him. Therefore, our shortcomings are, to some extent, our enemies, with whom we must constantly fight, increasing our cultural and intellectual level. Let other people behave naturally, the way they want. And you behave as you should in order to make a positive impression on people, and at the same time on yourself. You will begin to respect yourself more, and people will respect you more, if your behavior is consistent with the most high requirements. Therefore, be sure to develop self-discipline, because for personal development this is necessary work. It is not circumstances, not other people, who must control your behavior so that it is acceptable - you have to do it. Personality is not an object, but a subject. Therefore, the individual himself determines the norms of his behavior, based on the characteristics of the society in which this individual lives.

And finally, the last thing you need to develop right attitude To develop your personality means responsibility and independence. A lot has been said and written about this, so much that it’s somehow even inconvenient for me to repeat it. But, either it’s said wrong, or it’s written wrong, or people simply don’t listen to what’s said and written, but for some reason independent and responsible people no longer exists in our society. Therefore, it would be a shame not to discuss this issue again. I am sure that my work will also make its contribution to the development of individual people and society as a whole. What else can be said about responsibility and independence? But we can say this: it is absolutely obvious, at least for me, that the personality itself determines its life path, because she is an individual, not a statistical unit or something that can be generalized. Therefore, a person who wants to become an individual must be free in his soul, in his head and in general within himself in order to do what a free person can do - choose. When you have a choice, and you always have it, you just can’t always see it and don’t always want to see it, you can consider yourself a free man, but on the condition that you make your own choice and take full responsibility for it. So true freedom is within us, and this is the only freedom that no one will ever take away from us without our consent. But in order to have it, or rather, to use it, you need to take responsibility for your life yourself. There is nothing complicated about this, just as there is nothing terrible, but you need to tune in to such an attitude towards life, having understood all the benefits that you can get from such a life. And believe me, there are a lot of benefits from being a responsible and independent person. And the most important of these advantages is the freedom of choice I have already mentioned. You will always have the opportunity to get out of any absolutely dead end in which you may, by the will of fate or because of own decisions turn out to be because you will have a choice - a choice of how to act. People who are not free in their souls do not have such a choice, because other people decide everything for them. And you will have it if you do not refuse to take responsibility for yourself and your life. In life you will have everything - successes, failures, joy, suffering, victories, defeats, and much more that will make you happy and upset. You need to accept all this as a result of your choices, your decisions, your activities. Even if this is not the case, even if we depend to a large extent on circumstances and other people - we, you, friends, do not need to refer to this. Do not convince yourself that someone else in your life plays a more important role than yourself, because this is weakness, this is dependence, this is lack of freedom that kills your personality.

Take responsibility for everything that happens in your life and for yourself first of all. Don’t do this for other people; you can put on any performances for them, but for yourself. Be responsible and independent for yourself in order to be free, because only a person who is free at heart can become a person capable of doing what most other people, who shift responsibility for their lives to everything and everyone, are not capable of. If you shift responsibility to others, you will give them power over you, which means you will lose freedom, and therefore you will not become an individual. And I believe that you deserve to become one! You are already a person, since you have read this article to the end, since you have made the necessary efforts to start moving in the right direction. Therefore, I can only wish you one thing - do not stray from your chosen path, continue moving, develop your personality - this is work for life, but, believe me, it is very generously rewarded. Determine for yourself the purpose for which you should do this work and let it inspire you.

  • What is self-development
    • Willpower
    • Motivation
    • Memory
    • Time planning
    • Discipline
    • Psychology
    • Self-esteem
    • Self confidence
  • Relationship
    • "Secret"
    • "Pay someone else"
    • Lao Tzu "Tao Te Ching"
  • What is self-development

    A person’s personality is an unstable quantity. Over the course of life, it undergoes many changes depending on what tests we withstand and what tasks we set for ourselves. And even living in the same rhythm and adhering to a stable schedule, we change. Often - not in better side, since lack of development almost always leads to degradation.

    Many people experience an identity crisis at the age of 30-35. At these moments we understand that simply living and working is not enough. That we want something deeper and more global from ourselves, that minimums do not suit us, and that not everything can be measured with money and other tangible measures.

    Some people come to this earlier, some later, and some don’t come at all. For some people, the trigger is shock; for others, insight occurs naturally and gradually. As a result, there is a desire to take the path of self-development, stop making demands on the world and start working on yourself, engaging in self-development.

    What is self-development? This is a constant and comprehensive process of working on oneself, developing one’s positive qualities in different areas - physical, intellectual, creative, emotional, spiritual. Self-development is characterized by voluntariness and self-control, when a person learns new information and applies it in practice without any external coercion.

    Why is it important to engage in self-development?

    Really, why all this torment? Studying new information, tiring sports, constant pressure... After all, you can calmly relax on the couch, watch TV series and enjoy “doing nothing.” But idleness is imaginary happiness, the other side of which is fraught with depression and disappointment in life.

    Man is designed this way: he needs constant growth, searching for something new. Stopping moving (not only in the physical, but also in the mental sense), he begins to degrade. Swimming can be used as an example - in order to stay on the water, we must make an effort. Having relaxed and lost control, the swimmer immediately goes to the bottom.

    Look around and compare happy and unhappy acquaintances. What is the difference? Happy people open a new business, attend training courses, play sports, travel constantly, and learn something new. Unhappy people work at the same job for decades, have fun only with the help of beer and are constantly looking for someone to blame for their failures.

    The answer to our question is simple - you need to engage in self-development in order to become happy. Anyone who has set foot on this path understands that both the process itself and the results bring pleasure. And that this resource is inexhaustible, because the upper level of perfection simply does not exist.


    Where to start self-development and self-improvement

    The very, very first step that precedes any action is thought. Desire, idea - call it what you want. They are individual and formulated differently for everyone. From the vague “I don’t want to live like this anymore” to “I plan to learn five languages ​​and earn at least one hundred thousand a month.”

    The first thing you need to do is want it. Moreover, you need to want it long, persistently and continuously. At first, you won’t understand how to even get down to business, doubt your abilities, wander in the dark due to a lack of guidelines...

    Then the answers will start coming. They appear in a book that someone gave, in an unusual person, in new opportunities (for example, going on a multi-day camping trip).

    At this moment, you need to accept all constructive suggestions and all unexpected challenges. But you yourself need to constantly look for these answers, strive for them, and not sit idly by. Read articles on the Internet, watch videos on self-development, look for books, try some of the recommendations in practice. From all this, a methodology will begin to emerge, the first results will appear, and you will see your path.

    This may take a lot of time - it all depends on the person himself and his starting position. For some, a month will be enough, while others will be searching for a year or two. The main thing is not to give up and remember that the search will definitely be crowned with success.


    8 reasons why people don't develop

    It would seem that everything is simple - you take it and develop. You bought a book and read it. Or go to the gym, pick up a barbell, and lift yourself whatever you want. But no! If everything were simple, there would be a lot more people involved in self-development.

    There are many factors, the absence of which prevents us from improving.

    Willpower

    Psychologists have long argued about what willpower is, why some people have it and others don’t, and what to do about it. We conducted a ton of experiments and research and came to the conclusion: willpower is a personal quality that can be developed like a muscle. And its presence is mainly determined by upbringing and habits established in childhood. Lucky were those who had disciplined and strong-willed parents who developed these qualities in their children. If this is not the case in the family, well, the path will be long, but everyone is capable of going through it.

    What is important in defining willpower as a concept is this: thanks to this personality quality, we can follow our decisions and do everything necessary to achieve our goals without succumbing to laziness, reluctance or procrastination.

    How to develop willpower? There are two main methods: doing and not doing. Doing is performing unpleasant or boring, but useful actions, for example, exercising in the morning. Non-doing is a conscious refusal to take action. harmful. For example, from smoking or overeating.

    By the way, church fasting is precisely a practice aimed at training willpower: through refusing certain foods, we learn to control ourselves. If you dig even deeper, you will find that all religions have similar practices of renunciation - food, comfort, property, certain thoughts or actions. This is because the technique of not doing strengthens willpower much more strongly.

    Strength of will - spiritual quality the highest grade, one of the most important for humans. By developing it, you can radically change your life. Have you heard the phrase: “I know what’s right, but for some reason I do the opposite”? This is what people with undeveloped willpower say.

    Motivation

    Motivation is a powerful force. When a person wants something very badly, he is ready to move mountains. Did something go wrong? That means they didn’t want it well. After all, when you really want a cake, are you ready to walk three kilometers to a late-night supermarket to get it?

    So it turns out that you need to teach yourself to want correctly? Exactly! Our cunning brain is aimed at saving energy, as Mother Evolution ordered. And he will come up with excuses to dissuade his owner from unnecessary work: “Well, why is this necessary? We're already doing well! Oh look, there's a new message in the messenger! Look, look, there are kittens in the picture!”

    Therefore, you need to use cunning against the attitudes of your own subconscious, which is lazy and only wants to have fun.

    How to motivate yourself to work? First of all, you need to set the right goals, because even the most best motivation will not act when you do not understand what you want or set false goals imposed by society. For example, money or status. By listening to yourself, you may suddenly discover that what you really want to do is hitchhike or volunteer in Africa, and not spin around like a squirrel in a wheel to satisfy other people's needs.

    So, having set the right goal, we concretize and visualize it. Business - what? What will you do, target audience, idea, team, slogan, theme colors? What kind of house? How many floors, is there a garage, basement, sauna, how many rooms?

    For example, you want to start your own business, but have never done business. Create conditions in which you can understand how suitable this activity is for you: for example, register withfree business game"Your start" . This is a business simulator where you can start and develop your business in a fun and safe way, gaining a lot in the process useful information about entrepreneurship.

    Once concretized and visualized, we must remember our goal and its positive emotional components. Constantly imagine how you will practice interesting projects as part of a business or choosing curtains for the bedroom in your home. Think positive.

    Do not doubt your abilities, believe in victory and do not assume other options. For people who have achieved in life high performance, people often ask: “How were you able to implement such a complex project?” In response, many of them say: “I made the decision that I must follow this path to the end, whatever it may be.”

    Memory

    Memory is very important for harmonious personality. We constantly need the ability to remember information and operate with it: in study, work and even entertainment. You can only carry on a conversation if you have something interesting to say. How can you do this if you don’t remember the plot of the book you read or the ups and downs of your own journey?

    For successful work memory is one of the main tools. The more a person achieves, the greater the flow of information rushes through him. How to deal with it if the flash drive does not hold large volumes? Write everything down? Well, no, this is not an option.

    Memory, like all other qualities, can be developed through exercise. For example, readhow to become smarter in 15 minutes a day, and apply this information in practice.

    Time planning

    It is impossible to complete complex and multi-stage work without planning all its steps. This also applies to self-development. Anyone who wants to change their life for the better must have a plan for the year, month, week and day.

    But you also need to be able to plan. Not everyone is able to make realistic and feasible plans the first time. Therefore, we recommend studying25 rules for planning timeso that this skill makes the job easier, not more difficult.

    There are secrets of planning that optimize work so much that you wonder - where did I spend so much time before? To learn how to use all 24 hours wisely, go throughfree course to help improve productivity.

    Discipline

    Discipline is another pillar of self-development that you can’t do without. All practices aimed at improvement require constant and routine repetition. Anyone can go for a run once, every third person can last a week, and only a few can turn running into an integral part of their schedule.

    Discipline is necessary both in order to give up bad habits, and in order to adhere to a daily routine, and to accustom yourself to proper nutrition.

    It also takes discipline to deal with one of the worst enemies development - laziness. Finding the answers to the questionhow to overcome laziness, we become closer to our goals.

    Psychology

    Our results depend greatly on our mindset and attitudes. If you think “I won’t succeed anyway,” then that’s what will happen. If we consider all rich people to be thieves and scoundrels, then we will never become rich - we don’t want to be bad. If you are sure that “all men are assholes,” then you will meet such a companion.

    How to think and what to think is up to us. Find out,how to think effectively– and you will save a lot of time and effort that you spent on soul-searching, worries and destructive emotions.

    Self-esteem

    A person accepts only what he considers himself worthy of. Everyone sets their own level of income, attention from the opposite sex, and other life criteria.

    Unrealistic self-esteem (overestimated or underestimated) prevents its owner from realizing himself in life. We do illogical things and choose to lose, subconsciously believing that this should be our fate. Failures, suffering, communication with toxic people - these are all the choices of a person with unhealthy self-esteem.

    To correct the situation, you need to understandreasons for low self-esteemand try to eliminate them. Often they are hidden in deep childhood, associated with parental divorce or bullying at school - letting go of such things is very difficult, but necessary.

    Self confidence

    I will succeed, successful people tell themselves. They are confident that they are capable of achieving more, and even in case of failure they continue to believe that they will succeed, but next time.

    Most main resource person - himself. You need to trust yourself, believe in yourself, respect yourself and love yourself.

    But how many people hate themselves... They don’t even want to buy themselves beautiful clothes because they “don’t deserve it.” Before you start developing, you need to find the answer to the question:how to love yourself? Self-improvement without self-love is impossible...


    A harmonious personality is strong in all planes of life at the same time. To develop yourself evenly, you need to compose step by step plan, which will include all the main growth vectors.

    This plan is individual for everyone. One solves integrals in his head, but has not yet learned how to build relationships with the opposite sex, the second throws a two-pound weight with one left hand, but has read only one book in his entire life. And the third may even come to the understanding that he doesn’t really know how to do anything and has not developed any of the vectors.

    When building a plan, you need to take into account all areas, but at the same time carry out supporting work where you have already achieved success (so that there is no bias in the opposite direction) and devote more time to those aspects that have not yet been developed.

    Spirituality is a complex and multifaceted issue. We won't talk about religion and philosophy now, that's too much complex topics in order to discuss them now. Let's talk about those aspects of spirituality that make a person happy.

    Gratitude. Having learned to be grateful for every little thing, we always experience joy even in Hard times. A grateful person will be able to find a ray of hope in the fluttering of spring leaves and the games of a kitten. He easily forgives the shortcomings of his loved ones, remembering that they were there when he needed help. Gratitude is wealth.

    Love. To love unselfishly, without possessive manners, of course, without demands - this is high art. It brings joy, just like playing your favorite instrument or looking at the ocean. True love knows neither fear nor pain.

    A spiritual person always feels responsible for his actions, lives consciously, and strives to be better. He does not lose faith and does not allow himself to fall into despair, he strives to explore the world and be free from passions, addictions and negative thoughts.

    What do you mean by “personal growth”? This is the improvement of indicators responsible for intellectual activity and wealth inner world, improving the quality of life at the mental level. Achievements of goals, positive thinking, development of memory and intelligence - all this is included in the concept of personal growth.

    To make it completely clear, I will say that the results of personal growth remain with us forever, even if we find ourselves completely bankrupt without a roof over our heads. Mature personality will have enough knowledge and skills, fortitude and motivation, determination and self-confidence to withstand the most difficult situation. A person with low personality indicators is dependent on material possessions, and therefore lives in fear of losing what he has.

    People who have gone through illness or lost their ability to work understand the importance of health more than anyone else. You can work, study, develop, love and explore the world only if you have the strength to do so.

    Young people often neglect their health. It seems to them that they will always be strong, no matter how they eat, drink alcohol or smoke. IN mature age, feeling the consequences of their frivolity, they clutch their heads and bite their elbows. Some people come to their senses in time and manage to restore their health, but it is often too late.

    We have enough information and understand wellhow to be healthy. We know very well that we should not indulge in bad habits, overeat, work until exhaustion, or be nervous a lot. But how often do we use this knowledge in practice?

    The problem of modern busy people is especially common - they do not know how to relax properly. But rest is the key productive work. Breathing exercises, meditation, relaxation in nature, voluntary solitude, quality sleep - moments that need to be given enough attention.

    You definitely need to introduce physical activity into your life, at least walks in the park. We’re not talking about professional sports – it’s more of a traumatic activity than a useful one. But light physical activity puts the body in a state of vigor and gives energy. Let it be dancing, badminton, cycling - whatever brings you pleasure. The main thing is that they should be regular.

    Relationship

    Each person has their own type of relationship. They are different, but equally require constant work: building frameworks, expressing love, caring, spending time together. Unhappy is the one who earns a lot of money but does not see his children grow up.

    The relationship with one more person is very important - yourself. In fact, it is from them that the building of all other connections begins. Anyone who respects and loves himself knows how to respect and love others. The one who can't find common language with himself, will never make friends with others.

    All people need to realize their potential at work, make a difference to others, and do something they are proud of. This is such a deep-seated need that ignoring it makes a person unhappy, even if outwardly everything is going well for him.

    Therefore, it is important to choose a business for career development that is fun and enjoyable to do. When you wake up thinking: “Hurray, today there are so many interesting work!”, the issue of money and promotion will be resolved by itself.

    Of course, not everything in this world can be bought with money, and in general, their role is too exaggerated. But it’s impossible without them. Having financial freedom, we feel calm and confident, we can afford to travel, spend money on cultural and mental development, eat right, provide for our family, and help our parents.

    Most of us are employed. You can earn a good income from such a job, especially if you are a good worker and are constantly moving up the career ladder. But this is not always the case, and many specialists, having reached the career ceiling in some organization, come to the conclusion that it is time to go free. You just need to understand how to start correctly.

    To do this you can gofree training to help you start your own business. By working for ourselves, we can achieve much more financially.

    How are you spending the New Year? I’ll try to guess: put up the Christmas tree, set the table, buy champagne and ring your glasses as the chimes strike, making wishes. There are brave souls who break the system to smithereens - they do not cook Olivier salad and herring under a fur coat.

    Why not order a quest for the whole family? Or go to the forest, light a fire and decorate a real Christmas tree? Or do something else crazy?

    And we would like to, but we don’t know how, right? So it turns out that our imagination is enough to refuse Olivier at the New Year's table.

    Many interesting adventures and unprecedented undertakings do not require serious expenses, physical training and a lot of time. We just don't have enough ideas. In order to turn into a person rich in inventions, you need to know How develop creative thinking.

    Making your life bright is not as difficult as it seems. This is not a whim or a luxury - our soul and brain need emotions, impressions, joy, delight. All this makes our personality richer, nourishes us like a sweet elixir.

    In the process of self-development, not only the mood is important, but also the quality of information. We mainly get it from books and films, which we will discuss below.

    10 best films for self-development

    Films useful for development can be divided into three categories: feature films, where deep philosophy and motivation lie; documentaries, where you can learn more about the world around you, human psychology and the path of civilization; and biographical - about people from whom you can take an example.

    You can bring a wholelist of biographical filmsabout outstanding people, but I will remember only one thing: this is a BBC documentary about the greatest scientist who discovered many physical laws. He unraveled the nature of light and gave us the law universal gravity. But what kind of personality was Newton, what allowed him to become the most enlightened mind of the era and what secrets did he hide?

    A film with the unsurpassed Jim Carrey in leading role. This story is about a loser named Carl Allen, whose life passes him by. Karl always answers “no” to all proposals and is content with the existence of a hermit, because he is afraid to even leave the apartment. But an event happens that forces Karl to say “yes” to any, even the most insane proposal. And this is where his new life begins.

    Comedy film about life priorities and about how important it is to be attentive to your words. Brings a special charm main character in the role of Eddie Murphy - this is the one who can chat endlessly and with great speed. Successful literary agent Jack McCall, who knows how to persuade even the dead, pushes family and love into the background, devoting all his time to his career and money. But having learned that there are only a thousand words left in his life, and that he will die after saying the last, Jack begins to think about what is more important to him.

    - French comedy about two completely different people who met each other at the very difficult moment life. He tells viewers that in dark days we can be helped by those from whom we did not expect it, and that there are no chance meetings.

    is both a feature and a documentary film about planet Earth, our Home. Its author is photographer Yann Arthus-Bertrand, who once became interested in videography from a hot air balloon and was able to capture many beautiful and unexpected types. Director: Luc Besson.

    We can see the beauty of wild nature in all its scale, and the traces of human exploration of the planet - so small from a bird's eye view, but so globally changing the appearance of our Home forever. Who are we, and what is the role of each of us in the destruction or creation of the Earth? Are we ready to take responsibility for preserving our monastery?

    "Secret"

    "Secret" - a documentary interview about how a person attracts events with the help of thought, about the power of desire and the materiality of information. The film consists of a series of interviews with different people who outline the philosophical basis of the “law of attraction” using examples from their own lives.

    - a feature film-parable with handsome James Marsden in the title role. The hero of the film, Neil Oliver, makes a wish for his birthday “to get the answer to your life,” and it is miraculously fulfilled by a nearby wizard. From this moment on, a series of amazing events unfold that go beyond the usual understanding and perception. Everything that the hero goes through forces him to rethink his attitudes, learn to trust himself and make the main decision: who he should be.

    - a film about goals. In the face of death, when there is nothing to be afraid of, when all conventions and attitudes turn out to be just dust, a person can achieve any goal he sets. We live as if we are immortal, constantly postponing life until later. But in reality, we have very little time, and we need to realize our dreams right now.

    "Pay someone else"

    "Pay someone else" - touching film about the boy Trevor, who came up with interesting system mutual assistance. He did good deeds absolutely unselfishly, but at the same time asked to “pay someone else,” that is, to do good to a stranger. So the chain of good deeds grew and went not only beyond the city, but also beyond the state. One child changed the lives of many, and this makes us think: after all, we too can change the world, we just need to want to.

    This mystical and deeply psychological film is based on the book of the same name by Stephen King. It talks about last place prisoners where they are prepared for execution. Death is in the air, everyone becomes real in front of its face: someone demonstrates nobility, someone demonstrates baseness of spirit. Staying true to yourself and helping even your executioners - only strong man. It is he who changes the worldview of everyone who meets him.

    10 best books for self-development

    It is known that the most successful people read a lot, and mostly special literature– in psychology, self-development, your profession. Art books We also need to read - they enrich our vocabulary and develop our imagination.

    You need to read a lot and regularly - it is advisable to create a schedule for yourself and set reading standards for each day so that the work moves in the same rhythm. Your schedule should includelist of books on meditation, psychology, business and finance, history of the country and the world, biographies, philosophical literature and motivational books.

    And so that you can cover large amounts of information without much stress, we recommend taking a free course"Reactive Brain" . Its developers took speed reading techniques as a basis and enriched them with exercises to speed up thinking and structure information.

    The author of the book independently walked the path to success from scratch. Even without finishing school and starting his work as a laborer, he became the vice president of the company. By exploring his own experiences and the stories of others, Brian Tracy became a famous psychologist and wrote many books about success and how to achieve it.

    Have you ever wondered how much resource we spend on being nervous, worrying, suffering from failures and worrying about the future. Our nerves and emotions also require energy, and by ceasing to worry about the inevitable, we free up a lot of time and energy for work. Mark Manson teaches us how to achieve goals without being held back by unnecessary emotions, and to move on even after the most epic failures.

    A long time ago, in the 1960s, in the vastness of Mexico, anthropologist Carlos met the Yaqui Indian Don Juan, who turned out to be a magician. He passed on all the knowledge to his new student, and Castaneda wrote it down in the form of field notes, later published in ten volumes. We don’t encourage you to read all ten, but we recommend volume three, “Journey to Ixtlan.” It contains a summary of don Juan's philosophy - the path of the warrior, relationships with the world and oneself. An important concept is the sense of self-importance that slows a person down in achieving goals. Advice: think of the book itself as a fairy tale with a moral, since the main thing in it is philosophy, not plot.

    An autobiographical book by an American journalist who managed to change her life and make her dreams come true in a situation from which there seemed to be no way out. A girl from a family of 11 children, Regina went through difficult trials in life and managed to cope with them. These tips are about learning to live with your past and letting go of grudges while moving forward.

    Robert Kiyosaki: "Rich Dad Poor Dad"

    It's always interesting to read books by people who have lived colorful lives. Robert Kiyosaki was a marine, a pilot, a sales agent, a businessman, and a teacher. Today he is a successful investor and writer whose books have become bestsellers. He teaches not how to make money, but how to change your thinking, because it is the main key to wealth.

    Bruce Lee "The Way of the Leading Fist"

    Who hasn't heard of the legendary Bruce Lee? We know that he was a martial artist and famous actor, but we forget that he was also a philosopher and reformer in the field of martial arts. His notes were published in 1975, after the author's death. They seem to be dedicated to martial arts, but in reality they are full of deep reflections on the development of the warrior’s personality.

    We have already talked about willpower and its importance for development, and now let’s pick up a book about the method of cultivating this property in ourselves. Psychologist and teacher Kelly McGonigal has carefully studied this issue and came to the conclusion that in attempts to develop willpower, we are often guided by false ideas and are captive of stereotypes. The book talks about research, experiments, people who put Kelly's advice into practice and the results they were able to achieve.

    Lao Tzu "Tao Te Ching"

    It is not for nothing that this book is placed at the very end - it is better not for weak minds to mess with it. Lao Tzu is an ancient Chinese philosopher who is credited with authoring a treatise on the two principles of life: Tao and Te. It is better to read it little by little, several sentences a day. You can study Lao Tzu all your life, but never fully understand it. Therefore, do not be alarmed if at first his sayings seem like sheer rubbish. Even one meaningful idea from the treatise will bring a lot of practical benefit to the reader - for example, about non-action as an important component of activity.

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